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  • And I now I thought I'd share some of my favorite

  • "worst first date" stories from you guys.

  • This first one's from @jordancohen2u.

  • She says...

  • I was really into this guy, but I was so nervous on our first date that when he told me, "You smell good,"

  • I replied, "Thanks, I use both of my nostrils."

  • This one's from @annabanana0626.

  • She says...

  • I was walking ahead of him and got into the car parked out front before he could open the door for me.

  • He knocked on the window and yelled through the glass, "This isn't my car!"

  • "It's a Mercedes Benz. I kind of like it."

  • "Whose car is this?"

  • I'll wait.

  • This one's from @foreversmiling2.

  • She says...

  • On my first date, and my first time at a sushi place, I decided to order thirteen rolls.

  • I thought "rolls" meant individual pieces of sushi. The servers had to push two tables together just to hold them all.

  • "13 rolls of sushi."

  • "Well, whatever you say.

  • Bring 'em -- keep bringing 'em."

  • "I've been here before."

  • This one's from @snookicookie16.

  • She says...

  • At the end of the night, he acted like he was going in for a kiss,

  • then put his whole mouth over my nose and blew into it.

  • He laughed and said he does it to his dogs and calls it a "puppy trumpet."

  • Puppy trumpet.

  • Puppy trumpet.

  • What a garbage person.

  • It's my puppy trumpet, man.

  • It said the end of the night, at the end of the date,

  • it was the ol' puppy trumpet.

  • This one's from @Hotovy. Hotovy?

  • He says...

  • The first time I met my wife, she was convinced there were 52 states in the U.S.

  • When I suggested there were only 50 states, she called her brother, who confirmed that there were in fact 52 states.

  • - Never gonna win. - They're married!

  • -You're never gonna win, dude. -He's married.

  • -He learned his lesson early. -Exactly, yeah.

  • This one's from @PatrickAH81.

  • He says...

  • I once spilled soda on my crotch while pulling into my date's driveway.

  • My first words when she answered the door were, "It's not pee."

  • I'm clean. It's not pee.

  • - Yeah, not pee. - All right, well, what is it?

  • It's a little bit of poop.

  • This one's from @lindachilders1.

  • She said...

  • A friend once set me up on a blind date.

  • I wasn't in a great mood because I had received a traffic ticket a few hours before.

  • My day got worse when my blind date turned out to be the cop who gave me the ticket.

  • -Oh! -What!

  • I know you! That's fate!

  • That's fate!

  • Oh, my goodness.

  • This one's from @Mfonda.

  • She says...

  • On our first date, the guy choked on an omelet and blew an onion out of his nose.

  • He could have used the puppy trumpet.

  • That's what you use it for, man.

  • Yeah, that's what you got to get there.

  • That's what you use it for, yeah.

  • Next one is from our very own Questlove.

  • This is very interesting here.

  • He says...

  • I had dinner with Rosario Dawson, and let Mos Def and his bros crash the party.

  • Mos casually order her a $500 birthday cake. It wasn't her birthday.

  • The bill came to $1400. I didn't have $1400.

  • That was it? That was it?

  • That was it.

  • There's only 280 characters. I couldn't go on.

  • Have you ever tried to go on a second date, or no?

  • I didn't get a second date, no.

  • Rosario -- we got to bring this up when she comes on.

  • That's the greatest --

  • Tariq, you have a worst first date story?

  • No, all my first dates, they went swimmingly.

  • -Swimmingly -- swimmingly.

  • Last one here is from @ash10g.

  • She says...

  • We had a mini makeout, then he fist bumped me and said, "Nice work."

  • There you have it.

  • Those are our "Tonight Show Hashtags."

  • To check out more of our favorites,

  • go to tonightshow.com/hashtags.

And I now I thought I'd share some of my favorite

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B1 US TheTonightShow date trumpet puppy sushi pee

Hashtags: #WorstFirstDate

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    Evangeline posted on 2018/11/26
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