Name: 【TED】Maz Jobrani: A Saudi, an Indian and an Iranian walk into a Qatari bar... !
Uploaded: 2013-03-06T05:47:14.000Z
Duration: 7 min 12 s
Description: Thousands of YouTube videos with English-Chinese subtitles! Now you can learn to understand native speakers, expand your vocabulary, and improve your pronunciation...

Gerund

I love coming to Doha. It's such an international place.

This is like -- it feels like the United Nations just here.

You land at the airport, and you're welcomed by an Indian lady

who takes you to Al Maha Services, where you meet a Filipino lady

who hands you off to a South African lady

who then takes you to a Korean who takes you to

who takes you to the car with a Sri Lankan.

You go to the hotel and you check in. There's a Lebanese.

Yeah? And then a Swedish guy showed me my room.

I said, "Where are the Qataris?" (Laughter)

They said, "No, no, it's too hot. They come out later. They're smart."

And of course it's growing so fast, sometimes there's growing pains.

You know, like sometimes you run into people that you think

know the city well, but they don't know it that well.

and I asked him to take me to the Sheraton,

I said, "What's wrong?"He said, "One problem, sir."

I go, "You're the driver, you should know."He goes, "No, I just arrived, sir."

I go, "You just arrived at the W?""No, I just arrived in Doha, sir.

I was on my way home from the airport. I got a job.

"Neither do I. It will be an adventure, sir."

It is an adventure. The Middle East has been an adventure the past couple years.

The Middle East is going crazy with the Arab Spring

and revolution and all this. Are there any Lebanese here tonight?

Any Lebanese by applause? (Applause) Lebanese.

when Lebanon is the most peaceful place in the region.

No. There's serious issues in the region.

Some people don't want to talk about them. I'm here to talk about them tonight.

here's a serious issue. When we see each other,

when we say hello, how many kisses are we going to do?

Every country is different and it's confusing, okay?

In Lebanon, they do three. In Egypt, they do two.

I went to Egypt. I went to say hello to this one Egyptian guy,

I went, one, two. I went for three. He wasn't into it.

I told him, I said, "No, no, no, I was just in Lebanon."

He goes, "I don't care where you were. You just stay where you are, please. Just stay where you are."

I went to Saudi Arabia. In Saudi Arabia, they go one, two,

and then they stay on the same side -- three, four, five, six,

seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18.

Next time you see a Saudi, look closely. They're just a little bit tilted.

"Abdul, are you okay?""Yeah, I was saying hello for half an hour.

Why is that? Are you too tired to go all the way around?

"Habibi, it's so hot. Just come here for a second. Say hello.

Hello, Habibi. Just don't move. Just stay there please.

Every country — Iranians, sometimes we do two, sometimes we do three.

A friend of mine explained to me, before the '79 revolution,

So with Iranians, you can tell whose side the person is on

based on the number of kisses they give you.

Yeah, if you go one, two, three -- "I can't believe you support this regime

But no, guys, really, it is exciting to be here,

and like I said, you guys are doing a lot culturally,

you know, and it's amazing, and it helps change the image

of the Middle East in the West. Like a lot of Americans

don't know a lot about us, about the Middle East.

I'm Iranian and American. I'm there. I know, I've traveled here.

People don't know we laugh. When I did the Axis of Evil comedy tour,

it came out on Comedy Central, I went online

to see what people were saying about it. I ended up on a conservative website.

One guy wrote another guy. He said, "I never knew these people laughed."

Think about it. You never see us laughing in American film or television, right?

Maybe like an evil -- like, "Wuhahaha, wuhahaha. (Laughter)

I will kill you in the name of Allah, wuhahahahaha."

But never like, "ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha."

We like to laugh. We like to celebrate life.

And I wish more Americans would travel here. I always encourage my friends:

Travel, see the Middle East, there's so much to see, so many good people.

And it's vice versa, and it helps stop problems

of misunderstanding and stereotypes from happening.

For example, I don't know if you heard about this,

a little while ago in the U.S. there was a Muslim family

talking about the safest place to sit on the plane.

Some passengers overheard them, somehow misconstrued

that as terrorist talk, got them kicked off the plane.

It was a family, a mother, father, child, walking down the aisle,

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【TED】Maz Jobrani: A Saudi, an Indian and an Iranian walk into a Qatari bar... !

walk

airplane

safest

plane