Name: The 5 Stages of Emotional Regulation — Are You Stuck at Stage 3?
Uploaded: 2025-11-28T17:55:17.000Z
Duration: 7 min 56 s
Description: Thousands of YouTube videos with English-Chinese subtitles! Now you can learn to understand native speakers, expand your vocabulary, and improve your pronunciation...

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How well do you really regulate your emotions?

Sentences with advanced comparative

If you're like most people, the honest answer is not as well as you'd like.

Same Think of your emotions as passengers boarding a train.

Some, like joy and excitement are welcome travelers.

Others, anger, sadness or guilt feel like unwelcome stowaways.

Yet as the train conductor, your job isn't to kick them off.

It's to understand where they're headed and guide the journey.

But what happens when the train feels out of control?

When emotions pile up, derail your focus, or keep circling back?

If you've ever felt stuck in a loop of emotional torment and burnout, you need to know about the process model of emotion regulation.

It helps explain how we experience emotions and why we sometimes get stuck instead of moving through them.

To help you process your emotions better, let's break down the stages and explore the critical stages where most people hit a wall.

Stage 1 situation selection the first step to getting your emotions in check is choosing your emotional environment.

It's like setting your trained schedule, deciding where to go and when.

For this, you will need emotional awareness and understanding.

What am I feeling and why do I feel this way?

Once you understand this, you can make better, more informed choices for your emotional well being.

For example, if being around a certain friend always leads to drama, you might opt to spend less time with them.

A lot of times, life throws you into situations you can't control.

Stage two Situation Modification let's be real.

You can't always control life's curveballs.

You can't stop a family member from saying something upsetting.

But you can control how you react in the moment.

That's the power of modifying your environment.

It gives you a sense of agency when things feel overwhelming.

For example, you imagine you're at a family dinner and a tense topic comes up, something you know always causes arguments.

Instead of letting the conversation spiral out of control and stewing in frustration, you take action to change the topic.

When you come home from a stressful workday.

Rather than trying to forget about it with some mindless tv, take a few minutes to declutter your space.

It's amazing how a tidy room can create a clearer mind.

Think of this step as adjusting your train's tracks.

It's about making intentional changes to ease emotional pressure and actively engage with your feelings.

Stage 3 Attentional Deployment okay, so at this stage, you're dealing with a powerful urge to either focus or distract yourself from from your emotions Imagine you've just had a heated argument with a friend and you're pissed.

You walk out and try to do things to distract yourself and avoid the discomfort.

Maybe you talk to another friend, pretending everything's fine, or just lock yourself in your room for a while and do random things.

Or you might do the opposite and fixate on your anger and ruminate on it, ranting to anyone who will listen.

not without sending a long rant about how your friendship is over.

Well, many tend to get stuck in this stage because while distraction and overthinking feel like coping, they're actually avoidance strategies.

Instead of learning how to process your emotions, you either ignore them, intellectualize them, or blow them out of proportion.

This frustration feels like tension in my chest.

Let it move through you like a passenger getting off the train at their next stop.

This step is uncomfortable but essential, and

the more you practice this, the more you'll realize that emotions aren't something to fear.

Stage 4 Cognitive Change Once you've allowed your emotions to just be present, it's time to reframe how you think about the situation.

So let's say you've had a rough day at work and feel defeated.

If you let your thoughts spiral, you might start thinking I'm not good enough or I always mess up.

These thoughts can trap you in a cycle of negativity.

Instead, cognitive change is about taking a step back and rethinking those thoughts.

For example, instead of focusing on the mistakes, you could remind yourself, I learned something today and that's progress.

Or maybe this wasn't my best day, but I've handled worse before.

This step is like changing the route of your train.

Instead of letting it stay on a track of defeat, you shift a direction toward a healthier, more empowering perspective.

You're not ignoring the negative, you're just choosing to see the bigger picture and highlight the growth and opportunities within the experience.

Stage 5 response modulation finally, you're at the stage where the emotion you've been processing needs to be expressed.

The way you express your emotions directly impacts how well you move through them.

Let's say you're feeling frustrated about a disagreement with a loved one.

Instead of snapping at them or bottling up your feelings, this stage encourages you to express yourself calmly and constructively.

Maybe you take a deep breath, then say something like I felt hurt when that happened.

By expressing your emotions in a way that's clear but respectful, you're not only processing them in a healthy way, you're also opening the door for more meaningful conversations and solutions.

This stage is about letting your emotions guide your actions without letting them control you.

It's like allowing the train to arrive at its destination smoothly instead of crashing off track.

you know when and how to stop and start based on where the emotions are taking you.

If you're feeling stuck or overwhelmed by your emotions, the process model of emotion regulation offers a simple roadmap.

It's a process that takes takes practice, but

the more you engage with your emotions, the more in control you'll be.

So what stage resonates most with your experiences?

Share your insights in the comments down below and if you found this video valuable like share and subscribe to our channel for more thought provoking content.

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The 5 Stages of Emotional Regulation — Are You Stuck at Stage 3?

cognitive

stick

overwhelmed

process