Name: Close Encounter 50th – SNL50
Uploaded: 2025-02-17T13:46:36.000Z
Duration: 8 min 44 s
Description: Thousands of YouTube videos with English-Chinese subtitles! Now you can learn to understand native speakers, expand your vocabulary, and improve your pronunciation...

Participle clauses

Thank you all for coming. I'm General Fairfax with the U.S. Space Force. This is Dr. Tyler from SETI. We are eager to talk to you, as you have all experienced a verified alien abduction. This is wild. One minute we're three friends slamming Miller Tallboys behind a Dollar Tree, now we're sitting at the Pentagon. Hey, I've been meaning to ask, like, why do you call it the Pentagon when it's only got five sides? Because a shape with five sides is called the Pentagon. I don't think that's right. We'll look into it. Now, let's start with how you were all brought aboard the spacecraft. Well, this beam of light appeared from the bottom of the ship, floated me up like a soft hand, beckoning me. Same, same. And we met these two beautiful, glowing aliens who took our hands and said, welcome. I've never felt so safe. And you, Ms. Rafferty? Yeah, a little different for me. I was less cradled by light and more grabbed by a giant rusty claw, which yanked me right out of my slacks. So I'm pantsless, right? I'm folded in half like a wallet, nips to knees. I'm getting winced skyward with my vagety and my tragedy, flapping in the breeze. And I'm tossed into the bottom of the ship. I see my old pals, the gray aliens with the big dumb eyes. Ms. Rafferty, I'm told this is your fifth time being abducted by these gray aliens? Yeah. Only other place I've been pantsless five times is Six Flags. Okay, well, let's move past that. Now, what happened next in the upper part of the ship? Well, the smart aliens bathed us in this glowing liquid that erased all my pain. My bad knee didn't even hurt. I busted it a few years back playing paintball. Competitive. Okay, don't know why you winked at me after saying that, but let's continue. Were you also bathed in this light, sir? Yes, ma'am. It felt better than any drug, including the ones I'm on right now. Okay, see, now that really tweaks my cheeks because down in steerage, the mood was tense.

Modal verbs - B1

Strange. Now, what do you think could have caused this reaction? Well, between you, me, and Jesus, see, I think it had to do with the state of my down there hair. Because remember,

Adverbs of manner

I'm Donald Duck in it, okay? Shirt, no pants. So my poke bowl and my smokey hole are out, and pubically speaking, nature has reclaimed the earth. Last time I had a Brazilian down there was 2002. His name was Diego, and he got strep throat. Who mows the lawn in winter, am I right? Amen. Okay, I'll ask you maybe not to say amen to that kind of comment.

Mr. Afferty, I'm failing to see what your unkempt private area has to do with the alien's demeanor.

Okay, my theory is I think they thought it was an animal. Because, wait, Kermit, do you mind?

Here, look. First, they didn't know if it was friendly, so they're cautious, and they're kind of, they're going up, tapping it, and then going. And then, then the alpha comes in, and he challenges it, right? He goes like this.

And then, so he gives a thumbs up, like, we're good, it's tame. And then, whoa, it's playtime. And then one of them, sorry, Dusty, you mind? One of them comes up under it, puts it on like a wig. He's doing this, he's like doing prop comedy. And then another one, he's trying to, he's so excited, he's like wrestling with it. Like it's his brother pulling me all around the room. So I look down, I see a guy between my legs with a smile on his face, and I'm like, I don't know, first time for everything. Amen. Okay, again, not a thing to say amen to. Anyway, this goes on about 15 minutes until who comes through the door but my friggin' mother, Colleen Senior. Yes, we actually had some questions for her as well.

Sorry, sorry, my bathroom break took longer than I thought. My number one turned into a number three.

Mega milf alert. Sir, let's nod. Now, Mrs. Rafferty, you had been abducted earlier that same evening? Yep, us Rafferty gals, we always attracted the freaks. For years,

I thought Colleen's father was part alien, but turns out he was just uncircumcised.

Amen. You gotta, you gotta stop. Please, stop. Stop. Anyways, I still had my pants on when they took me, but that was good because much like her, I got a into the woods sort of a situation.

My ex used to say that it was like trying to hack his way through the black forest.

Okay, I feel like we're off track. You said that after arriving on the ship, the aliens lost interest and quote, stuck you in a closet? Yeah, yeah, can you believe that?

I mean, hey, I'm used to being stuffed into closets, but it's usually, you know, when the guy's wife comes home late or something, or early or whatever. Anyway, so I'm, all of a sudden I hear the screaming, this one, and so I just kind of, just kind of bust out of that. I just bust out and I just kicked those little, I just kicked those little pervs away.

Wow, you are a good mama. Yeah, well, a good mother can also be a bad girl.

What's your name, mustache? Okay, can we not do any of that right now, please. How, how did you all exit the spacecraft? That same soft light picked me up and placed me back in my bed.

Me too. That light even tucked me in, which was so thoughtful of it. And how did you two

Well, in the past, I've just been pushed out of a hatch, but this time, that's what happened too.

Yeah, but my pants got snagged on a piece of metal, so they're gone. And then, uh, as for underwear, underwear-wise, you know, this devil wears nada. I mean, I don't know, I don't, I don't know, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't,

As for underwear, underwear-wise, you know, this devil wears nada.

Basically, we just, uh, kind of, it was a free fall for 40 feet with our carpets and our tar pits on full display. Yeah, we crashed through a ceiling, we land ass up on top of Phil McDermott.

Yeah. Who is Phil McDermott? He's a gentleman whose family, I bet, wish they went with the clothes casket funeral. Not the worst thing my mom and I have done in a church. Okay, let's, let's, please, let's not finish that story at all. Thank you for your candor. We're going to take you for some psychological tests now. Oh, we'll save you the trouble. Fail.