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[music playing]
[growling]
-I'll show you to your coffin room.
-What's she doing here?
-I've asked Erin to stay with us.
-This half-fang?
Why?
-She saved Ingrid's life.
-You're really not selling her.
-She's staying whether you like it or not.
-My castle, my rules.
[growling]
Renfield!
Chuck her bag out.
-Yes, sir.
-Times have changed, and I say Erin stays.
-And I say she goes.
-Don't I get a vote?
-No.
-Yes.
Listen to Ingrid.
-I don't want her.
-You don't get a vote.
-You can't have two queen bees in a hive.
It would be a fight to the death.
[coughing]
-My money's on the half-fang.
-I will not have fighting in this house.
Erin is staying, and you two will leave her alone.
-Look, I don't want to cause a rift
between you and your family.
I can look after myself.
-Not if the Slayers Guild catch you.
Ever since Ingrid's attack on Stokely,
they've been staking first and asking questions later.
Dad will be fine.
At least stay until you get your full powers.
There's so much you need to learn.
-All right, I'll stay.
'Til I'm ready.
Thanks, Vlad.
I'll just get the rest of my stuff.
-Quickly.
That was the last of the serum.
-So what now?
Can't exactly ask the Slayers Guild for more.
We're on our own, Sis.
You know what they'd do to me if they knew.
-It's OK.
I've got a plan.
-Does it involve a large wooden pointy thing?
We have to talk about this.
I was bitten.
We both know what that means.
And when the time comes, you know what has to be done.
-(TEARFULLY) I told you I'm going to cure you.
If I can wipe out the bloodline that infected you,
the curse will be lifted.
-You can't wipe out the Draculas.
-Ever since Ingrid bit you, she's
been getting weaker and weaker.
All I need is one chance to get close to her.
-And how do you plan to do that?
-They've just invited me to live with them.
-You can't live with vampires.
You're a vegetarian.
-And a trained slayer.
-With a pulse.
-I've been using stasis spray, remember?
It blocks out my heartbeat and my breathing and my scent.
They'll think I'm a newly-bitten half-fang.
-You can't.
-The serum's working.
You rest.
I'll be OK.
I'll let them get used to me.
And just when they think they're safe, I'll strike.
[choking]
VLAD: Ingrid?
[vacuum cleaner roaring]
-I-- I've never seen anything like this before.
I just-- I don't know what to do.
-Maybe I can help.
I could take care of Ingrid if you'd like me to.
-Really?
-We need to make her more comfortable.
See if you can find whatever us vampires like.
-I know this vampire stuff seems strange at first,
but you'll get used to it.
OK, I'm on it.
Thanks, Erin.
-She's a vampire.
It's not like killing a human.
[gasping]
-Vlad!
-What's wrong?
-She's breathing.
-Breathing?
Ingrid.
Ingrid!
[choking]
[vacuum cleaner roaring]
-Her pulse.
Dad?
Dad!
-What now?
-Ingrid's getting worse.
-Do let me know when she crumbles to dust.
-Seriously.
She's breathing and she's got a pulse.
We need to do something to cool her down.
-Looks like an advanced blood infection.
It's a temporary thing.
All her vampire abilities are shutting down.
No, no, no, but this is good news.
-What?
-It's incurable.
She'll be gone within a week.
-Oh, but there must be something we can do.
-To cure a vampire illness, you'll need a specialist
in the dark arts-- an alchemist, someone who's
dared to probe into the dark places,
no matter how twisted and wrong.
-Renfield.
He means Renfield.
-Sir?
-Mistress Ingrid is very ill.
-Oh.
Would she like a cup of tea?
[sighing]
-A little bit iller than that.
It's a shame.
I'm going to have to bring his memory back.
-Sir?
-Look into my eyes.
-I thought you said you couldn't do that.
-I lied.
When I click my fingers--
-For four years, this squeaky-clean
imbecile has been tottering around--
-Do you want him back or not?
You will open your eyes, and you will
see things as they really are.
And you will remember.
-Did it work?
-Oh, look!
Cockroach.
A cockroach!
[chortling]
-Ugh.
-Hmm.
Oh, it's off.
-The old Renfield's back.
-Well, this calls for a celebration.
Renfield, open a bottle of someone red and full-bodied.
-Yes, master.
-Not yet.
Ingrid's more important.
-Since when?
[ingrid wheezing]
-Oh, very well.
Do what you must.
-Yes, master.
-And your insolence needs correcting.
[giggling]
[loud burp]
-Mr. Count, please don't do that.
Are you trying to give me a heart attack?
-Oh.
Don't joke about such matters.
-So what's the problem?
-You said Vlad needed more confidence in school.
I've hired a private tutor.
And, well, I've worked out a time table.
Vlad will only need to miss your most stupid, pointless classes.
-Sport, Personal and Social Development, Home Economics.
These subjects aren't stupid or pointless.
-Well, I hardly think Vlad need concern himself with-- cookery.
-I thought we had an understanding.
-Oh, we do.
-Vlad may be your son, but he is my student.
And in my school, he must do things my way.
-Of course.
But on this occasion, I suggest you make an exception.
-I'm sorry.
Vlad must follow the rules like everyone else.
-Really?
-I'm afraid we'll have to agree to disagree.
-Miss McCauley, are you sure?
Hmm?
-Quite sure.
Thank you.
-Fascinating.
I'm disappointed in you, Vlad.
-You always are.
-First Ingrid, then the half-fang, and now Renfield.
You lack discipline.
You're insubordinate.
And worst of all, you never listen to me.
-You never listen to me.
-I don't need to.
I know what's good for you.
And like it or not, you have to learn
in order to fulfill your potential.
That's why I've arranged a tutor for you.
-Whew.
OK.
I'm ready.
You be the tutor.
-You want me to improvise?
-Just come over here.
-All right.
But I'm really not sure of my motivation.
Ah.
This is like the cage which trapped your father.
-Actually, it is that one, with modifications.
-An excellent booby trap.
Of course, it is ineffective against hell hounds.
-One wrong move, and that tutor is going to be toast.
Show time.
[knocking]
[door creaking open]
-Go on, open it.
I wonder who they've sent.
-Not exactly what I was expecting.
-Good evening, Count Dracula.
And you must be Vladimir.
I'm Goody McEldrich.
-We are honored, madam.
-Are we?
-Goody McEldrich is infamous.
-You're talking to Transylvania's
greatest expert in shape-shifting.
-So why'd you choose that one?
[SNICKERING
Why'd you choose--
-You were right to call upon me.
This boy needs discipline.
-Yes.
I'm afraid I've been too soft with the lad.
-You certainly have.
I smell breather.
-Oh, that'd be Renfield.
-The Chosen One should not harbor breathers in his lair.
The only good breather is a drained breather.
-Actually, I quite like them.
-We'll soon cure you of that.
Let the training begin.
-Good luck, Vladdy.
Oh, and by the way, I took the liberty
of disabling your little booby trap.
-Dad, I--
-I'm waiting.
-Off you go, Vlad.
-You too, Count Dracula.
His un-vampiric behavior is your fault.
You need to be taught a lesson in parenting.
[roaring]
-(CHUCKLING) Put them away.
-Hmm?
-Boys who answer back get put on the naughty step.
-What?
-She sounds just like my old nanny Clontarf.
-Fingers on fangs!
Now who's going to tell me where the training room is?
Lesson One the relationship between us and them.
Now, breathers have feelings just like us.
They experience pain just as we do.
Which is why it's so much fun to play with your food.
-I hope you're paying attention, Vlad.
-What did I say about fingers on fangs?
-I was just speaking-- ow.
-Silence.
Don't make me use this again.
-You can't just go around hitting people.
-You're right.
The next time one of you is naughty,
I shall cut off a limb.
-What?
-Oh, don't be such a baby.
Where do you keep all your weapons?
-Weapons/
-Your-- your swords, your axes.
-Over here.
Please.
-Over here?
Hmm, but it's empty.
[machinery grinding]
-I don't see any--
-Take a closer look.
[screaming]
[splash]
[machinery grinding]
-Of course, I set up my own booby trap,
the old false cupboard garlic pit wheeze.
-I always wondered what happened to Nanny Clontarf.
[distant scream]
-Wake up.
-What?
-Drink this.
-You're trying to kill me.
I never thought you'd have the guts.
-I'm trying to save you.
-Why?
-You're the only sister I've got.
Please.
-If it'll shut you up.
[choking]
-Well, it's certainly an improvement.
I can see less of her face.
[cackling]
-Renfield, what the blood and garlic was that?
-An unfortunate side effect, Master Vlad.
I must have made an error with the formula.
-Well, put it right.
[door opening]
[laughter]
-Vladdy!
Let me introduce you to your new tutor, my old hunting partner,
Baron Von Racalud, the best wingman I ever had.
-So are you a chip off the old fang?
-He's a good, honest, decent boy.
-Hmm.
So you want me to change all that?
-Oh, could you?
-No problem.
But first of all, fancy a cold one?
-I thought you'd never ask.
I've got our old favorite chilling in the cellar.
-Not the--
-(TOGETHER) Baroness of Bucharest!
-The '92 vintage.
-You read my mind.
-Brilliant.
THE COUNT: The Baroness.
[glasses clinking]
Bottoms up!
[laughter]
-Die, cursed creature, or I shall pierce
your heart with my sword of vengeance.
Then I said to him, not likely, mate.
This shirt is Armani.
[chuckling]
-Oh, wow.
What did you do?
-Turned to smoke, of course.
-No.
-Left him grasping at thin air, and attacked from behind.
Got my fangs in his throat quicker than you could say bon
appetit.
[polite chuckle]
-Now, where would you like to start?
-I would love to learn to smoke like you.
-I will show you how it's done.
-Wow, that is smoking.
-Isn't it?
Now observe how all the particles
are perfectly detached.
-Whatever.
[vacuum cleaner roaring]
[von racalud choking]
VON RACALUD: What is this?
You-- you tricked me!
-Yep.
And there's a nugget of argentellium
in there as well to stop you turning back.
VON RACALUD: Oh!
Oh, you will pay for this insult to my honor.
And the dry cleaning.
-Have a nice trip back to Transylvania.
VON RACALUD: You will wish you'd never been unborn!
[ingrid choking]
-Surely she's dust by now.
[door creaking open]
-How's Racalud?
Is he teaching you some new moves?
-He's gone back to Transylvania.
An important package to attend to, apparently.
How's she doing?
-She seems to be getting worse.
-Time for your medicine.
I promise this will sort out your facial hair problem.
[choking]
-You look divine, Mistress Ingrid!
[laughter]
-That's it!
I've had enough of you torturing my sister.
-You're no fun.
-I have to go back to school.
You stay here. Get some rest.
I'll be back to check on her in an hour or so.
You look after Ingrid.
And the next potion you make had better work, or else.
-(FRENCH ACCENT) Good afternoon.
My name is Bertrand de du Fortunesa.
-(ENGLISH ACCENT) Sorry.
Uh, Bertrand.
-(FRENCH ACCENT) Ber-trand!
-Oh, great.
You're one of them.
Look, I don't care what Dad's told you.
-I've never met your father.
-But he sent for you, though.
-Nobody sent for me.
I came to find the Chosen One, he
who can open "Praedictum Impaver."
Vladimir Dracula, it is my solemn duty and honor
to present you with-- "Praedictum Impaver."
-Right.
So what does it do?
-I don't really know.
I believe that when the Chosen One opens it,
vampires will rule the world as we did in ancient times.
-Right.
Well, I think I'll just leave it shut.
-You don't understand.
Opening it is not a choice.
It's your duty.
That is, if you are who you say you are.
-So let me get this right.
If I don't open it, then I'm not the Chosen One.
-You must open it to prove your claim.
-Got it.
[sighing]
-Medicine time.
-You can't give her more potions.
You'll kill her.
[ingrid choking]
-The half-fang's right.
I don't think she can take anymore.
-Pity.
A great pity.
Oh, well.
I suppose we'd better do what needs to be done.
-What do you mean?
-This is a fairly common blood allergy.
Like her, it's very painful and irritating.
But unlike her, it's easy to get rid of.
Renfield, sort it out.
-There's a cure.
There's been a cure all along.
-Transylvanian bat vomit does the job every time.
-You're sick and wrong.
-Oh, thank you, Vladdy.
-Open wide.
-What did I ever do to you?
-Gloated at my execution.
Plotted to overthrow me.
Left me do die.
-Hmm, that.
-Welcome back, daughter.
I loathe you as much as ever.
-What about this?
Get rid of it now!
It actually works.
-I should inform you, side effects may include drowsiness.
I-- I promise, Master Vlad.
When she wakes up, she'll be on the road to recovery.
-Oh, she'd better be.
-Vladimir Dracula!
Neither of us can escape our destiny.
[laughter]
-She's a monster.
She's not human!
-The book, Vlad.
Open the book.
-No.
I'm not touching it.
[snapping fingers]
-As I said, you can't escape your destiny.
-Let me out.
-Or what?
Come on, Dracula.
What are you gonna do about it?
-The Grand High Council won't stand for this.
I'm the Chosen One.
-Yeah, so you say.
You're not the first, you know.
-I thought there could only be one.
-Yeah, but there have been many pretenders.
How do I know that you're different?
-OK, I'm not the Chosen One.
Whatever.
Who cares?
-I do.
You see, the penalty for fraud is death.
-Did you do it?
Did you stake Ingrid?
-I couldn't.
I'm so sorry.
-Don't blame yourself.
The Draculas are just too powerful.
-No.
She was alone.
I had a stake in my hand.
I don't know why I couldn't.
-I do.
You're not a killer.
-If it's any consolation, I won't enjoy these executions.
-Executions?
-Yeah.
Posing as the Chosen One means death for your entire family.
-You touch them, and I'll--
-What?
What will you do?
As I thought.
-Leave my family alone.
-I'm not responsible for the deaths of your family, Vlad.
You are.
-Think of me as one of them.
-I'm never going to hurt you.
You can't make me.
-Then I have to go away.
I'm changing, Sis.
I'm too dangerous to be around.
-I'll save you.
I promise.
-Just-- look after yourself.
-You too.
-No!
[growling]
-What just happened?
-I had to force you to show your power.
And look what you have become!
And this is just the beginning.
One day, you will have power over all vampires.
-Great.
I'll start by getting rid of you.
-If you like.
What will you do next time?
You've got enemies, Vlad.
The Slayers Guild want the Chosen One dead.
So do half the High Council.
-I can look after myself.
-Maybe you can, if that's all that matters to you.
Good luck.
[sighing]
-Wait.
What exactly is it you think you can teach me?
-Everything.
I've been preparing for 400 years.
With me as your tutor, you can force
all vampires to do your bidding.
You can decide the destiny of vampire kind.
-And I'd still be able to do things my way, right?
-Of course.
It begins.
-Yeah.
I guess it does.
[music playing]
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Young Dracula - BBC Series - Season 3 Ep 2 "The Enemy Within"

3532 Folder Collection
yi published on February 3, 2015
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