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  • [THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

  • [AUDIENCE CHEERING AND APPLAUDING]

  • "Nick Jonas was cute back when he was in the Jonas brothers.

  • And now, he looks like (LAUGHING) a ferret."

  • [AUDIENCE LAUGHING]

  • "Usher seems like he'll stop in the dead ass middle of sex

  • because he got chilly."

  • [AUDIENCE LAUGHING]

  • "P!nk makes music for obnoxious white bridal parties

  • that drunkenly walk into a Denny's and (LAUGHING)

  • ruin everyone's evening."

  • [AUDIENCE LAUGHING]

  • I would have said Waffle House, but whatever.

  • "Watching Alice Cooper, and all I can think of

  • is that he looks like a ball sack with face paint on."

  • [AUDIENCE LAUGHING]

  • Well, that's fair.

  • "The Lumineers are the musical equivalent to a triple venti

  • half sweet iced caramel macchiato.

  • [BLEEP] them and this."

  • [AUDIENCE LAUGHING]

  • "Common is the Pottery Barn of rappers."

  • [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] What the [BLEEP] you know about rappers?

  • "Like honestly, saying Blink-182 is

  • your favorite band is like saying I'm OK

  • (LAUGHING) living with herpes."

  • [AUDIENCE LAUGHING]

  • "Used anti-frizz shampoo on my pubes,

  • and now my penis (LAUGHING) looks like Steve Aoki."

  • [AUDIENCE LAUGHING]

  • "Waterfalls by TLC has to be the worst

  • song about waterfalls ever."

  • [INAUDIBLE]

  • That's-- you know what, that's just

  • some like natural earth bitch, you know what I'm saying?

  • That said that.

  • "Fallout Boy is the Comic Sans MS of music--

  • they're both (LAUGHING) entirely overused."

  • [AUDIENCE LAUGHING]

  • "Zendaya's skinny A-F. Damn, looking like

  • a (LAUGHING) whole spaghetti."

  • [AUDIENCE LAUGHING]

  • That's awesome!

  • That's awesome.

  • "I'd rather be homeless and watch two cats bang in an alley

  • than to go to a Ludacris concert."

  • [AUDIENCE LAUGHING]

  • "Adam Levine is if a flaccid penis could kind of sing."

  • Bro.

  • This is riddled with mistakes.

  • [AUDIENCE LAUGHING]

  • "Niall Horan is ugly.

  • Good night, everyone."

  • [AUDIENCE LAUGHING]

  • "Erykah Badu tits look like [BLEEP]."."

  • [AUDIENCE LAUGHING]

  • [CHUCKLES] I had three babies. - "LOL.

  • Meghan Trainor looks like that girl my parents would force me

  • to listen to If I were white."

  • [AUDIENCE LAUGHING AND GROANING]

  • "If you're a guy and you're listening

  • to Depeche Mode, reach into your vagina

  • and pull your balls back down."

  • [AUDIENCE LAUGHING AND APPLAUDING]

  • "I left more talent in my toilet

  • this morning than Green Day has ever had.

  • Green Day sucks [BLEEP]."

  • [AUDIENCE LAUGHING]

  • I'm glad that you're thinking about us

  • while you're taking dumps.

  • We're doing something right.

  • We'll think about you while we're sucking [BLEEP]..

  • [AUDIENCE LAUGHING AND APPLAUDING]

  • [THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

  • Congratulations on making it to the end of a YouTube video.

  • Why not celebrate by clicking the Subscribe button?

  • You earned it.

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

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