"How I Got Dumped" stories from you guys.

Here we go. This first one's from @kyleosmon.

He said...

A girl in middle school cancelled our movie date over voicemail.

My parents heard the message before I did and woke me up to tell me. So essentially my parents broke up with me.

It's like, "What's going on?"

Wake up!

This ones from @ItsNotTheFall.

"It's not the fall"?

Is that a famous thing?

It's not, it's not the fall.

Talking about seasons?

It's not the fall that hurts...

The coffee? The bunk?

The rehab?

I'm thinking skiing. I'm thinking skiing.

Oh, I was thinking falling from grace, yeah.

Oh, you were thinking fall from grace.

Yeah, like, you know, you hit rock bottom,

you have to go to rehab. Something like that, whatever.

-Everything okay, man?

I'm sleeping on my couch in the office.

We'll talk about this later. We shouldn't say this --

shouldn't do it on national television.

This is from @ItsNotTheFall.

She says..

I was waiting for my boyfriend at a restaurant when the waiter came and removed the other chair and place setting.

He said they'd received a phone call and I no longer needed the other setting.

-Oh, come on! -It's not the fall.

-Yeah, not the fall. -Holy moly.

If that ever happened... Wow, wow, wow.

This one's from @notglue.

-Not the fall and not glue.

-Not glue. -That's not glue, dude.

Andrew Karn.

He says...

My girlfriend had a dream she was getting mugged and I wasn't helping her.

She woke up and broke up with me for not defending her...in her dream.

-"I had nothing to do --" -There's other stuff going on.

-This one's from @matadorchick.

-Ooh. Nice. No bull.

-She likes matadors. -Yeah.

-She says...

After a fight, my boyfriend threw up his hands and said, "Well folks, that's the ball game."

What?

That's it.

Well, folks, that's the ball game.

Lates.

This one's from @Ash10G.

She says...

My boyfriend told me he "doesn't have the work ethic" to keep me happy.

-This last one's from @kalsimanmeet.

He says...

My girlfriend asked me how to block someone on WhatsApp.

After I sent the last piece of the instructions, I noticed I wasn't able to send her messages anymore.

There you have it!

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