Name: Trump Declares Victory in Iran War, Votes by Mail & Jimmy Chats with Jeffrey Epstein Lookalike
Uploaded: 2026-03-28T21:39:23.000Z
Duration: 16 min 56 s
Description: Thousands of YouTube videos with English-Chinese subtitles! Now you can learn to understand native speakers, expand your vocabulary, and improve your pronunciation...

Adverbs of degree

Just now in Wall Street, just watching the show, like you're just coming to the show.

We are, uh, coming to you from our headquarters in Los Angeles, home of the 2028 Summer Olympic Games.

I'm excited about the Olympics, coming to you guys.

Guillermo, you and I, we're gonna go to all the canoeing events, every one of them.

You know, even though the Olympics are more than two years away, we now have the official color palette of the games, finally.

I've been waiting for this official color palette since they announced it, and here it is.

They say it was inspired by the Super Bloom here in California, which is something I've never heard of.

Does you ever hear can you smoke the Super Bloom?

But put that back up, because I, I hopefully President Trump's gonna like it.

It's got it's got the orange of his skin, the yellow of his hair, and

You're gonna learn more about the plan for the Olympics over the coming months, but

I have a gr I think I have a great idea of for who should be the announcer at the opening ceremonies.

Welcome, Albania, Antigua and Barbuda, Aruba, Bosnia and Herzegovina, Bangladesh, Belize and Bolivia, Burundi, Cabo Verde, Congo, Costa Rica, Dominican Republic, Ecuador, Equatorial Guinea, Estonia, France, Gambia, Georgia, Ghana and Guatemala here in Washington, DC.

You remember that, um remember the song "Cocomo" by the Beach Boys?

It would be fun to hear her do that, right?

Greetings, Israel, Kenya, Kosovo, Lithuania, Malta, Malawi, Montenegro, Morocco, Nigeria, North Macedonia, Palau, Panama and of course Paraguay.

I mean, why would they make her announce the names of all of the country?

She could have just said, "Welcome, everyone, but

Iran." Instead, instead they put her through a whole Duolingo to oh, she's not finished?

Hello, Poland, Romania, Senegal, Serbia, Seychelles, Sierra Leone, Slovenia, St.

And then at the end of the summit, she said goodbye to them all in reverse.

Meanwhile, her husband was in Memphis yesterday.

He took a VIP tour of Graceland while he was there.

then Yelvis hosted a roundtable to catch us up on his efforts to crack down on crime, including the most heinous crime of all, putting your ballots in a mailbox.

You know, um, brought to my attention today that we're the only country that doesn't that does mail-in voting.

He prefers in-person cheating, preferably with a porn star shortly after his wife gives birth.

And he keeps saying it was brought to his attention today that we're the only country that does mail-in voting.

That is when is somebody gonna step in and tell him that is not true?

All the countries that have mail have mail-in voting.

So okay, so here's where the real magic comes in.

He voted by mail today for the special election in Florida.

He's really Donald Trump claiming he wants to protect election integrity is like Bill Cosby telling you he'll watch your drink for you.

I mean, next we're gonna find out that his blow dryer is powered by a windmill or something.

You know, I mentioned this last week, and now it is official.

The Trump administration is shelling out a billion dollars of our money to a French energy company to cancel construction of wind turbines in North Carolina and New York.

He's paying this company to not build these renewable energy farms because he has this weird hatred of what he calls windmills.

He says they're unsightly, they're ugly monsters, they're losers, a con job, they're bad for the environment, and

they make a lot of noise, which is exactly how most of us feel about him, allegedly.

Do you know where the windmill was invented?

Persians invented the windmill between 500 and 900 AD, and

now he wants to destroy them for it, I guess.

And the manboob of Lamancha again declared victory in Iran today.

He said, "This war has been won, and yet we're still fighting it." Or are we?

According to the president, there was some major progress yesterday thanks to a mysterious gift.

They did something yesterday that was amazing, actually.

They gave us a present, and the president arrived today.

And it was a very big present worth a tremendous amount of money.

And I'm not gonna tell you what that present is, but

they said they were gonna give it, so that meant one thing to me: we're dealing with the right people.

They gave him either a present or a prize?

What kind of what kind of present did they send?

I mean, what is he sure it's safe to open this present when he gets it?

Because who would have ever guessed he could be easily manipulated by expensive gifts?

Maybe they gave him a medal that says "World's Greatest Enemy" or something.

I can't wait to find out what this incredibly valuable prize could be.

You know, one thing we can be grateful for is that the president surrounds himself with great minds, like the former mayor of New York, Rudy Giuliani, who gave us this update on the plan to reopen the Strait of Hormuz.

We're gonna we're gonna just close off with some kind of a we're gonna close off with just a Well, with, with just a what?

Mayor Mayor Giuliani, you're on television right now.