Name: How to Boost Self-Confidence
Uploaded: 2020-03-10T20:34:49.000Z
Duration: 17 min 27 s
Description: Thousands of YouTube videos with English-Chinese subtitles! Now you can learn to understand native speakers, expand your vocabulary, and improve your pronunciation...

It's Linda Rainer of Linda, rainer dot com, career strategist and intuitive purpose coach.

Modal verbs - A2

I helped driven professionals like you to enhance your personal brand so that you can pursue a career you'll truly enjoy.

And in this video, I really want to talk about the idea of grounding yourself in order to feel confident in your daily life, but more specifically in your career.

And so I have a strategy and technique that I'd like to share with you and really get a greater understanding and awareness for what confidence really is and how you can use it as a crew key ingredients in having a more fulfilling, an exciting career.

So the whole topic of confidence, really.

The reason why I'm making this video is because it came up consistently in a lot of my client sessions in the past couple weeks and you know, but beyond talking about resumes and interviews and talking about job search, strategy and all that stuff, the next biggest topic that, um, I discussed with my clients is their confidence levels and confidence is something that we all have struggled with in our lives.

I mean, there's no way that there's nobody out there who hasn't struggled at some level with their self confidence.

And when I say self confidence, I specifically mean the idea in your head that maybe I'm not good enough.

Maybe I'm not good enough as, ah, husband or a wife or is a parent, You know, whatever rules you may be playing, there have been times I'm sure that you've questioned whether you were good enough.

And what happens with this is that if there's a time that you question yourself in that way and you don't know how to deal with it, and you don't know how to overcome that subconscious belief that maybe you might just not be good enough, what ends up happening is that when there's difficult times that you end up going through, you know it.

Let's say you lose a job or let's say you've, you know, sort of hit a roadblock in your career.

Something's happened at work and you're not knowing how to deal with it.

All of a sudden, that subconscious kind of silent thoughts that existed and was put away in the back corner of your mind.

All of a sudden, it lurks its ugly head, and it starts expressing itself, and it starts seeping into your psyche and into how you feel, and it starts eating away at your self esteem.

That's the danger of having the subconscious beliefs that maybe we're not good enough where you know, and that's really where self confidence issues comes from.

So in order to get rid of this subconscious believing in order to really get to the root of the problem and understand why it's there and how we can overcome it through grounding ourselves, we first should really understand.

In my opinion, I believe, because I was born and raised in North America in Canada specifically, I know that here the school system and I believe the school system I know the school system system is pretty much the same all throughout North America, where we've grown up to be taught that life is all about competition, till about beating others at their game or at our game or whatever game we're playing.

It's about being on top all about me versus you.

It's all about separation, as opposed to this sense of collective unity and moving forward with growth and progress.

It's really about I'm where I'm at compared to you and I have to.

I have to compare myself to you based on just one measure, and that's really unfair, because what happens is we end up growing up feeling as though we're always up against someone else or that we always have to compare ourselves to other people.

And that's where the danger comes in is that you know, we go through school comparing ourselves to everyone else, making sure that we're better than everyone else.

We're trying to meet our parent's expectations or meet whoever's expectations of us were trying Thio feel good about ourselves, and the only way that we feel good about ourselves is if we beat someone else at something and this doesn't stop with school.

This continues on as we start our careers and as we continue on in our careers, where you and a few other people are dying for the one promotion for that one next level up and or you're looking for a new job and it's you against five other candidates, you know, it's all about competition.

It's all about trying to beat the next person out and trying to trying to be the best, and this is very depressing.

This is a very depressing way to live, because that means that you're you're purely valuing yourself based on how you perform against someone else, and that other person could be at the same level as you are.

They could be worse off than you are, or they could be better than you are and then all of a sudden, because you're not good enough in the world's eyes.

You don't feel good about yourself and you dwindle downwards into this ball of darkness.

I mean, it doesn't have to be that dramatic, but trust me, I've seen people not feeling great, and it was all because they just don't have that self belief.

And so when it comes to not having that confidence, what we really have to realize is that confidence does not come from you comparing yourself to someone else.

Confidence does not come from you actually truly beating someone else and being better, that's that's fake confidence.

I'll tell you that It's not lasting confidence lasting genuine confidence on Lee and will always come from within and will only always come from within your heart.

Because if it's coming from the ego where you feel, oh, I'm making more money than that person or oh, I had a better performance review than that other person and you're you're riding high on just that type of confidence.

That's actually just ego, that's all ego.

And guess what happens if one day all this set in your salary plummets or you lose that job or you Or, you know, your performance rating is worse than the colleague that you sit next to what happens.

It's like a complete balloon has burst and you just fall apart.

You feel like you're not worth anything because your results don't show for it.

And that's not the right way to truly live.

Honestly, it isn't because to live that way means that you're constantly basing yourself on external expectations, and you're on this constant, volatile roller coaster that will never end until the day you die versus tapping into your own inner self, tapping into who you truly are and getting centered and grounded from that space, which I'll explain, and knowing that no matter what situation you're in, no matter where you're at, no matter who you're with, that you can feel comfortable in your own skin and that you can feel confident in who you are and what you're capable of.

There's a difference toe living from that peaceful, centered place and living from that competition comparison, external view place.

There's two different perspectives there, and when you're living outside of yourself and when you're comparing yourself constantly and when you're seeing that things aren't happening for you and you're allowing that to dwindle you down to dwindle yourself worth your self esteem.

What ends up happening is it blocks future opportunities from being able to get to you.

It blocks you from being able to truly blossom in the career that you really want to.

D'oh because you're spending all your energy in time in cowering and lowering your energy to a level where nothing can get to you.

Well, right now, I really just want to share with you.

If you're not feeling confident in your career or your in your life, or whatever you're dealing with.

Then it's time to take a look at where is my perspective?

Am I looking outside myself and comparing myself to others and thinking that I need to meet the world's expectations of what good is an amazing is and being the best is and trying to live by those standards or for truly the first time since childhood since before I've gone, you know, I went to school and got this confidence edged out of me.

Do I want to go back and return to this place where I'm confident who I am and they know who I am, and I want to get to know myself a little bit better, and I want to remove those emotional blocks and I want to get clear and clear within my heart, and I want my heart to lead me and guide me to where it is that I need to go.

And when it comes to centering yourself and when it comes to getting grounded, the key way to doing that your heart is the key to living a centered life to living a connected life.

Two feeling truly confident and so one step of the way to getting there to get into that more confident, truly authentic self that is within you.

One step of the way is to meditate, case to do true deep meditation.

And when I say deep meditation, what I really mean is set aside some time every single day, preferably in the morning where you can close your eyes and you can breathe and you can get centered back within yourself.

And what happens during this time is if there are thoughts, which there will be thoughts that come floating in and out and, you know, are telling you things and pushing you to stop meditating and annoying you.

Whatever what you're doing in that process while you're meditating is your training.

You're getting your heart to train your mind to realize that Hold on, you have no power over me.

If I say that you don't, I have the power to say that you are secondary and that the thoughts that come through I can simply acknowledge that they're there.

You'll start to notice a separation between the thoughts and your hearts.

Second step of the way is to start listening to the feelings, the guidance that you get from your heart space during this meditative period and during the day as well.

Whenever you're getting creative ideas or intuitive hits or just feelings off, I just feel like I want to do this one thing where that I I need thio.

I need to research this a little bit more.

I need to delve into this a little bit more.

Follow that followed what your heart is telling you to d'oh or fits that.

You know, when I go into this meeting, I want Thio.

I want to connect with this person in this specific way.

If that's what your heart is telling you, then allow that toe happen.

What we do so often is that we can't even hear what our heart is trying to tell us when it comes to our careers, and when it comes to our daily lives, we allow our hearts to just simply stay silent.

Well Actually, our hearts never really stay silent, but we caused them.

We suffocate our hearts to the point where it has to be silent because we're piling on all these thoughts and mostly not the most pleasant thoughts, mostly negative thoughts and said and and filling our minds up with all kinds of things, all kinds of beliefs that are not serving us.

Second step is to start listening to your heart, start listening to that guidance more.

I mean, I honestly think there's gonna be a lot more steps that I'll end up sharing with you.

But one final step that I think will help to get you in this process is to be hyper aware every single day, whether you're at the office or they're looking for a new job.

You're golden interviews, whatever it is, be hyper aware of how you're feeling at every single moment.

Meaning, am I being present right now or am I telling myself really mean things?

Or am I feeling good because I trust that my heart knows what I need to d'oh and who I need to speak Thio and what I need to say and my trusting in that guidance and feeling good, because I know that when I need that guidance, it'll come to me.

Or am I rationalizing my life away every single minute of the day?

Am I allowing myself to be consumed with thoughts that aren't serving me?

So the more awareness that you bring to yourself in your daily life it's really going to help you in your career.

It's also gonna really what you're gonna notice over time is it's gonna guide you and it can scare you.

You know your heart can scare you at times because it'll eventually edged you two making decisions that maybe for the longest time you were too afraid to make.

So if it's that you need to leave a job that you're not happy with, but you've been holding onto it because you've been rationalizing that you should keep staying there.