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  • Released in 2008, this romantic-fantasy film based on the Stephenie Meyer novel grossed

  • an absolute shit-ton of money from horny teenage girls looking to fantasize about Robert Pattison's

  • gorgeous face. Combined with DVD sales, this epic cinematic masterpiece of broodingly handsome

  • vampires grossed over a half-billion dollars. And quite frankly, it should come of no surprise

  • to you, since everything about this movie is perfection. April Fools! Twilight obviously

  • isn't the best movie ever made, but - no joke - I actually found myself enjoying most of

  • this rather childish film, but lets continue with this sarcastic review just the same.The

  • first in an eventual trilogy of epic proportions, Twilight is the story of sexy 17-year-old

  • Bella Swan, who besides being total jailbait, moves to a small down in Washington State

  • to live with her father, and have premarital relations with a 126 year old bloodsucking

  • vampire. Her first day at her new high school Bella, played with just the right amount of

  • constipation in her facial expressions by Kristen Stewart, bumps into her beautiful

  • co-star, and the only person in the entire movie that can actually act, Oscar nominee

  • Anna Kendrick who plays some dateless loser nerd at Forks High School. Later, Bella meets

  • Pattison's character, Edward Cullen - a pale faced loner who is more awkward around Bella

  • than 24's Chloe O'Brien on her menstrual cycle. With a look on his face that screams, "I need

  • to take a wicked poop right now", Edward skips town for a week, and by the time he returns,

  • Bella is seemingly in love with him. Poorly written and acted from the outset, Edward's

  • character is absolutely average - a vampire for over a century he is able to expertly

  • disguise him true identity and blend in with teenagers, and win over the love of Bella

  • - that is of course until she does about an hour of research on Google and discovers that

  • he's really a vampire. But don't worry, he doesn't bite humans, and he has the ability

  • to read minds, invoke a motion-blur effect on command, and sparkle in the sunlight! As

  • cheesy, and as a pussy-whipped as the vampires in Twilight are - I found this movie to be

  • quite enjoyable. Sure, the acting is god-awful at times, the SFX need lots of work, and these

  • vampires are nothing like Count Orlok from Nosferatu - but I actually found myself caring

  • about the outcomes of the characters in this story. There is nothing impressive about a

  • single aspect of this movie, but for it's trying to accomplish - a romantic fantasy

  • film involving vampires... it definitely succeeds. The story itself of a vegetarian vampire falling

  • in love with a pasty underage girl is also one of the more original plots Hollywood has

  • adapted in a while. Well, that's what I thought about Twilight - and while nearly all of you

  • were much harsher on this film than me, lets take a look at the YouTube comments just the

  • same.

  • GourmetCandyChef A horrible film with horrible acting and a horrible storyline, it give Vampires

  • a bad name, worst movie i have ever wasted time on, and i didn't even sit through the

  • whole thing, 1/10

  • JRFWhatIsItNow A very interesting novel with mysterious characters. However, it does not

  • work well as a movie at all. Questionable scene transitions, uneven performances, and

  • sub-par directing make this vampire better off dead.

  • Well, our scores seem to be all over the place, so lets go ahead and rate Twilight!

  • A 5 and a 1! In a rare instance, my score is actually significantly higher than yours!

  • Twilight wasn't a great movie by any means, but I also didn't think it was nearly as horrible

  • as everyone is saying. It may have been awkward, but I was able to enjoy it for what it was,

  • I scored it an "Alright". You folks vehemently insulted this film, hating everything from

  • the sparkly vampires to Stewart's atrocious acting - scoring it a Garbage.

Released in 2008, this romantic-fantasy film based on the Stephenie Meyer novel grossed

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B2 bella twilight vampire film horrible edward

Twilight -- Movie Review

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    阿多賓 posted on 2014/01/18
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