What is it?

You know what that’s made out of?

No…

Boyfriend material.

How to Date Japanese Girls?

For 3 years now nearly every other question I’ve received seems to involve the keywords Japanese, girls and how.

Firstly, YouTube is already littered with a never-ending list of videos covering this topic

and I’ve chosen to ignore such questions out of principle; to me, it seems absurd to try to generalise the views of 65 million women in a 10 minute video.

But…

It is christmas, and in the spirit of christmas, what better time to dispose of my principles,

massively overgeneralise and give the people what they want.

So with that in mind I recently caught up my good friend Chiaki,

an actual real life Japanese girl, to interrogate her on the secrets of dating Japanese girls,

discuss our own dating experiences and review some groundbreaking chat up lines.

So thanks of meeting with me today Chiaki.

Thank you very much for having me here.

I’m hoping we can unravel the secret to dating Japanese girls.

We will, yeah.

You’ve got the nice, evil, scary chair.

It’s very comfy actually.

I’ve got the rocking chair. Brilliant.

It makes you look better.

Yeah definitely. I wish I had a rocking chair with me at all times.

Let’s dive straight in. The first question;

do you find Japanese girls like a certain nationality more than others?

Is there a certain nationality that comes out the most popular in your opinion?

Yeah I think so. Americans are quite popular, as we learn American-English at school.

It’s kind of rigged isn’t it - for American guys. After that though?

Yeah after that I think Australians are seen as quite fun and cool…and sporty.

Sporty, right. And after those guys, is there another one perhaps?

Irish guys - they’re quite funny and fun.

Right. Funny and fun…but above all that, is there like another nationality that comes up.

Yeah there is - French guys tend to be popular as well because…

Let’s just move on. Next question.

It’s funny, you’re supposed to be the expert here - but it feels like you’re getting some of the answers wrong.

But that’s fine…

But what characteristics do you think a Japanese girl would go for in a foreign guy?

What three personality traits would they look for.

Personality…definitely a gentleman.

A gentleman. What do you have to do to be a gentleman?

Well, always ladies first.

Always ladies first. After that?

Funny…humour.

Great. And the third one?

Kindness.

Kindness. Good. Well it’s looking good…for most guys.

And what about appearance? What three things would you look for there?

I think girls quite like if you have a big back.

A big back?

Yeah so when girls look at you from the back and we want to hug you, you know.

Right…how the hell do you get a big back?

I don't know.

What does that entail? And the second?

Veins.

Vein…what?

Yeah.

You mean like veins…

Yeah, you got one! The more you have clearly, that’s better.

You’re not making this up are you?

No!

We haven’t got a script here, she’s actually said veins. Having a good vein.

If you ask girls, I think 70% of girls will say yes.

Out of 40 girls.

You heard it here first. Have a good vein…and the third one?

The third one…I think a sharp chin.

A sharp chin. How the hell do I do that?

Train your chin. Maybe, take something out.

Well let’s move on.

So they need to have a big back, a good vein and a sharp chin.

Yeah, that’s me out of the picture for that.

So when you were a student, how many girls in your class do you think would have wanted to date a foreigner?

Out of 40 girls.

Well, not many I think. May be five.

Maybe five.

I remember when I was a teacher, I asked some students, some girls what their views on foreigners were

and a lot of them would say foreigners are cool.

But not that many wanted to actually date a foreigner,

they say it would medoukusai, it was difficult, it was stressful, the language barriers and cultural barriers.

Yeah, that's true.

I think loads of girls want to date or want to chat with foreigners but…

it’s a bit difficult to explain how we feel sometimes.

Because of the cultural barrier and the language barrier…

Yeah...

and we are shy and we need the confidence to talk to foreigners.

I think the language barrier is a bigger issue for Japanese girls dating foreigners,

than foreigners realise perhaps.

Definitely.

And if you can speak some Japanese that makes us feel kind of comfortable

and make us want to speak more.

I think if you know just a little bit of Japanese it really gives you the edge.

Oh yeah definitely.

When I met a girl at a house party who later became my girlfriend,

I had to go to her and talk in bad Japanese

and that lulled her into a sense of security that I can use some Japanese and can talk.

That's lovely.

That makes a huge difference. Even if you know even rubbish Japanese it works.

So you don’t even need to be that good at Japanese?

Not at all - some phrases, some vocabulary is enough, so we can start the conversation.

from this.

I’ve got a friend in Tokyo and a friend in Sendai who use Tinder.

That Tinder app.

Yeah that’s that dating site isn’t it?

Yeah but they always talk about how brilliant it is and how well it works.

I had a friend in Tokyo who used it and he had a date everyday for two weeks through Tinder.

Oh really. So that means many Japanese girls do it.

Perhaps. I don’t actually like Tinder.

Though I’m making it sound really good - this isn’t a sponsorship video for Tinder, I don’t like it at all.

Do you have one though?

Maybe. But I swear I don’t use it, I hate Tinder so much.

Show me the picture later.

No…because you just judge someone by their appearance. It’s like there’s a good face, there’s a bad face.

Yeah, by one picture, isn't it?

Can you upload a couple of pictures?

Yeah you can upload four pictures.

Oh do you? Ok.

Show me later.

Ok. Maybe…

that’d be quite interesting. A video about trying Tinder in Tokyo.

Yeah right, you should actually try it.

Alright. I’ll give it a shot. That’ll be the next video; Tinder in Tokyo.

Let us know how it goes.

So I’ve collected a list of about 20 pick up lines or chat up lines.

Half of them are in English, half of them in Japanese.

I figured if you can rate them on a scale of 1 - 10,

Ok.

we can try and build a picture of what Japanese girls might like or what might work.

I’ll be pretty surprised if any of them are good to be honest.

Well that is to doubt the poetic beauty nature of a chat up line.

Yeah, I probably shouldn’t be too quick to judge.

No…are you a microwave, because you just melted my heart.

2

Wow! You look a lot like, my next girlfriend.

1

Is your name Google? Because you’ve got everything I’m searching for?

Wow, 7.

Kiss me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist right?

8.

Did it hurt?

Did what hurt?

When you, fell from heaven.

3.

Here, check out my shirt.

What is it?

You know what it’s made out of?

No.

Boyfriend material.

2.

Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got fine written all over you.

3.

Is it ok if I took your picture? I want to prove to my friends that, angels really do exist.

Alright. 5.

Ok, so you actually liked some of them. Which surprises me.

For the record, I haven’t used any of those.

Are you sure?

I might use the dinosaur one.

I like that one.

Kiss me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist right?

Alright, now let’s try some Japanese ones.

Yeah, let's do that.

Next year, we’ll be laughing together.

7.

Next year, we’ll be laughing together.

I like that, it’s quite nice.

I’ve got no-one to eat my ice cream with.

That’s so sad.

2

I’ve got to no-one to eat my ice cream with. Why ice cream specifically?

You relax me more effectively than a dolphin.

7.

You relax me more effectively than a dolphin.

That’s cute.