Google will know.

Okay, step one: Physical Contact

Do they ever touch or hit you?

Yes, that's a thing she does, like, a lot.

Usually when I've said something hilarious, which is all the time.

But I've seen her doing it to other people, like this one time with this guy Jonathan.

Maybe it's just a "her" thing, and she just does it to everyone.

Okay, that doesn't prove anything.

Two: Acting Differently

Well, how do I know what she's like when I'm not around if I'm never there to see it?

Well, there is this one thing.

When I say something unexpectedly hilarious, and I know it's hilarious because everyone is dying of laughter,

she seems to purposely not laugh and kind of avoids looking at me.

That's something, right?

Number three: Familiarity

Do they share personal information with you?

Do they trust you with secrets?

Yeah!

She tells me weird secrets all the time.

Sometimes I don't even know why she tells me them, but she does.

This is looking good.

Okay, number four: Body Language

Sometimes she ignores me altogether.

Is that body language?

... like lemon juice or a vinaigrette⏤hey, Ashley!

Does that count as body language?

Moving on, number five: Special Attention

Do they take interest in your interests?

Well, this one time, she got me my favorite kind of candy.

I mean, this isn't just any kind of candy, either.

You have to go to a specific part of the city to get it because they don't even make this kind of candy in America.

That has to mean she likes me a little bit, right?

And if she likes me a little, it's enough to ask her if she could like me a lot.

Or I could be wrong, and I could ruin a perfectly good friendship and regret it forever.

Yeah, I'm just gonna eat my candy instead.