- It changes you.

- [Ned] Don't you punch my weiner!

(children yelling)

- I am so overwhelmed.

(laughing)

(lively jazz music)

We're here, we're doing it, today we're raising kids!

- So I'm gonna be raising someone else's child for a day.

- Oh, good luck.

(laughing) - I don't know what to think.

- You're not qualified.

(laughs)

- So what was I like as a toddler?

- Complete pain in the ass.

- [Eugene's Dad] You were daydreaming every day.

- When you were two and you were three,

you were really strong-willed.

- Me and my wife are pretty close to having children.

- I'm still not so good at taking care of myself.

- I'm not the most fond of babies.

- It'll be fun, I'm a boy, I get along with boys.

I mean look at all these toys.

We're gonna have a great time.

(crying) - Uh-oh.

- It's tiring.

- You're losing sleep.

- Every day is new.

- It's like having a tornado for a pet.

- There he goes. - I have to go for that one.

- It's like taking care of your drunk friend.

- My name is David, I have a 14-month-old son Isadore.

- You're a rockst-- ow!

- Anything that he is not supposed to get, he wants.

- Hey, what did you just find on this?

Yeah, not good, dude.

Dominik is 22 months, just turned it.

- Oh it's in his, it's in his mouth.

(laughing)

Just really going at it, just really chewing it.

- This is a two-year-old.

- Woah, woah, woah, hey, hey!

- Good catch!

Better dad than me.

So this is Oskar, and then I have a 7-week-old at home.

He did say at one point he wanted to throw him

in the trash can.

(screaming, crying)

- Dex, don't take a book from a baby sweetheart,

for what I consider to be obvious reasons.

(yells)

- So this is your life?

- This is Odysseus, he's one, Ajax is four,

and Rex is six, six and a half.

- What's it like to be a dad?

- It's constantly-- (baby screams)

Constant chaos.

- When you have a kid, you sign up for stress.

- As soon as they get to like, 10 months, that's

when they start crawling, and that's crazy town.

- He's like a wild little beast.

(children yelling)

- Yeah.

- I couldn't get anything done with these three.

- You don't get anything done!

I mean you go to sleep at 1:30 or 2:00, you get up at 5:30.

You've seen me, you know me.

How do I get, I don't know?

- So I'm gonna, I guess sort of reverse Asian this

and be the adoptive father?

- Hello Oskar, I'm Ned.

- So I'm your dad now.

- I'll be hanging out with you today.

Does that sound like a good time?

- Uh-uh.

- No.

- You're not gonna like, throw up on me, are ya?

- Dominik, come here! - Dom, wait, Dom, come back.

- Dragging the baby was never in any of my parenting books.

- (chuckling) He's tripped six times in the last ten steps.

(humming)

- Do you think Ned's boring?

(laughing)

- (laughing) There he goes again!

- Do children often try to just get away?

- That one does, yeah.

(laughing)

- Now why doesn't Ned try to tickle?

(laughing)

- Fetch!

- Alright, well, it looks like you have

your work cut out for you, Ned.

- Is it rude for me to say I want out?

- Do you think I'm gonna do well?

- Uhh, wouldn't say.

(laughs)

- It's daddy time!

My main goal today is just to make sure

that the kid doesn't die.

- Make sure nobody chokes to death.

I've never choked to death, so I'm an expert.

- My strengths today are

I've got a lot of energy, I'm ready to go,

and my weaknesses are I don't know anything.

- Hello!

- I'll knock.

- Hey! - Hello!

- Can you say hi to Ned?

- Hi, Ned.

- This is your domain, you can be daddy now.

- I am daddy.

- You basically just keep him alive.

- He needs a change, this is what he wore to sleep.

- Hopefully I don't (bleep) this up.

- He does repeat things, so watch out.

- Okay.

- Good luck. - Thank you.

- You're a dad to me, I will be in the other room.

Boys, entertain him!

- I will, um, figure out what to do with you, Dom.

- Where's daddy?

- Oh, see, already hates me.

Already doesn't wanna stay with me.

Off to a great start.

Oh, I should take care of this kid, alright,

(bleep) ouch.

Oh, (bleep)!

Oh my god I keep saying it!

(laughing)

Okay, I'm not gonna, whoo!

- I was the youngest of three boys,

but I've never dealt with the chaos

that was my own childhood dynamic.

- Alright, I'm your dad today.

Could we put down the screen, Ajax?

- He still isn't of the age where you can reason with him.

- Dom, where'd you go?

- Hey, Ajax, Ajax!

- Dom!

- Your dad's, I'm your dad now, and screen time's over,

I don't know where you're going.

- Okay lets, do you take your own shirt off?

Or, do you want me to help you or what?

- Book.

- Butts?

- Dom, wait for me.

Dom, Dom, Dom.

- Ajax, where are you at?

Ajax, we don't need the cupcake tin.

What, here, why are you opening this?

- Underwear goes off, okay.

And now we got Star Wars.

Oh, can't run around naked!

- Hit this, not me.

No, no, not me!

(clattering)

- I'm gonna eat.

- You okay over there Ajax?

- Follow me.

(clicks tongue)

Oh wait, no, that's what you do to a dog.

- [Ari] Alright, baby's up, let's go meet that baby.

- The baby's awake?

It's time to add another child to this

because I'm in too much control!

I need to go take care of your brother.

And then, can you guys, do you guys wanna

Should we give them a screen for a minute?

What do you do?

You got five minutes of screen time, how's that sound?

- Great!

- Try not to kill each other while I'm gone.

- We're gonna kill each other?

- Yeah, don't.

- Why?

- I feel like that's a pretty obvious reason.

Hey, who's this?

It's a stranger!