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  • Ok, wait.

  • I'm about to laugh so I gotta hang on for a second.

  • Ok.

  • Hey, it's Marie Forleo and you are watching MarieTV, the place to be to create a business and life you love.

  • Now, if you can't seem to get motivated because your hard work never pays off, this episode is for you.

  • Today's question comes from Chris and he writes:

  • Hey Marie, I'm 19 years old and here's my dilemma.

  • I have a massive lack of motivation to do anything or really live my life.

  • I look deep within myself for answers and see that I've always felt no matter what

  • I attempt to do, my hard work NEVER (in all caps) pays off.

  • School, volleyball, work, even friendships.

  • It never seems to be enough.

  • I now realize hard work isn't enough, so I want to know, what is?

  • What can I do to re-motivate myself and make my hard work smart work?

  • How can I make my efforts count so I can live a meaningful, fulfilling life?

  • Thank you for everything that you do.

  • The beauty in your soul transcends my small computer screen and no amount of words will

  • ever be enough for me to express my appreciation to you.

  • With love, Chris.”

  • Aww!

  • Chris, I adore you and not just for that really sweet and poetic thing you just shared with me.

  • I've gotta tell you, it is beyond awesome that you are so self aware.

  • Self aware enough to really ask these important questions at this point in your life.

  • While there's so much we could talk about today, I want to focus on one important shift

  • that you can make that if you really do it, Chris, and you make it a habit, it can change everything.

  • First you will instantly start to experience more of that meaning and fulfillment that

  • you've been craving.

  • Second, that motivation and excitement for life, that's going to come flooding back to you.

  • And third, this approach will give you the best possible chance of ensuring that your

  • hard work will actually pay off.

  • Now, while it can't guarantee results, because honestly nothing can, it does give you the

  • best possible chance of creating them.

  • Here's the habit.

  • If you want lasting motivation, you've got to focus on the action itself, not the outcome.

  • Now, it doesn't matter whether this is about school or work or sports or relationships.

  • Moving forward, Chris, here's what you've got to do.

  • You have to consciously shift your attention to the action you're taking instead of the

  • outcome or the result that you're trying to achieve.

  • In other words, start giving your full attention to the present moment, to the actual process

  • itself, not the end goal.

  • It's a practice that I call "making isness your business," which we talk about in more

  • detail in this video over here.

  • This is both a spiritually satisfying way to approach your life and it will give you

  • the best chance to get that payoff that you're looking for.

  • In fact, there is some research to back this up.

  • It shows that this one habit can help you stay genuinely motivated and experience that

  • meaning and fulfillment that you're lacking right now.

  • Here's a quick summary of the science.

  • Two researchers, Fishbach and Choi, from the University of Chicago and Korea Business School

  • conducted a study with over 100 students working out at the gym.

  • They divided the students up and one group was told to describe and focus on their end

  • goal, like losing weight.

  • The other group was told to describe and focus on the process itself: warming up, stretching,

  • running on the treadmill.

  • Both groups were told to keep that same focus throughout their entire workout.

  • Now, check out the result.

  • The end goal focus group actually ran for less time than the process focus group, 34

  • minutes versus 43 minutes.

  • And, this is what's relevant to you, Chris, the goal group reported that the workout felt

  • like more of an effort compared to the process group, who found the experience itself more enjoyable.

  • Then they repeated this process with things like doing origami and flossing your teeth

  • and the results were consistent.

  • Must have perfect mouth health!

  • I'm really enjoying the feeling of flossing my teeth!

  • Winner: Most likely to floss for life!

  • The bottom line, if what you're looking for is lasting motivation, meaning, and fulfillment,

  • you have got to focus your attention on the actions you're taking, not the end goal.

  • You know, high performance athletes and sports psychologists, they have known about this

  • and they've practiced it for eons.

  • Right?

  • Once you're clear on your goal, they all talk about the fact that if you really want

  • to win you have to train yourself to engage fully in the present moment and really get

  • into that state of flow.

  • So this is your mission, Chris. If you choose to accept it,

  • it will make a tremendous difference in both how you feel and what you achieve for the rest of your life.

  • Now, two more quick notes before we wrap up.

  • Number one, you've gotta commit to being a lifelong learner and ask for feedback from

  • people that you trust and respect.

  • Because who knows, Chris?

  • I mean, maybe there is stuff that you're doing that you could actually improve.

  • For example, you might want to ask your soccer coach if he or she has any feedback for you

  • that can help your performance on the field.

  • There is always another level of mastery to reach in any area of life.

  • So be proactive and get the feedback that you need to keep on growing.

  • Number two, whenever you feel down and demotivated I want you to do this.

  • You've gotta help somebody else.

  • Just take a look around and ask yourself who might need a little encouragement or some

  • support or some appreciation?

  • I mean, is it a family member or a friend or someone in your community?

  • It doesn't have to be some huge, monumental act, just something simple from your heart,

  • and you've got a big one.

  • I mean, one of the best ways to stay rooted in your own happiness is to help someone else experience their own.

  • So let's wrap this one up with a reminder of this week's key habit and, yes, it's

  • also our tweetable.

  • The secret to staying motivated: focus on what you're doing, not what you're trying to achieve.

  • Now I would love to hear from you.

  • So can you relate to what Chris has been feeling lately?

  • Like you're working really hard and yet it never seems to pay off?

  • Do you have any personal habits that help you stay in that state of present moment flow in your own life?

  • I want to hear from you.

  • So the best conversations happen after the episode over at MarieForleo.com, so go on

  • over there and leave a comment now.

  • Once you're there, be sure to subscribe to our email list and become an MF insider.

  • You'll get instant access to a powerful training called How to Get Anything You Want

  • and you'll get exclusive content, special giveaways, and personal updates from me that

  • I just don't share anywhere else.

  • Stay on your game and keep going for your dreams because the world needs that special

  • gift that only you have.

  • Thank you so much for watching and I'll catch you next time on MarieTV.

  • Ready to find your voice and sell with heart?

  • We'll show you how.

  • Get started now with our free writing class at TheCopyCure.com.

  • Side effects include enlarged profits.

  • Oh, great.

  • We're rolling.

  • That just means I've got to make sure that I'm doing more things.

  • Do you think we can get Rihanna on just to go, “I really love my work, work, work,

  • work, work”?

  • Imma go for it.

  • Imma go for it.

  • We put that in your can?

  • No.

  • We put that in our can.

  • It went in the can.

Ok, wait.

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