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  • Here we will explore true facts about the fruit bat.

  • There are many species of fruit bat. Most of these are megabats.

  • This means they're in the suborder of Megachiroptera

  • and the family Pteropodidae.

  • Yes, the Latins went a little apesh*t with the naming of things,

  • which is, however, lucky because if YouTube had done the naming

  • these would all be called "big-ass bat check out my tumblr you dick weed

  • .com"

  • The megabat fruit bats include the largest true flying mammals in the world:

  • the flying fox. Which is a bat.

  • The largest of these can have wing spans of over five feet.

  • Luckily, they eat fruit.

  • Unlike the bird, the bat wing is made of a thin membrane of skin

  • stretching between its body, arm, hand, and very long creepy fingers.

  • When resting, the megabat uses its wing to surround itself like a blanket.

  • It hangs upside down with the help of its cool little feet

  • in order to create a chimney in the event of a dutch oven.

  • Thank you, Urban Dictionary.

  • This is important because the megabat possesses an amazing sense of smell.

  • Unlike the microbat, the megabat does not possess echolocation.

  • This is because with the exception of the guava, fruit does not give up much chase.

  • Here you can see different parts of the megabat's anatomy.

  • Its wings, its tiny round kneecaps...

  • Wait, those aren't kneecaps.

  • What are you doing, you're licking-? Oh my.

  • Let's just pretend they're kneecaps.

  • For amusement, groups of megabats hang on trees and

  • using the raincoat that evolution has given them,

  • they flash one another.

  • Mega-dirty. Megabat.

  • Partially due to the fact that these animals are eaten as a delicacy,

  • they are endangered and sometimes their babies must be raised in

  • the cutest damn sanctuaries in the world.

  • Meet Eric. Eric is not a megabat.

  • Eric is one of the few microbat fruit bats. When he was young,

  • some of the other microbats called him Vagina-Face.

  • No one ever referred to him as a flying fox.

  • In fact, he was given the nickname Flying-F*ck,

  • but those bats were idiots because Eric is a sensitive and wonderful fruit bat.

  • He even writes poetry

  • about grapes.

  • And while those other bats live empty lives judging the world by how it looks,

  • Eric focused on what was inside

  • and he found Lily.

  • and the two of them have better sex than all the rest of them.

Here we will explore true facts about the fruit bat.

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