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  • Hello this is Andrea Cairella Licensed Professional Counselor and Relationship Consultant on True

  • Potential TV the place where you can nurture your relationship, transform your life, and

  • enhance your wellbeing. Today we will be talking about pre-marital counseling and pre marriage

  • questions. Getting married can be an exciting yet anxiety

  • provoking step in one's life as they go from being an "I" to a "we." Today I will be sharing

  • pre-marital counseling and 8 pre marriage questions all couples should discuss with

  • their partner before getting married. ROLES AND RESPONSIBILITIES: Imagine how you

  • plan on dividing chores and responsibilities. Will you both work? Who will stay at home

  • if you have children? What does marriage mean to you? Will the rules change and if so how?

  • CHILDREN: Talk about your opinions on children and share important childhood experiences

  • with your partner. Do you want to have any, and if so, how many? When will you start trying?

  • If we were infertile and are unable to have children, how would we handle that? How would

  • you discipline? Agree on basic parenting styles. If you are blending families, determine how

  • you will handle parental responsibilities. Will the stepparent have the same authority?

  • How do you feel about each other's role in the discipline and decision-making regarding

  • each child? SEX: Determine sexual goals. How often would

  • you like to have sex? It might seem strange to talk about it now, but it's important to

  • be ready for the sexual problems that can occur in long-term relationships. Discuss

  • how to deal with potential sex issues and how to keep things passionate and interesting.

  • SPIRITUALITY: Ask each other if you are spiritual or religious and share which practices are

  • important to you. For example, do you regularly attend church or temple weekly or just on

  • religious holidays? Are you atheist or agnostic? Are you more spiritual in nature and what

  • does that look like? If you have children, what spiritual practices would you like to

  • share with them? FINANCES: Be forthcoming about who will be

  • responsible for paying the bills or how you will share expenses. Address how to organize

  • the budget and how financial decisions will be made. If your expectation is to work on

  • these matters together, make sure your partner understands that and that you are both upfront

  • about your finances. Do either of you have debt, student loans or a bad credit history?

  • How will these financial issues be addressed? CAREER: What do your career goals and aspirations

  • entail? Address your own life goals and individual plans. Do you desire starting your own business

  • or going back to school? Make sure this is a plan that your partner will support and

  • that both of you are free to pursue individual interests and dreams.

  • LOCATION: Address where you would like to live. Is living close to family and friends

  • important to you, what about where you would like to raise your children?

  • If you are in a cross-cultural relationship, are from two different regions or are assigned

  • overseas for work often, having these conversations is important to have, so you know how flexible

  • both you and your partner are, what additional supports need to be in place to help with

  • adjustment or if it is aligned with one's personal and professional goals and lifestyle.

  • LEISURE ACTIVITIES: How do you like to spend your free time? Determine your interests and

  • values that are important to you and share them with your partner. Which activities and

  • interests do you plan to share with one another and how much quality time do you plan on investing

  • in the relationship? Now I'd love to hear from you. What pre marriage

  • questions are most important to you? Do you see the benefit of premarital counseling before

  • getting married? Share your stories, tips and suggestions. Interesting insights and

  • conversations always happens after the episode at TruePotentialCounseling.com so join in

  • on the chat and leave a comment now. Did you like this video? If so, subscribe to my channel

  • by clicking the link below so you don't miss any future episodes. If you liked it, like

  • it and share it with your friends. And if you can't get enough and you want additional

  • resources to transform your life and create a nurturing and passionate relationship, plus

  • some personal insights that I only share in email, go over to TruePotentialCounseling.com

  • and sign up for email updates now. Thank you so much and I will catch you next

  • time on True Potential TV.

Hello this is Andrea Cairella Licensed Professional Counselor and Relationship Consultant on True

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