Subtitles section Play video
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Hi, guys.
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This is Norman Luboff.
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Please do not watch this video, it has very bad words.
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Ronnie's a very bad person.
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Did I mention this is Norman Luboff?
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Did you buy my album?
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It's really good.
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Do some good country, some really good, wholesome stuff.
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So, don't watch this video if you are easily offended by Ronnie or if you like to make
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comments about how Ronnie's rude.
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Instead, buy my record.
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It's really good,
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and I'm really cool.
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Hey, guess what, Norman?
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So this guy's really old, he's...
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This was made...
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Let's see, he's got the greatest choir ever, Mr. Norman Luboff.
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This is actually made...
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I can't find a date.
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I'll find a date on this guy.
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So this guy's really old, and he doesn't want me to teach you bad things.
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If you don't want to hear bad things, if you don't want to listen to bad things,
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if you don't want to learn about sex,
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or if you're a child and your momma and daddy don't want
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you to learn about sex, please turn it off now.
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Are you still with me, then?
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Norman Luboff, popular in the 60s I'm presuming, probably learned his ABCs:
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A is for apple, B is for...
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I don't know.
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I'm going to teach you a different kind of ABCs.
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This is the dirty ABCs with Ronnie: "Sex With Ronnie."
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If you want to see more sex with Ronnie, I got another video for you, but this one's
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the ABCs of sex with Ronnie.
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A is for "anus", which means "asshole", which is the part of your bum.
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B is for "boner" and "chubby".
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"Boner" and "chubby" means your dick is hard.
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"Dickhead" has two meanings.
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One, it means the top of your penis.
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The other way we use "dickhead" is if someone's not nice.
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You can say: "You're a dickhead."
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You're basically telling the person that they're the top of a penis.
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So, "erection", "boner", and "chubby" all mean the same.
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"Facial" is not something your mom would get at a salon.
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A "facial" is when your hard boner ejaculates or there's sperm that comes, and it goes over
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somebody's face, covering the face with "jizz", which is for J. "Erection" is hard dick,
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"facial" is jizz on the face.
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"Glory hole" means anything that you can stick your dick in.
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It could be a pie, if you've seen that movie.
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H is for "hard-on", which again means boner.
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I is for "it".
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When you don't want to talk about it, but you want to do it, you can say:
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"Do you want to do it?"
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And "it" just means sex.
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"Jizz" we've already been through.
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"Jerk off" is something you do by yourself when you're very lonely.
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K is for "knocked up", it's also a movie.
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K means you got the girl pregnant or you're pregnant yourself.
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A "landing strip" is the pubic hair of a girl or boy that means that it's shaved or shorn
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so it's like an airplane, and your dick is landing in the landing strip.
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M is for "muff" which means the hair is everywhere.
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N is for "nail", but not this kind of nail.
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N is a verb and it means to have sex.
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"Old fashioned" is a doughnut, but it also means a hand job,
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which is the same as jerk off.
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"Pork", "pound", "poke", and "plow" are also verbs and they mean to have sex.
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Sex with Ronnie, you getting this?
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Q is for "quickie" it means do it fast.
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R is for "rack", also known as boobs.
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S is for "score", hah, you just scored which means you had sex.
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"Tap that ass"
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just means to have sex, doesn't it?
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"Upskirt" is for U, you, this means that you...
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The camera angle is looking up the girl's skirt without her permission.
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Ladies, be careful.
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V is for "vag. jj", also known as vagina.
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W is for "whiskey dick", this means you've drank so much whiskey that you can no longer
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get a boner, a chubby, an erection, or a hard-on.
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It can be any kind of alcohol, but "whiskey dick" went with W. "XXX" means X-rated.
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"Wang" means dick, it's also a last name.
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So when someone's name is Wang, like Vera Wang-
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[laughs]
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-god, that's funny, your name is Vera Dick.
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Love it.
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"Yellow fever", it's kind of racist to me, but it means that a person, usually men who
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really likes Asian girls or a woman who likes Asian boys.
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Apparently Asian people are yellow all of a sudden, so "Asian fever" means you really
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like Asian people.
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"Zeppelins".
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You guys know Led Zeppelin? It's a band.
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"Zeppelins" means the girl has big boobs or a nice rack.
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We can't forget the number "69".
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You've got homework if you don't know what that is.
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Check it out later.
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Adios.
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I've made a mistake with my wonderful rhymes.
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I've told you lies about glory holes and the times.
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A "glory hole" is more intense than you'd imagine.
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A "glory hole" is usually in a bathroom stall where a man would stick his dick
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in a hole in the wall.
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Sometimes there's a mouth at the end of the hole,
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sometimes there's an anus.
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So the next time you're going to the toilet,
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watch out for the hole.
