Subtitles section Play video Print subtitles It's hard work and you still have to do it all with a smile on your face. I like the fast-paced environment. Before I bring anything to the table, it needs to be perfect. There's never dull moment. Very physical, very raw. There's never enough money. I'll just say that. There's never enough money. Three-fourths of my yearly income come from tips. I make $2.65 an hour. In New Jersey, I was making $2.13 an hour. $2.13 an hour. $2.13. So I don't really per se live off of paychecks as much as I do tips. I think tipping is great for economy and small businesses. You walk out with cash. But if we don't smile, if we don't look cute... we don't make good tips. You hope you do good enough to get at least 10 percent. It's always true when you really need money, you're disenfranchised . With men, you have to kind of be careful. You can't be too sweet. you can't be too, you know, serious. He was flirting with me heavily and he racked up about a $70 tab. And when I turned him down for dinner and drinks, he wrote a zero in the tip line. He grabbed me, pulled me by my waist and started trying to kiss me on my neck and stuff. And I'm pushing him away. But he kept talking about wanting to bend me over and spank me. He looked at me and said, "Would you ride me like a pony?” “I've never been with a black girl.” I felt a hand go underneath my dress. He was asking me where I live. I screamed to my manager, who who happened to be there, Hey, that guy just touched me. Nothing happened. Sex does sell. You have to balance it out, but still try to keep your dignity. Most of my day is geared towards — how is a man going to feel about me? How can I maximize tips without feeling overly sexualized? Between the hair and the makeup and how much cleavage do I want to show today? You don't want to look too sexy, but you don't also want to look sexless. And you must always be aware of the balance. It's a very thin line. Yep. You know I'll put up with some stuff to get the tip. You know the little, "Ah, you're so funny." That might be an extra $5 right there. Do I like doing that? No. At my job, I'm at now, this whole thing is going on, the #MeToo movement. And I actually heard a guy say, "I don't understand what the problem is. Everybody wants sex. Everybody's got to have sex. What's the problem with this?" I had one guy, while I was trying to lock up, come in and say, "Well, are you here by yourself?" And I'm like, "no, no, no. My cooks are in the back." He said, "No, I've been watching you. There's no one here." That's when I went and got just a little .38 Special revolver that I kept in my purse when I closed. Well, it was my last table. I did all my side work and I was getting ready to go. And I was leaving at the same time he was. We got to my car. And I said, "Thank you so much. You were so great. And I appreciate it." And I go to reach for my door and he blocks my door shut. And it was terrifying. You know and it's not just that you feel frightened. You feel embarrassed. It's awful. It's degrading, it's disgusting. And it made me angry. On one hand, this guy just violated me. And on the other hand , I needed the $20 tip. You have to fight for your tips because you can't just say, No, don't. I had really, really had it. And I wanted to say — I shouldn't have to take home less to my child because some guy wasn't into me that day. Smiling isn't consent. Don't touch me. Don't touch me. Don't touch me. No one needs to touch each other. If I wanted to get hit on, I'd be on the other side of the bar. Yeah.
A2 US TheNewYorkTimes touch tipping hour balance table How Tipping Hurts Women | NYT 12515 780 Samuel posted on 2018/03/21 More Share Save Report Video vocabulary