Subtitles section Play video Print subtitles In this episode of MarieTV we do have some adult language. So if you have little ones around, grab your headphones now. Hey, it’s Marie Forleo and you are watching MarieTV, the place to be to create a business and life you love. If you have something inside of you that you want to bring to life, whether you want to write it, you want to bake it, you want to draw it, dance it, or paint it, you are in for a real treat. Today we’re talking about what it takes to live a truly creative life and my guest is really the person to show us how. Elizabeth Gilbert is the number one New York Times bestselling author of Eat, Pray, Love and several other internationally bestselling books of fiction and nonfiction. Gilbert began her career writing for Harper’s Bazaar, Spin, The New York Times Magazine, and GQ, and was a 3 time finalist for the National Magazine Award. The follow up memoir, Committed, became an instant number one New York Times bestseller. Her latest novel, The Signature of All Things, was named a best book of 2013 by The New York Times, O Magazine, The Washington Post, The Chicago Tribune, and The New Yorker. Elizabeth’s latest book, Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear, which tackles the elusive mystery of creativity, is now available wherever books are sold. Liz, thank you so much for taking the time to be here. My pleasure, I love being here. So Big Magic is your new book and, I have to tell you, it’s so genius. When I got this… this little copy below here that I actually have all flagged up and it’s kind of ratty… Oh, I love seeing flags coming out of books. Flags. So, I have to tell you that I didn't want this book to be over so I slowed myself down and I would savor it just like you would savor a good meal and I was so excited to have you on today because it’s brilliant and I feel like it’s one of these books that I will keep going back to again and again and again. So I wanna start by asking you what was the big magic that inspired Big Magic? What inspired you to write this? Wow. You know what it is? It’s a response to years of being out in public talking to people who tell me about the projects they want to be making and are not making, the things they want to be doing and are not doing. You know what I mean? And often times when I’m in public I meet people who are making and doing really cool things and they wanna tell me about it, but mostly it’s people who aren’t. And when they come to me with their problems about creativity or their struggles with creativity because they know I love to talk about creativity, I find that they always have some sort of very rational, reasonable kind of material real… real world reason why they’re not doing it that they can lay out as an explanation. But when you start to scratch away at that, what’s underneath it is always and only fear. Yes. Always and only fear. I don't care what the excuses or the rationalization or the justification for why they’re not doing the thing that’s calling to them, at the bottom of it they’re afraid. They’re afraid they don't have the talent, they’re afraid they don't have the right, they’re afraid it’s already been done better, they’re afraid they’ll be rejected or insulted or criticized or, worse, ignored. They’re afraid there’s no point, they’re afraid… you know, they just have these, like, tumbling piles of fear. And I see it so much and I hear the same questions again and again that I finally just thought, “Well, let’s officially talk about this.” Yes. You know? Like, let’s actually really break this down and try to figure out how people can live more creative lives without being so scared. One of the things you say about fear in the book is that fear is like a necessary companion. Yeah. And I loved that because I feel like in the world of personal development and sometimes in spirituality in certain circles, you know, you wanna push through your fear, get over your fear. Punch it in the face! Punch it in the face, dude! Yeah. Or kick it or whatever. Yeah. Or we, you know, just demonize it… Right. ...in this way and I was wondering if you could speak to this idea of fear as a companion. Yeah, I mean, the thing is, I have no desire to become a fearless person because the only genuinely fearless human beings I’ve ever met were psychopaths or toddlers. You know? Like… and neither one of those things is interesting for me to model my life after because there’s something missing from that person… Yes. ...that’s very essential and you see it in the kind of, like, weird eyes. You’re like, “Wow, you are a dangerous human being to yourself and others and I don't wanna be anywhere near you.” And so I’m not interested in fearlessness. Somebody said to me the other day, “Tell us how you conquered fear,” and I was like, “I… it’s adorable that you think I conquered…” Did you read the book? Yeah, that’s also… I’m afraid right this minute. I’m afraid, like, almost every minute of my life. So I haven’t conquered it and I’m not interested in conquering it. Actually, what my relationship with fear begins with is a tremendous amount of respect and appreciation because fear is the reason I am still alive today. It’s the reason you’re still alive today. Every single one of us can point to a moment in our lives that we survived because we were afraid. Because they said... the thing, the voices said, “Get out of that ocean, the waves are too big.” You know, “This car is going too fast.” “Don't get into the apartment with that guy.” “This street is not safe to walk down.” All of us are here because our fear is constantly protecting us, that’s its job and it does its job beautifully. It’s just that it’s all jacked up on Red Bull and it’s really trigger happy and it doesn't know the difference between a genuinely dangerous situation and just a little bit of a nervy situation. You know? So whenever I feel fear arise, which is constantly because I’m always trying to do creative things and creativity will always provoke your fear because it asks you to enter into a realm with an uncertain outcome, and fear hates that. It thinks you’re gonna die. So any time I start a new creative project the fear rises and the first thing I do is say to it, “Thank you so much for how much you care about me and how much you don't want anything bad to happen to me, and I really appreciate that. Your services are probably not needed here because I’m just writing a poem. Like, no one’s gonna die. No one’s gonna die, it’s ok.” You know, and I just talk to it but in this really friendly way and I don't go to war against it, I acknowledge its importance, and then I invite it along. I’m like, “You can come with me, but I’m doing this thing.” Yeah. You know? I loved the metaphor that you shared. Yeah. It’s like fear is gonna be in the car… Yeah. ...but it’s gonna be in the backseat… Yeah. ...and it’s not gonna drive. Or choose the snacks or hold the map or touch the radio. Like, fear doesn't get to make any decisions in creative ventures because frankly, with all due respect to Grandfather Fear, it simply doesn't understand what creativity even is because that’s a newer part of our brain, so it doesn't even know what’s going on. So you can’t let it have any control over your creative choices or else it will shut them down one idea after another. It’ll just be like, “Nope, don't do that. Nope, too risky. Nope.” And it’ll just be one no after another and your life will be so much smaller than you want your life to be. One of the things I love that you shared, which I feel is a big subset of fear, is this idea it’s all been done before. I think it’s the thing that I hear the most both in my own brain… Right. ...and when I talk to everyone out in the world… Yeah. ...about their ideas or their businesses or their projects, there’s this recurring narrative everything’s been done before. And I was wondering if you can speak to originality vs. authenticity. Ok, cool. I’m glad you brought this up. So whenever I talk to somebody who has an idea that they’re tremulously excited about, generally speaking within the next 2 minutes they will say, “But, you know, it’s not very original. It’s already been done.” And I always say, “But it has not yet been done by you.” It has not yet been done by you. And the answer is, yeah, guaranteed it’s already been done because humans are really inventive and inquisitive and creative and we’ve had 40 thousand years of the arts and pretty much everything has been done. You know? And that’s fine. Like, even Shakespeare, half of his stories he totally stole from older stories because there aren’t that many new stories to tell. But he told them in a way that had never been told before and then 500 years later we’re still borrowing them from him. We’re all just borrowing from each other. And even the most original piece of creativity that you ever saw in your life where you were like, “That’s groundbreaking, I’ve never seen anything like that before,” guaranteed