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  • Now I thought I'd share some of my favorite,

  • "My Drunk Story" tweets from you guys, here we go.

  • This first one is from @ellenmlauri. She says, "One night I got so drunk at the bar that I stole a girl's birthday crown off her head,

  • went to another bar, and made everyone there buy me birthday drinks."

  • [ Laughter ]

  • It's my special day.

  • My birthday.

  • This one's from @ahskidmore. He says, "One morning my roommate found me passed out on the kitchen floor.

  • The microwave door was open, and I was clutching three raw hot dogs in my hand."

  • [ Laughter ]

  • -You almost got there, dude. -Yeah almost, man.

  • -He almost made it. -Yeah.

  • That's the old college try.

  • [ Laughs ] This one's from @Jordan White 4. She says, "My drunk friends and I ordered an Uber once and the driver texted me,

  • 'I'm here for you.' I texted back, 'OMG that's so sweet.'"

  • [ Laughter ]

  • You're my best friend.

  • I am my best friend.

  • This one's from @buntybaggins.

  • Oh. [ Laughter ]

  • She says, "Once I was so drunk I thought it'd be a brilliant idea to slide across the dance floor on my knees.

  • The floor was rubber, so I came to an immediate stop, skinned my knees, and split my dress."

  • There you go! [ Laughter ]

  • -The trifecta. -Bunty!

  • -How embarrassing was that? -Hee-haw

  • [Grunts]

  • -Wow. -Hold it, Bunty.

  • This one's from @FoggyDew1310.

  • He says, "I once came home at 4 a.m. and showed my ID to my dad at the front door of the house

  • thinking it was another bar."

  • [ Laughter ]

  • [ Laughs ] He was up waiting for him.

  • He didn't even get in that.

  • He didn't even get into his own house.

  • This one's from @maddie_shea524. She says, "This was my search history after a night at the bar."

  • It says max pizza sticks and how to undrunk yourself.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • That's fantastic.

  • Pizza sticks? Never heard of that.

  • This one's from @GreenApple2. He says, "My friend once let me drunkenly crash on his couch. I woke up on the floor

  • of his living room with his 8-year-old son lining up action figures around my body saying. 'Don't wake the giant!'"

  • [ Laughter ]

  • Hey, man.

  • This one is from, uh, @debAURAhhh. She says, "I once drunkenly turned myself in to the lost and found at a baseball game after I went

  • to the restroom during the 7th inning stretch and couldn't remember where my seat was."

  • [ Laughter ]

  • Hi, I-I'm missing. I think I'm missing.

  • Uh, this one is from @thePolishista or thepolishista?

  • Polishista, like maybe she's into nail polish?

  • Polishing? Like Pledge furniture polish?

  • Oh, yeah, man.

  • Yeah thepolishista. Or Polish.

  • She loves Poland.

  • [ Light laughter ] Uh, she says, "I once got so drunk that I began crying when I realized

  • my parakeet had to live his life without hands." [ Laughter ]

  • What?! That's too much.

  • You've had too much.

  • You've had too much to drink, I'm sorry.

  • This one's from @mc 125. She says, "My friend got so drunk one night he went to the tattoo shop

  • across the street and got the name 'Brad' tattooed under his arm so he'd have a Brad Pitt tattoo." [ Laughter ]

  • And that's it. That's it.

  • ♪♪♪♪

  • -Wow. -Brad Pitt.

  • Got a Brad Pitt tattoo.

  • -Absolutley I think. -No.

  • Fantastic.

  • This last one's from @boss hogg57. He says, "I went out with $20. I woke up with $250, a lighter, two phones, and the keys to someone else's car."

  • [ Laughter ]

  • That's a win right there.

  • And there you have it, those are tonight's show hashtags.

  • To check out more of our favorites go to

  • tonightshow.com/hashtags.

Now I thought I'd share some of my favorite,

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Hashtags: #MyDrunkStory

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    Priscilla posted on 2018/12/10
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