-Grand High Vampire Staked by Boris Dracula, whose takeover

attempt failed when he wore the Crown of Power

and mysteriously turned to dust.

Because of Boris, he's all over the papers, Zoltan.

-Except the "Sun Block."

Look, the Lice Girls are getting back together.

-What was that?

I thought I saw something.

-Yes, it's called lightning Master Vlad.

-Vladimir Dracula.

-And that's called thunder.

-You are the chosen one.

You must take your rightful place on the throne.

-I'm sorry, Your Grandness, but I really

think there's been a mistake.

I have trouble getting my homework in on time.

-Hush.

The time is almost upon us.

You will know you are the chosen one when--

-When what?

-Come on, Vladdy, we have to go tonight.

The heads of the Vampire clans are gathering downstairs.

The ceremony is about to begin.

-What's wrong Master Vlad?

You look like you've seen a ghost.

-I don't think our plan to rescue Mom is going to work.

The place is swarming with vampires.

-There's the Count, Ingrid, and Will.

Three is not a swarm.

-I'm telling you, it's wall tall fang down there.

-Jonno, now's not a time for a visit

from Mr. Cowardly Custard.

[laughter]

-Do you want some humble pie with that custard?

-Tonight, we unveil a new leader from our majestic throng

of night feeders.

Blood brothers and sisters, I present to you the crown

of power, carved from the bones of victims

from the dawn of time.

Come, come, come, come, come, come.

-Did you see that?

-Yeah.

Renfield is such a show-off.

[laughter]

-To reveal the identity of our new Grand High Vampire,

I shall require a drop of blood.

[screeching]

[hiss]

-Please don't say my name, please don't say my name.

[scoff]

-As if.

Chieftain McDonald.

[bagpipe music]

Do you solemnly swear to be evil, bloodthirsty,

and cruel now and forever more.

-Aye, I do.

-What?

-Was it something I said?

-It's the prophecy.

-What prophecy?

-Some old vampire voodoo, apparently.

When the bloodlines start dropping like flies,

it's a sign this special vampire's coming.

The chosen one.

-There is no proof of it.

-Well, let's hope the bloodline finds someone less combustible

this time.

[laughter]

Jiang Shi.

King.

I like it.

Do you solemnly swear to-- you do.

All right.

-It looks like that vampire voodoo might be true after all.

-So who's going to find themselves third time lucky?

[throat clear]

Ha!

Count Dracula!

Well, it's been a long night.

We're all tired.

Why don't we get some rest and something to eat

and I'll be crowned tomorrow night?

Great.

That's decided, then.

-I can't believe Dad chickened out.

-Well, you can't blame him.

That crown is deadly.

-Exactly.

I'll be devastated at our loss, of course.

But as the new head of the Dracula family,

I'm sure I'll get over it.

-You will inherit the castle?

-And everything else.

-You are so bad.

-I know.

Dad's going to wear that crown if it's the last thing he does.

-Ready for action, Jonno?

-Let's go.

-No, wait.

Let's make a pact.

Promise me you'll slay me if I get bitten.

-I promise.

And you'll slay me if I get bitten?

-I promise.

-What if we both get bitten at the same time.

-These pacts are trickier than you think.

Look, this is our best chance to save your mother.

It's you and me against two dozen vampires.

We're going to need more weapons.

-Why do I have to be chosen one?

Why can't it be like PE where I'm always last to be picked?

-Master, you can't have seen the Grand High Vampire.

I would have sensed his ghostly presence

with my finely tuned animal instincts.

-It's bad enough turning into a vampire

when I'm 16, never mind a special one.

I won't wear that crown.

-Then you father is doomed.

Not if I stop the coronation.

GRAHAM (OFFSCREEN): You're a tomato.

And you two can be the grapes.

-I wanted to be the carrot.

-Mm hmm hmm.

Chloe's the carrot.

-I suppose you're the banana.

-It's not fair.

-The healthy eating theme for the Scout Cabaret was my idea,

so I get first pick.

-There's no way I'm wearing this in public.

-Of course you are.

We need five pieces of fruit and veg.

We're the five a day family.

-You're coming, and that's an end to it.

-Over my dead pineapple.

-Master, I have come up with a fool-proof plan to save you.

I have made an exact replica of the Crown of Power.

-Oh.

That is an utterly stup-- stupendous idea.

With a fake crown, I could be Grand High

Vampire without taking any risks.

Renfield, you're not such a mindless,

slobbering idiot after all.

-Oh, thank you master.

Dun nun!

-Dad, we shouldn't be here.

We've been kicked out the Slayer's Guild,

and that includes this place. -Please speak name.

-Eat garlic and die.

-I was only saying.

-Voice recognized.

Access granted.

-Grab as many weapons as you can.

-Reach for the skies, ladies.

Now turn round.

Special Agent Kurt Moller, Slayers' Guild

Tactical Division.

Number of kills 989.

-I'm--

-Eric Van Helsing, Slayer's Guild field operative.

Number of kills, zero.

Discharged for ineffective conduct.

Nice work with the passphrase, though.

You snuck that one by the tech boys.

-We just came for our weapons.

-They're not weapons.

They're antiques.

Stakes and crossbows.

No wonder you didn't bag any fang jobs.

Now this is a weapon-- UV grenade launcher.

It's like having the sun in the palm of your hand.

Kurt fired and the intruders literally wet their pants.

Artistic license, I'm writing my memoirs.

-Yeah, well I'll stick with what I know.

Thanks.

-Your funeral.

-Are you going to slay the Count?

-Count's old news.

I'm here to take down the Chosen One.

-Come on, Robin.

Stop sulking.

Your dad's gone through a lot of trouble for this.

-Oh.

Sorry.

-Well, well.

Naughty, naughty.

-How dare you keep me here like this.

-Well, I think it's rather cozy.

-You're a monster.

-Vlad?

-Shh.

It's me.

Quick, over here.

-Is this everyone?

-Someone to sleep in the crypt.

-Show some respect for your new Grand High Vampire.

Or shouldn't we say last respects?

[laughter]

-Your dad's going to be the Grand High Vampire.

-Not if I can help it.

-Master!

Someone's stolen the crown!

-Really?

-Oh, really.

-Oh.

Oh, dear.

Never mind.

[hiss]

I mean find it.

Find it now.

-I don't know what to do, Robin.

Do you think I'm the Chosen One?

-Don't be daft.

You're a rubbish vampire.

There's no way it's you.

-Thanks.

-Maybe I'm the Chosen One.

-Robin, don't.

Ah!

You should see the look on your face.

-Ha ha ha, that wasn't funny.

-Oh, come on.

It was a bit funny.

-What if the prophecy's true?

-There's only one way to find out.

-Something tells me the map was wrong.

This isn't the dungeon.

-It's the crypt.

If your mother's in here, we're already too late.

-Dad, I've got a bad

-Yeah, me too.

-You're not supposed to say that.

You're supposed to say it's fine,

or don't worry we're in no danger.

What's that?

-Sounded like a coffin opening.

Don't worry, we're in no danger.

[screaming]

[laughter]

[hissing]

OK, maybe that wasn't such a great idea.

-Playtime's over children.

Dad wants his crown back.

-Don't give it to him.

He'll die.

-Yes, it's tragic.

Don't forget to bring a dustpan and brush.

-Stay here.

It's too dangerous.

And I mean it this time.

-Careful getting in.

We don't want any slip ups.

-You know Graham, I don't think your humor "a-peels" to them.

-Enough of the fruit jokes.

They're rotten.

[laughter]

-Dad?

There's a problem.

-Whoa.

Robin really needs to start shaving.

-Stay here.

I'm going to the castle.

-You haven't got time.

You'll be late for the Scout Cabaret.

-I'm not letting that lot get their teeth into my son.

-Oh, not this ridiculous vampire nonsense again.

-Uh, actually, Dad's right.

-Right.

That's it.

I've had enough.

Everybody into the van.

We're going to sort this out once and for all.

-Kurt waited in the shadows like a spider waiting for a fly.

-Dad, if you put on that crown, we're

going to be sweeping you up like the others.

-Rubbish.

They were weak.

It won't destroy Dad.

He's strong and powerful, destined

to be the greatest leader the vampires have ever known.

-Silence, I've made my decision.

Proceed with the ceremony.