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  • - On this episode I have a guest!

  • (bouncy music)

  • You ask questions, and I answer them.

  • This is The #AskGaryVee Show.

  • Hey everybody, this is Gary Vay-ner-chuk,

  • and this is episode 72 of The #AskGaryVee Show.

  • Or should I say, The Ask Gary and Casey Show.

  • That's right, for the first time ever,

  • you know 72 is such a symbolic number

  • that I figured we would use that to break out

  • the multiple person #AskGaryVee Show.

  • So, Case, thanks for you being the first person ever.

  • - Happy to be here, happy to be here,

  • ready for some questions.

  • - Why don't you tell the VaynerNation a little bit,

  • you know, let's call it a 72 second version

  • of who you are for the few who don't know,

  • and then we'll just get right into the questions.

  • - Okay, who I am for those who don't know.

  • I live in New York City, I work in New York City,

  • this is one of my offices, one of my companies.

  • I'm mostly known as a film maker,

  • I love making movies on the internet,

  • but I also do a lot of advertising work

  • for companies like J.Crew, and Nike, and Mercedes Benz,

  • and I also work with other companies

  • like The New York Times, making films for them.

  • How was that, was that good?

  • - That's great.

  • - I'm the father of two, I like to skateboard,

  • and yeah, that's...

  • - I mean the bottom line is, let's put it this way,

  • DRock is so excited right now that I can barely

  • deal with the tension in the room.

  • - Just try to hold the camera still.

  • - And so, you know, please go down the rabbit hole

  • that is Casey, he's an incredible storyteller,

  • and for me a lot of you know that I love talking

  • about market in the year that you actually live in,

  • this is a filmmaker, storyteller

  • in the year that we actually live in,

  • while a lot of his contemporaries,

  • and people of his talent have not recognized

  • the world we actually live in.

  • You've been one of the few that has in my opinion,

  • and for whatever that's worth, so that's how I see it.

  • - I'll take it Gary.

  • - Cool, let's get into the show.

  • - [Voiceover] Joe asks, "What advice would you give

  • "a high school senior in America

  • "trying to decide whether to go to college,

  • "and if so, which one?"

  • - Joe I'm gonna let Casey answer this first,

  • just cause I think it'd be fun to have

  • you start off the show.

  • - Yeah no, I've got a strong feeling

  • about further education, which is that

  • I think in life you should only be doing two things ever,

  • and one is like discovering what your passion is,

  • and then two is realizing it.

  • So Joe, if you know what you want to do,

  • and you're convicted that's where you want to be in life,

  • and that trajectory does not necessitate

  • a college education, then skip it.

  • Chances are you don't know what you want to do,

  • otherwise you wouldn't be asking us this question,

  • and if you don't know what you want to do

  • your responsibility is to figure that out,

  • and college is one of the best places,

  • one of the best atmospheres, environments

  • you can be in to figure out what your calling is in life,

  • to figure out what your passion is, what your purpose is.

  • - Joe, I'm gonna jump in here,

  • as the cars are racing outside,

  • and say this, I agree with a ton of what Casey said,

  • I'll also add that if you're taking $200,000 in debt

  • to find your passion, that might be a practical kind of,

  • by the way, debt that you can't even

  • declare bankruptcy against, which complete,

  • I mean, I can't even, I'm suffocated

  • by the game, the AK racket that is student loans,

  • and today in today's environment,

  • things that you and I didn't have.

  • There are other places where young people congregate,

  • and pound into each other in the serendipity

  • of finding those mentors, or contemporaries

  • that allow people to discover.

  • So look, I think one thing for sure,

  • it's fun, entrepreneur, I look at you

  • as an entrepreneurial artist, but I look at you

  • way more artistic than I me.

  • So, call it entrepreneur, artist,

  • boy there's a lot of rationale in the 2015 world

  • where college is not the right answer,

  • and I think, you know what's really been unique to me, Joe,

  • is I'm gonna give you a weird answer.

  • I acctually find that there's an enormous amount of kids,

  • and I'm spending a lot of time on this topic

  • since I was a shit student, and have made

  • something of myself, that a lot of kids

  • are still just going to college,

  • just making that decision on not wanting

  • to disappoint their parents, and that to me

  • is maybe the most fascinating thing goin' on

  • is that father of five and a two year old

  • living on the Upper East Side with elite private schools

  • where I'm paying college tuition for kindergarten already,

  • it's been funny to me, cause I'm really poking

  • and prodding the parents that are

  • my new contemporaries to see how much pressure,

  • and they have not switched yet.

  • The reason I keep talking about college

  • in a world where a lot of my friends talk about its demise

  • as more of a 20 year thing than a 10 year thing

  • is cause I still think parents of my generation

  • still value it too much for their own self esteem.

  • They want to say their kids went to Stanford,

  • and Harvard, and things of that nature.

  • So look, you've got to make your own decision,

  • but I'm with you, like discovering it,

  • and then I'd be curious, now I'm like mixing up the show,

  • what do you think about this based on your answer.

  • Because your answer is my answer,

  • and there's one other part that I'm trying to figure out.

  • I'm a big fan of practicality.

  • I think you and I got lucky that not only

  • were we able to figure out our passion,

  • but we actually had some level of talent within it.

  • There's a lot of people, a lot of the people

  • that go and try out for American Idol,

  • or the wannabe NBA players.

  • What's your point of view on Joe

  • figuring out his passion is to paint,

  • but he sucks shit at it?

  • - Well, you know, I think that

  • anyone's life, your world always shrinks

  • and expands in proportion to your willingness

  • to take risk, or try new things.

  • And that's why I think that like an academic environment

  • is a great place for trying new things

  • and experimenting with new things.

  • So, if your passion is painting,

  • and you're a terrible painter,

  • then maybe being in an environment like college

  • will open your eyes to something like graphic design

  • which doesn't involve a paint brush,

  • but you can make a great living at it,

  • and you're realizing an artistic passion

  • that is certainly inline with painting.

  • - Do you think that then one needs

  • to be challenged to make sure they go

  • into the funnel of college to recognize

  • they're not there to check those boxes?

  • Because the way you play the game

  • actually has as much to do with the game, right.

  • If you hack college in the way that you're talking about it,

  • you know, now you're starting to think about,

  • you know, course selection, you're talking about

  • the kind of group of friends that you're spending time with.

  • - Yeah, but I think college is,

  • can be a total waste of time and money

  • if not approached carefully, and I think a lot of kids today

  • go there for a lot of the wrong reasons

  • like what you're suggesting, and certainly if there

  • are better, other opportunities

  • that feel better to you than college,

  • I think now today, those opportunities are...

  • - Way more practical.

  • - Are as practical as an academic education.

  • I can tell you that a big falsehood

  • is that by going to college, you will get something else.

  • You will find success.

  • And one thing that's becoming more and more true,

  • especially as technology is opening up

  • all new means of transmission of information,

  • is that if there were a defined path to success,

  • especially in any sort of creative endeavor,

  • everyone would just follow that defined path.

  • There is no defined path.

  • And college can be a great way

  • to help you find one of those paths,

  • but it is certainly not the only way,

  • and it's certainly not a guarantee

  • that you'll find that trajectory.

  • - Yep, let's move on.

  • - [Voiceover] Andrzej asks, "How do you keep aim

  • "on your goals, and separate yourself from

  • "the demands of the external world?"

  • - Andrzej, I'll take this one first.

  • You know, I don't know what to tell you

  • other than it's unbelievable for me

  • how much the external world has not factored

  • into my decision making, I've talked about,

  • if you've been watching this show long enough

  • that first F on a test in fourth grade

  • and literally making that transition

  • to I'm gonna fight the market,

  • and I've been fighting the market my whole life.

  • I think for me, it was the level of self esteem

  • that my mom instilled in me, plus some level

  • of my own DNA, I think that's the friction at hand.

  • Heck, a lot of the themes of our last question were on this,

  • right, like what does the market want you to do,

  • whether that's your parents or society,

  • versus what you want to do.

  • For me, it has a lot to do with intestinal fortitude.

  • A Gorilla Monsoon WWF reference.

  • You know, I think it's surrounding yourself with people

  • that give you permission to take that risk.

  • That to me is the most practical version

  • of what I'm giving you,

  • other than you've got to be born with it.

  • It's finding those like minded people

  • who are taking those similar risks,

  • and give you, through their own actions,

  • a little more umph, or if you're amazingly lucky

  • to have that parental, or mentor infrastructure above you

  • that created that context.

  • Case.

  • - I think focus is everything.

  • I think that you can do 10 things poorly,

  • or one thing well, and saying, "No,"

  • is something that I only learned late in my career.

  • - I still suck at it.

  • I still suck at it right now.

  • - Saying, "No," is so hard, but the truth is

  • like we're surrounded by leeches,

  • blood suckers, and vampires, and those are people

  • that want to take, take, take, and they don't give back,

  • and learning to say, "No," to those people,

  • learning to say, "No," to all those distractions

  • is the only way to get anywhere.

  • Cause time is finite, life is short.

  • Quickly you find things in life that are really incredible,

  • like family, things that you love,

  • things that you're passionate about

  • that might distract you in a positive way

  • from your career focus.

  • So, you have to learn to shed everything else.

  • - I'm gonna throw a little bit of a curve ball.

  • I get so much happiness out of doing things for people

  • who would be, you know, categorized

  • as the way you just broke it down

  • because I have a weird gear inside of me

  • that has zero expectation for the return

  • on someone's selfishness.

  • I know that's a little bit of a mouthful,

  • but it's just, it's probably why

  • I'm so ridiculously happy.

  • I have such little expectation for the return,

  • it makes me happy to do the give,

  • I sit in front of you knowing I will accomplish

  • less in my career, and amass less wealth,

  • and a lot of other things, less time with my family,

  • which is my number one because I get so much happiness

  • out of some of those actions.

  • So, I would tell you if you're in a rare group like myself,

  • make sure you recognize, in a world where people

  • will tell you that you're a sucker for doing it,

  • or things of that nature, you still got

  • to make yourself happy, but I will tell you,

  • I'm way happier than I was five years ago

  • because I have grown in my no meter moving a ton.

  • It hasn't gone to zero, and I think a lot of people

  • close themselves out of serendipity

  • by saying no too much, right, and I think we've probably

  • both benefited through our years of the yes

  • when it didn't make sense on paper.

  • But I'm with you man, I mean I made a video

  • a long time ago that, The Yes Virus.

  • It's like the sickness of just saying, "Yes," all the time,

  • and it's a tough one.

  • - Yeah, I mean, I've made movies,

  • I made a movie that's Just Say Yes,

  • like I believe in saying, "Yes,"

  • I believe in embracing risk, and embracing chance,

  • and all the things that...

  • - Do you think you need to say, "No,"

  • more as you get older?

  • - I just think it's a learning curve,

  • a very steep learning curve to understand

  • when no is appropriate and when yes is appropriate,

  • and until you learn that, you default to yes.

  • - It's a really, really, or no,

  • my dad defaults to no.

  • I think you and I, like we have some similarities

  • that makes, like I think there's a lot of people there

  • that default to no, I think there's

  • a lot of people that default.

  • My dad's opening words are, "Hey dad."

  • "No."

  • Like I can't, "I was gonna say how was your day?"

  • You know, like no is not a proper.

  • Like, I know a lot of people that default into no.

  • I think we happen to be surrounded

  • by a lot of people that default into yes.

  • - Yeah, lucky us.

  • - But I think, you know it'll be interesting,

  • you know what actually,

  • quick little side question of the day,

  • give me are you a default yes or no person?

  • I'm just curious for my own kind of like polling.

  • India, move it along.

  • - [Voiceover] CJ asks, "How has having a family

  • "changed your long term view of work?

  • "And what does retirement mean to you?"

  • - CJ asked a good question.

  • I'll let you go, cause I know you're

  • a new father of a second.

  • - Yeah, so what does family have to do with work?

  • I think family is the ultimate cheat,

  • and what I mean by that is I had a kid

  • when I was 16, I've always had a family

  • since I was an adult,

  • my entire adult life I've had a family,

  • and it gives you a reason to do all this work,

  • and that downtrodden feeling you can have,

  • which is like, "Why am I doing this?

  • "Why am working another night til three in the morning?"

  • When you have family, for me, it gives me my purpose,

  • my reason for doing everything I do is my family.

  • Part two retirement, retirement's my biggest fear.

  • Retirement is what people do when they wait to die.

  • My grandmother was a tap dancer,

  • and she had a tap dance school,

  • and she taught tap everyday of her life,

  • and she taught tap on a Friday,

  • and she died on a Monday when she was 92.

  • That's my fantasy.

  • I want to work until the last minute,

  • I want to be working in my hospital bed as I'm dying.

  • So, that's how I feel about retirement.

  • - I'll start with retirement, I'm you know,

  • in the complete same camp.

  • You know, that is my nightmare.

  • I want to die on Monday, on the Monday that I'm working.

  • I didn't need those two days in between.

  • You know, I'm with you I think, you know look,

  • I will say this, there's one weird

  • retirement fantasy I have,

  • which is to be an old man sitting

  • at the racetrack, having some nickname

  • like one eyed Gary, and like betting on the ponies.

  • I do like the notion of the ponies as an old man,

  • so there's a little bit of that.

  • You know, the family, work life balance whole thing

  • I think is completely counter punching.

  • Meaning, I hate giving an answer to this

  • because I think it really is predicated on your partner,

  • and then the evolution of your kids.

  • My partner part I really kind of took care of.

  • I mean, I was looking for Lizzie,

  • when I found her, I locked her up,

  • married her immediately, we were married

  • within the year of meeting.

  • I told her on our first date that we were getting married.

  • I knew that she was independent enough

  • and could, I intuitively felt that she could

  • handle the insanity that is me.

  • It's crazy, I feel like we're still dating.

  • Because you know I travel so much,

  • and like I'm busy, but like it's just over communication.

  • When I see a little strain, I'll cancel a trip,

  • I won't say yes, you know, I try to hack,

  • the kids are a whole new variable.

  • You know, now that Misha's five and a half,

  • I've got to get ready for:

  • They may not be like Lizzie.

  • You know, my little Xander might want me

  • at every single thing at every moment.

  • So, I'm starting to get mentally prepared

  • to counter punch their reality.

  • Kids are always going to want their parents around,

  • but what's the hack, right.

  • Like, do I, like it's funny, I've been traveling,

  • and where I speak now, I spoke in Anaheim

  • and I noticed that Disneyland was right next door,

  • so I'm like, "Maybe I'll do these speaking engagements

  • "cause I'll take the kids, let them see what dad does,

  • "and then a full day of..."

  • So, it's interesting how my brain

  • is starting to adjust to:

  • What's their reality gonna be like?

  • So, my answer to your question

  • is counter punching, what I mean by that

  • is gross over communicating.

  • Having those conversations with your spouse

  • or with your partner, having those conversations

  • maybe even at an early age with your children.

  • - [Voiceover] Shay asks, "Think back to a time

  • "when you pissed someone off.

  • "How badly did you piss them off,

  • "and what did you do to make up for it?"

  • - This is a really interesting question.

  • - I work so hard not to piss people off.

  • - Oh man, me too.

  • I'm like suffocated by pissing someone off.

  • I'll take this, pissing someone off.

  • So look, I mean the only time I'm truly ever affected,

  • ever, by pissing someone off is when I piss myself off.

  • So, it's a little bit of a wrinkle, meaning

  • I am so aggressive to try not to piss off anyone,

  • that the second I taste in the water that I did

  • I start hedging like a hog.

  • You know, like I start like really,

  • did you get that Sonic Hedgehog, good alright,

  • you got it (mumbles).

  • I'm in full apology mode immediately.

  • The only time I even am comfortable

  • pissing people off is on stage

  • when I'm challenging the audience

  • to the quid pro quo, so I'm,

  • on a one to one basis, I'm crippled

  • by hurting someone's feelings, and the second

  • that I sense it, I start backtracking.

  • So, the way I answer, the way I fix it

  • is by immediately taking the gas off the pedal,

  • cause I don't like that feeling.

  • I think there's other ways to manipulate my point.

  • That's the truth, I truly think that I can

  • drive home my point through honey, not vinegar.

  • - Yeah, I agree, I mean there's no worse feeling

  • than upsetting someone else.

  • And that said, because I have a very specific image

  • in my mind when I think of pissing someone off.

  • But I can tell you that living life

  • where you pander to other people

  • to make sure you never have enemies

  • or never have anyone dislike you

  • is a very dangerous game to play,

  • and I've always said with my work

  • that I'd rather, if 100 people see

  • a movie I make, I would rather have

  • 50 people love and 50 people hate it

  • than have 100 people go, "Eh."

  • So, it's a fine line in that idea of pissing someone off

  • can mean so many different things.

  • The last time somebody walked away from me angry

  • I honestly can't remember, but the last time

  • I read the YouTube comments on any one of my videos

  • and they were 100% positive,

  • well there was never that last time,

  • cause I don't think that's ever happened.

  • - Yeah, I mean, that just made me think of Linkedin.

  • Boy, does the conservative business world hate

  • where I'm coming from.

  • You know, it's funny, I'm sure a lot of people

  • are watching right now and saying,

  • "What?"

  • My living is being in the minority

  • on my points of view, on the current state

  • of marketing and all that stuff,

  • but I'm with you, like on a one to one basis, never.

  • As little as possible, to the masses, no problem.

  • And I think that's an interesting insight.

  • - Yeah, I think so, cause as a human being

  • the ambition is to never piss someone else off,

  • or to leave someone else upset,

  • but as far as a belief system. - For sure.

  • - The belief system has to be uniquely yours,

  • even if that's a divisive...

  • - I will also say I'm in the sport sense,

  • like in competition, I'm very interested

  • in pissing people off.

  • I'm, you know, it matters to me a lot,

  • like nothing excites me more than if I know

  • somebody's upset because I did something positive

  • for my team versus theirs.

  • It's extremely interesting to me to piss people off

  • during the heat of battle because I want to get

  • them emotional and off their game.

  • - Yeah.

  • - Yeah, alright, let's move on.

  • - [Voiceover] Hamms asks, "If you could have

  • "a bionic body part, which body part would it be,

  • "and what powers would it have?"

  • - The truth is I do have a bionic body part.

  • My right leg from the knee to the hip,

  • and then the hip all the way in

  • is made out of titanium.

  • - I didn't know that.

  • - Yeah, most people don't.

  • And the super power that it gives me

  • I think I can make this, but when I was in the hospital,

  • my leg broken in like, literally, 27 places,

  • and they were hammering it back together

  • made out of metal, the doctor said to me,

  • "You know, you'll never run again.

  • "You'll be able to like catch up with a taxi cab,

  • "but you will never run again."

  • And I was 26 years old, and that is a tough thing

  • for a 26 year old to hear, especially someone

  • as physical as I am.

  • So, the superpower that it gave me

  • was prior to that,

  • prior to getting my bionic limb,

  • I wasn't much of an athlete or a runner,

  • but since getting my metal leg,

  • I've run 22 marathons, and four IRONMAN Triathlons,

  • and countless other races, and I'm a much fitter,

  • faster person since getting my bionic leg.

  • So it has, I do have a bionic limb,

  • and I do have a superpower.

  • - I also have a bionic limb that no,

  • no I don't, I really wanted one though, I'm pissed.

  • - I was excited to hear what limb,

  • what you were gonna go with.

  • - You know what, I would go with ears.

  • I'm not joking, I'm very intrigued

  • by the notion of like, I love picking up senses right,

  • and for some reason, so one of the things

  • that I think I do extremely well is I,

  • that I really enjoy being able to do,

  • and I'd love to do more of, which is why

  • I'm going with ears, is I am often

  • at a dinner table, or at a conference,

  • having a conversation fully in it,

  • and capable of listening to the two or three

  • other side conversations, as a matter of fact,

  • often when I talk to a small group

  • of 40 or 50 people, I will use side whispering

  • of what I just said to incorporate into my talk,

  • and then look at the person, and they're always freaked out,

  • because I was so focusing going here,

  • but I heard them, and so I think people

  • don't listen enough. That's a big thesis of mine.

  • It's my overall social media thesis,

  • and so I'm gonna go with ears.

  • - I'm just picturing Gary with gigantic, titanium

  • - It's like metal ears.

  • - ears that turn and respond to people.

  • - Case, one of the things we do on this show,

  • I didn't tell you, but I'm sure you're busy doing your thing

  • is we get to ask a question of the day

  • of the VaynerNation, I know you're not prepped,

  • and so that makes it even more fun for me,

  • but I'm just trying to talk a little longer

  • to give you a couple seconds.

  • - I appreciate it.

  • - You get to ask them any question you like.

  • We're gonna end this show with you asking

  • the VaynerNation, VaynerNation please,

  • our first ever guest, so get in.

  • Lurkers, this is a good time to come out.

  • Please ask your question of the day.

  • - Sure, I have like a two part question,

  • if it's already been asked, forgive me,

  • but it's something I'm always curious about,

  • but what is your greatest fear and why?

  • Is that too generic? That's a good question right?

  • - No, thats good. I've never asked that.

  • - Yeah, great. - And so we're excited.

  • Thank you my friend. - This was great.

  • - This was a lot of fun. - I hope I get invited back.

  • - We'll see, I don't know what the rule is on two...

  • - Write in the comments, "Invite Casey back."

  • - That's a good point.

  • - I'll be back on 144 right.

  • - Yeah, I could, I like the doubling up.

  • What about 720?

  • I don't think we're gonna go that long.

  • I'm leaving that for them to say,

  • "Please do it that long."

  • That's me like fishing for compliments.

  • You keep asking questions,

  • we'll keep answering them.

  • I'm such a perv.

  • - The question was.

  • - I went to such a dark place.

  • Go ahead Case.

  • - If you have a bionic body part.

  • The truth is I do have a binoic body part.

  • (bouncy music)

- On this episode I have a guest!

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