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  • [Cheerful orchestra music]

  • ♪ ♪

  • [Engine turning over]

  • [Rock music]

  • Don't wanna hear

  • about how the real world's ♪

  • the place for me

  • There's nothing out there

  • won't look better

  • on a TV screen

  • There a better way

  • ♪ I don't care what you say

  • ♪ I just want to play

  • We all just want to play

  • Things will be all right

  • soon as I get back to school

  • ♪ ♪

  • Okay, Swanlings, these birds

  • are ready to fly.

  • [Laughter]

  • Hands in, everyone.

  • I move to declare this Swan

  • family dinner in session.

  • All: seconded.

  • [Laughter]

  • So any new business?

  • Oh, yes.

  • Why did you leave vghs?

  • Did you have a fight with

  • your friends?

  • I move we move on from this

  • line of inquiry.

  • All in favor, say, "aye."

  • Both: nay.

  • Call for a revote?

  • Both: nay.

  • [Laughter]

  • Well, if you must know,

  • you were right all along.

  • VGHS is dumb.

  • I would much rather go to vghs--

  • Video Game Home School.

  • [Laughter]

  • Honey, could we please turn

  • off your laughing robot?

  • Were having a serious

  • conversation.

  • [Laughter]

  • No.

  • This is why I built Audie in the

  • first place, to lubricate

  • awkward social situations.

  • I could use some more social

  • lubricant myself.

  • [Laughter]

  • See?

  • Honey, we're really worried

  • about you.

  • Clearly you're running away

  • from something.

  • There’s nothing to worry

  • about.

  • I’ve just dropped out of school

  • to live with my parents

  • for the rest of my life.

  • [Laughter]

  • [Doorbell rings]

  • Oh, that must be Jenny with the

  • rest of my things.

  • Uh...

  • [Pounds table]

  • Meeting adjourned.

  • [Laughter]

  • One second.

  • Hi, Kiwi!

  • [Studio audience whoops]

  • Ted, Brian...

  • Welcome to my home.

  • [Laughter]

  • Um, Ki, can you open up?

  • I brought you flowers.

  • and I know you're really mad

  • at me right now.

  • I’m sorry.

  • Also, also, it was a

  • nine-hour cab ride, and I really

  • have to pee.

  • [Laughter]

  • [Sighs]

  • Wow.

  • Nice place.

  • Firstly, thank you

  • for the flowers.

  • Secondly...

  • I am very mad at you.

  • Oh, crap.

  • Brian, run!

  • You lied to me.

  • You stood me up for prom to go

  • to an erotic arcade.

  • and you killed Josh's virtual

  • pet.

  • Well, technically,

  • I let it starve.

  • [Scoffs loudly]

  • Good save, man.

  • and you, Brian...

  • for shame.

  • For what?

  • For--

  • I don't know.

  • I’m just really thrown by you

  • being here with Ted.

  • I thought you two were fighting.

  • well, we are.

  • But I called a truce because we

  • wanted to make sure that you're

  • okay.

  • Aw, thanks.

  • Yeah, turns out, with the

  • Whole Jenny thing and the whole

  • Ted thing, you're kind of the

  • only friend that I don't have

  • a thing with right now.

  • I miss you too.

  • What?

  • I miss you way more than he

  • does.

  • Oh, grow up, Ted.

  • grow a bigger butt, Brian.

  • Wow! God, why don't you two just

  • go and make out already?

  • Maybe we will.

  • Yeah, maybe we will.

  • Wait. We will?

  • Oh, no.

  • I mean, no, I never really--

  • Yeah, I never--

  • Me neither.

  • I just--I mean, you are...

  • you too.

  • What is happening?

  • [Laughter]

  • Okay, Ki, where do you want

  • this?

  • [Studio audience cheers]

  • Hi, Jenny.

  • Thanks for bringing my stuff.

  • You can just put that...

  • Anywhere.

  • Hi, Brian.

  • Jenny.

  • How’s it going?

  • Great. How are you?

  • Also great.

  • "Also great"?

  • What a coincidence.

  • I know--small world.

  • Yeesh, these two...

  • Frosty.

  • [Laughter]

  • Okay, what's with the

  • Laughing robot?

  • [Laughter]

  • Oh, you guys hear that too?

  • Of course we hear it.

  • It’s really distracting.

  • Her name is Audie, and she's

  • not distracting.

  • She’s charming.

  • [Audience aws]

  • Okay, that is weird, Ki.

  • Actually, yeah, are you okay?

  • Is this, like, a cry for help?

  • Youre a cry for help!

  • Oh.

  • [Chuckles nervously]

  • Mm.

  • Yeah, so, uh, I was fine before

  • you all showed up.

  • And thank you for coming,

  • everybody.

  • And if you could all please

  • leave, that would be excellent.

  • Nobody’s going anywhere.

  • No, if you kids are having

  • problems, you should face them

  • head-on.

  • Ooh, Karen, are you thinking

  • what I’m thinking?

  • Both: Couples Council.

  • No, not Couples Council.

  • I hate that game.

  • All in favor, say, "Aye."

  • Both: aye.

  • Aye.

  • ow.

  • [Laughter]

  • Couples Council is a little

  • game Karen and I whipped up

  • back when we first moved in

  • together.

  • Yes, and if it can get us

  • through the great dishwashing

  • argument, it can help you

  • kids too.

  • Ki, why don't you tell your

  • Friends the rules?

  • First, you pick a partner.

  • I call Ted.

  • Oh, fine.

  • I call Ki.

  • I want to be with Ki.

  • Well, I don't want to be

  • with you.

  • Don’t worry, Ted.

  • We are gonna crush these chumps.

  • Yeah, then Ki will have

  • to forgive me.

  • Hey, Ki, who's dumber--

  • Ted or Jenny for picking Ted?

  • Easy answer--Jenny.

  • [Gasps]

  • Yeah.

  • Better go put some

  • Ebelskivers on, honey.

  • It’s gonna be a long game.

  • [Laughter]

  • Ted, sit over there.

  • Jenny, can you recall for the

  • court the events of April 23rd?

  • Uh...

  • The day you broke up with me.

  • You broke up with me.

  • Yeah, 'cause you were gonna

  • break up with me.

  • Objection!

  • Your honor, counsel is

  • testifying.

  • Were on the same team.

  • Yes, and you are blowing

  • our case.

  • [Gavel bangs]

  • Order in the court.

  • Unless you all want contempt

  • tokens, I suggest you move on.

  • We call to the stand

  • Theodore Wong.

  • I’m supposed to stand?

  • Just sit in the chair, Ted.

  • I’m supposed to sit.

  • [Sighs]

  • Ted...

  • Take responsibility for what

  • you've done, or we're never

  • getting back together.

  • Argumentative.

  • Sustained.

  • Come on, Ki, just take me

  • back already.

  • Why?

  • Because...

  • We are...

  • You know...

  • Soul mates!

  • How can we know that, though?

  • I mean, really, you're the first

  • boy I’ve ever dated Ted, and I’m the

  • first girl you've ever dated.

  • Ah, that's not true, though.

  • I went out with Jenny

  • freshman year.

  • What?

  • You went out with Jenny?

  • Oh, crap.

  • She meant nothing to me.

  • It was the first week

  • of school.

  • I literally forgot about it.

  • Yeah, me too.

  • We only kissed three times.

  • You guys kissed?

  • What?

  • Your honor, I would like to

  • call a recess so we can discuss

  • this new evidence.

  • Yes, I think a recess

  • is in order.

  • [Cell phone ringing]

  • That is my mom.

  • Thank god.

  • Ted, you're on your own.

  • [Laughter]

  • Uh...

  • [Laughter]

  • So, uh...

  • Who wants ice cream?

  • I do!

  • [Laughs]

  • Hey, mom, what's up?

  • Brian, this may sound gross,

  • but I think we should kiss three

  • times to make it even.

  • [Laughter]

  • I don't think that's gonna

  • win us any points with the jury,

  • Ki.

  • I think you should listen to

  • your co-counsel, honey.

  • [Laughter]

  • [Door opens]

  • Where’s Ted?

  • Why, so you can kiss him

  • a fourth time, you hussy?

  • No, no, where's Ted?

  • Jenny, what's up?

  • Freddie died.

  • How?

  • My god, what happened?

  • I don't know.

  • There was an accident.

  • He was on a motorcycle.

  • My mom just told me.

  • Somebody has to tell Ted.

  • Hey, guys, where's the

  • bathroom?

  • 'cause I got to poop.

  • Ted, you should probably--

  • It’s right through there,

  • son.

  • [Mouth full] okay, great.

  • I’m bringing this bad boy

  • with me.

  • So good.

  • What should we do?

  • I’ll tell him.

  • How?

  • How do you tell him something

  • like that?

  • y-you kids sit down.

  • I will tell Ted.

  • Everything is gonna be okay.

  • Well figure--

  • Mm, false alarm--no poop.

  • Mrs. Swan, is it okay if I get

  • an extra scoop of ice cream?

  • Of course, Ted.

  • Have as much as you want.

  • Sweet.

  • [Laughter]

  • [Robot powers down]

  • Well, folks, say bye-scream

  • to the ice cream, 'cause I just

  • spilled it all over the ground.

  • Do you have any paper towels?

  • Its okay, Ted.

  • Sit down.

  • Oh, okay.

  • Oh, right.

  • Um, where were we?

  • Ted...

  • I need you to listen.

  • There’s been an accident.

  • Oh, I know--I just told you.

  • It just slipped out of my hands.

  • I’m really sorry, again.

  • Uh...

  • What’s going on?

  • Your father was in an

  • accident.

  • And I’m sorry, but he died.

  • What?

  • Um...

  • Uh, no, let's play.

  • Of course, you can stay here,

  • But we should call your mother.

  • Shut up.

  • Just let me--

  • No one expects you to

  • understand how to feel right

  • now.

  • Um, uh, okay.

  • Um...

  • Whose turn is it?

  • Oh, honey, I know this is

  • hard, but we should probably

  • call your mom.

  • Whatever.

  • It’s--it's okay.

  • Okay, so it'll be my turn.

  • I-I’m approaching the bench.

  • Somebody call a witness.

  • It’s gonna be okay, man.

  • [breathing shakily]

  • [breathing heavily]

  • I got to go.

  • [retching]

  • [sobbing]

  • [retching]

  • [atmospheric music]

  • ♪ ♪

  • Oh, sorry.

  • Um, hey, I got to go, dad.

  • Yeah, love you too.

  • All right, bye.

  • Sorry, it's just--

  • it's kind of hard to get

  • a little privacy around here.

  • Yeah.

  • Uh, how's your dad?

  • Uh, you know, alive.

  • Sorry. That was...

  • It’s all yours.

  • You guys aren't ready yet?

  • Ted will be back from the

  • coroner's any moment.

  • Sorry. I’ll hurry.

  • It’s fine.

  • Uh, here, I made pamphlets.

  • "Helping Ted Grieve"?

  • It’s our complete guide to

  • helping Ted through this

  • difficult time.

  • Now, I only have a few minutes,

  • so I’ll talk you through the

  • highlights.

  • Depending on who you ask, there

  • are 5 to 12 stages of grief.

  • [Vehicle approaching]

  • He’s here.

  • [Sighs]

  • Hey, guys, we're back.

  • Ted...

  • Hello.

  • How are you feeling?

  • Do you need anything?

  • How’d it go?

  • Pretty good.

  • Morgues are weird.

  • Yeah.

  • It’s been a long night, gang.

  • Why don't we let Ted get

  • some sleep?

  • Actually, no, I’m okay.

  • Mrs. Swan, what's for breakfast?

  • Honey, you can have whatever

  • you want.

  • Score.

  • Uh, chocolate pancakes, please.

  • Of course.

  • Ted, we want you to know--

  • sorry, it's important that we

  • let you know it's okay for you

  • to cry in front of us.

  • [Scoffs]

  • Why would I do that?

  • That’s lame.

  • Because, Ted...

  • Your dad just died.

  • Yeah, doing what he loved--

  • Riding a motorcycle without

  • a helmet.

  • That’s good, Ted.

  • Often an important part of the

  • process is describing the death,

  • even in detail.

  • You know what?

  • I think I’m gonna go to bed.

  • Okay.

  • Well, my bedroom's just down

  • the hall, so...

  • Cool. Thanks.

  • Leave me alone.

  • Oh.

  • That was weird.

  • Youre here for

  • Frederick Wong?

  • Right this way.

  • [Gurney sliding]

  • Is this him?

  • Yeah.

  • Brian, do you know how we can

  • get in touch with Ted's mother?

  • I think she's on tour

  • right now.

  • Sweetie, why don't we worry

  • about that when Ted wakes up?

  • Ki’s making all the

  • arrangements right now.

  • I’ll keep you updated.

  • Thanks, Calhoun.

  • Yeah, yeah, I’m okay.

  • Oh.

  • A refrigeration fee.

  • Oh, I see.

  • No, yes, I’m not really sure.

  • I’ll have to get back to you

  • on that.

  • But after the decline of

  • rhythm gaming and his bitter

  • divorce from Hong Kong pop

  • sensation li Hong Chen,

  • Wong stepped away from the

  • spotlight and into the

  • classroom.

  • As Professor Wong at

  • Video Game High School, he spent

  • his remaining days inspiring the

  • gamers of the future.

  • Yeah, uh, Mr. Wong was

  • always cool about letting us

  • skip class, so, uh...

  • yeah.

  • Thank you, Sebastian.

  • Ted.

  • Oh, hey, everybody.

  • Uh, good morning.

  • Or should I say good "mourning"?

  • "Mourning," you know, with a

  • "u," like a dead guy.

  • Yeesh.

  • Where’s Audie when you need her?

  • [Laughs]

  • That’s very healthy and amusing,

  • Ted.

  • Cool.

  • Um, about this funeral, my mom

  • probably can't make it,

  • but I got her credit card,

  • so let's send my old man off

  • in style.

  • Yeah, sure.

  • Whatever you want.

  • That’s nice.

  • Cool.

  • Okay, so I’m thinking

  • fireworks, jugglers, and,

  • you know...

  • What else do they have at

  • cool funerals?

  • Let’s start by picking

  • a casket.

  • A casket--duh.

  • What would I do without you, Ki?

  • All right, let's do this thing.

  • How does 11:00 sound for the

  • burial?

  • Yeah, cool.

  • Okay.

  • Did you find a flower

  • arrangement you like?

  • Um, no, not yet.

  • Oh, yeah, here, check out this

  • awesome video, Ki.

  • This is one of Freddie’s

  • first videos.

  • That’s his dirt bike.

  • Those are his chains.

  • Oh, man.

  • Isn’t my dad awesome, Ki?

  • Yes.

  • Yes, he was.

  • Yeah.

  • Can I get some more cheese?

  • Sure.

  • This is going very well.

  • I didn't think he'd be at

  • acceptance so soon.

  • Well, I’m not sure that

  • that's what this is, honey.

  • What do you mean?

  • [Doorbell rings]

  • I got it.

  • Supersonic!

  • [Imitates whooshing]

  • [Laughs]

  • Cut savies.

  • Wow!

  • Ted Wong?

  • You got him.

  • Ooh.

  • Here you go.

  • Ah, thank you.

  • Cool.

  • What is it, man?

  • [Gasps]

  • Cool.

  • Hey, you kids watching

  • a movie?

  • Yeah, it's got my dad in it.

  • Check it out.

  • Is it going yet?

  • [Electric guitar playing]

  • Are you rolling yet?

  • All right, okay.

  • What’s up, jerks?

  • This is Freddie Wong, and if

  • Youre watching this, it means

  • I got got, yo.

  • [Heavy rock guitar music]

  • ♪ ♪

  • All right, let's get down to

  • business and see what sweet

  • loot I’m dropping in this...

  • [echoing] ♪ video will! ♪

  • [exhales deeply]

  • First up, I bequeath my raddest

  • guitars and all of my money...

  • To Nikki Sixx of Motley Crue.

  • Here, zoom in on this.

  • Zoom in on this.

  • Nikki, you and I never met,

  • but if we did, I think we would

  • have been bros, man.

  • [Heavy rock guitar music]

  • ♪ ♪

  • As for my ex-wife, li, I would

  • leave you my dirt bike, but you

  • already took that and everything

  • else I own, so up yours!

  • [heavy rock guitar music]

  • Jeez.

  • As for my stupid son, Ted,

  • He gets this crappy lav mic

  • that he couldn't set up right.

  • Are you gonna fix this or what?

  • God, you are such your mother's

  • son.

  • Of course she would leave

  • me with you.

  • How hard is this to set up?

  • Just clip it on and don't have

  • it fall off.

  • Just keep it out of my--

  • Just go to the--

  • Don’t go to the chains.

  • Just clear the chains.

  • Get it onto the--yes.

  • Go, clip it on, jeez.

  • [Coughs]

  • How much longer is this

  • gonna take?

  • Do you think you deserve any

  • of this?

  • Do you think you deserve any

  • of my stuff?

  • No, not at all.

  • No, because you can't even

  • get a lav mic.

  • Get out of here.

  • God, I hate you.

  • Go, get out of the way.

  • Get out of the shot.

  • All right.

  • All right, where were we?

  • I have no idea where we are now.

  • Ted, are you all right?

  • You can train a monkey

  • to do this, you moron.

  • Uh, I got to go pee.

  • What are you wearing?

  • Jeez, get this bow tie off.

  • Get it--just--

  • I need a second.

  • Give me a second.

  • What were we doing?

  • [Dish shatters]

  • It’s good that he died.

  • Both: Kimberly.

  • I’m sorry.

  • That was rude.

  • Sweetie.

  • I’ll get the broom.

  • It’s okay, honey.

  • She’s just processing it.

  • [Gunfire on TV]

  • Thanks.

  • Ashley Barnstormer has done

  • It.

  • Napalm has won the high school

  • FPS championship

  • Well, that sucks.

  • Ted's gonna be all right.

  • Nothing is all right.

  • Dinner’s almost ready, so--

  • Oh, you're kissing.

  • Sorry.

  • Youre kissing.

  • Um...

  • [Beeping, light music]

  • I need you in the closet.

  • So, uh, what's up?

  • Whoa, whoa, slow down.

  • What’s going on?

  • I’m coming back to VGHS,

  • and I’ve decided I’m still

  • your girlfriend.

  • Stop.

  • What are you doing?

  • I thought you were mad at me.

  • I was, but that was before.

  • Before what?

  • I’m sorry.

  • So what's everyone doing

  • this summer?

  • Got any big plans?

  • Uh...

  • 'cause I was thinking we

  • could all go hang out at my

  • place.

  • Yeah, sounds cool, dude.

  • Yeah, we got a pool and

  • a b-ball court and--

  • oh, Freddie borrowed the

  • wide-screen, so we just have to

  • go over to his place to pick

  • it up.

  • His place?

  • Like, his room?

  • No, no, like, his place.

  • It’s only 20 minutes away

  • By bus, though.

  • You live by yourself?

  • Yeah, since my 10th birthday.

  • It was the best birthday present

  • ever.

  • Oh, honey, who takes care

  • of you?

  • Oh, um, there's a maid that

  • comes by once a month

  • and jerry the doorman.

  • He’s really wise.

  • Ted, that's horrible.

  • What?

  • No way, that's awesome.

  • Okay?

  • It’s gonna be great, guys.

  • Come on.

  • Yeah, you're right.

  • Yeah. No, that sounds cool.

  • No, it doesn't.

  • Why are we humoring him?

  • Honey.

  • Freddie was a terrible

  • father, Ted.

  • No, he wasn't.

  • Yes, he was.

  • You didn't even know him, Ki!

  • He was rad.

  • He bought me a loft.

  • He gave me his old phone every

  • time he wanted a new one.

  • and now he's--

  • and now you'll never get to

  • hang out with him, so I feel bad

  • for you!

  • Ted, one second.

  • There’s gonna be a lot of things

  • to figure out in the next few

  • months, but I want to let you

  • know, you can live with us as

  • long as you need to, okay?

  • Might have to help out with

  • chores a bit.

  • Mrs. Swan keeps a clean house.

  • But we'd love to have you.

  • I’m sorry I ruined dinner.

  • You didn't ruin anything.

  • Go get some rest, and we'll see

  • you in the morning.

  • Honey, are you okay?

  • [Sobs]

  • Sweetie, come over here.

  • Aw, sweetie.

  • What’s wrong?

  • Hmm?

  • I cheated.

  • What?

  • I cheated to win the

  • election.

  • That’s--that's why I left.

  • I tried really hard to do

  • everything right, but it just

  • made everything worse, so that's

  • Why I’m home.

  • Why didn't you tell us?

  • Because I thought maybe

  • you would hate me.

  • and the thought of that...

  • [Sniffles]

  • I love you both so much.

  • I don't want you to hate me.

  • Hey, you listen to me.

  • We are so proud of you.

  • There is nothing in this world

  • that can make us stop loving

  • you...

  • ever.

  • Okay?

  • [Sobbing]

  • Brain, wake up.

  • What?

  • What is it?

  • What’s going on?

  • Ted is gone.

  • Were never gonna find him.

  • We should wake up my parents.

  • We should call the police.

  • Ki, he's fine, okay?

  • He’s probably just wandering

  • around.

  • Where would he go?

  • is anything even open right now?

  • Stop the car!

  • [Rock music]

  • ♪ ♪

  • Hey, Ted.

  • Hey.

  • Almost done.

  • [Explosion]

  • Whoo!

  • Looks like you are an axe

  • legend.

  • You know what?

  • You and I make quite the team.

  • Catch you later, newbie.

  • [Heavy rock guitar music]

  • ♪ ♪

  • I’ve beaten this game

  • I don't know how many times

  • just to hear him say that.

  • I’m not okay, Brian.

  • I know, man.

  • Did you know he didn't even

  • know how to ride a bike?

  • He went out without a helmet.

  • How stupid can you be?

  • Now he's dead, and...

  • [Scoffs]

  • Did he even care?

  • God...

  • He was such an asshole.

  • I’ve been terrible to you guys.

  • I’m so sorry...

  • 'cause...

  • Youre the only ones that even--

  • [Sniffles, laughs]

  • He probably even wouldn't care

  • that I’m sad right now,

  • but I’m sad anyway.

  • I can't breathe.

  • I can't think.

  • It hurts so much.

  • [Crying] why is that, huh?

  • Why does it hurt so much?

  • 'cause he was your dad, man,

  • and you loved him.

  • That’s stupid.

  • No.

  • Dude, it was stupid

  • that he didn't love you.

  • It’s okay to cry.

  • [Sobbing]

[Cheerful orchestra music]

Subtitles and vocabulary

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