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You met him at orchestra practice and he said he was an avid pianist, you misheard him and you both had a good laugh.
After that he asked you on a date and that one date led to two and before you realized it, you've been dating this guy for a year and lately, the magic's gone.
Maybe you've just started to notice how loudly he eats soup.
So you've decided.
It is time to break up.
But how in the world are you gonna have that conversation?
Hey everyone welcome to Wellcast.
This week we're talking about that awful discussion that comes at the eleventh hour of a relationship.
We're gonna give you our seven-step plan for making a clean break between you and your partner.
Download this worksheet on your password-protected mobile device and keep it handy for reference on the big day.
You ready?
Step one: first things first before anything else, you need to make sure that you want to go through with this breakup.
If you're not happy in the relationship, that is a huge red flag.
Ask yourself the following questions: do you communicate well?
Does your partner accept you as you are?
Are you open with your partner or do you find yourself keeping secrets from him?
Do you look forward to seeing him or do you find yourself making excuses to avoid him?
Step two: figure out exactly what you're going to say to your boyfriend.
Odds are the first question he's gonna ask is: "Why are you doing this?"
So on your worksheet, write down your reason—or reasons.
Don't go overboard.
It can be as simple as: I no longer have feelings for you or I don't think I can trust you anymore.
Step three: once you've committed to actually breaking up and have figured out exactly what you wanna say, plan out a maximum three hour time period for the daunting task.
These three hours we'll give him enough time to process but keep the conversation from spiralling into a loop rehashing the same points over and over again.
Step four: make plans for directly after the conversation.
Maybe ask a friend to catch a movie or schedule a haircut.
Giving yourself a concrete out will help you leave any difficult situations and having something to do afterward will give you time to process the breakup but keep you from dwelling on.
Step five : alright, the time has come.
You've blocked out three hours, scheduled band practice for afterward written down what you're gonna to say, so say it.
Remember this conversation is gonna be painful for him and you.
Nothing you say is gonna change that fact.
Be honest but sympathetic, don't go overboard and don't get angry, just say enough so that you can explain your reasons for breaking up.
Step six : when it's over, its over.
Don't lead your partner on.
Tell your now ex-boyfriend that you won't be contacting him and ask him to respect this wish.
Listen, you won't be doing him any favors by drawing the breakup out or leaving a door open for a relationship further down the line.
You're breaking up for a reason, remember?
So be sure that there are no emotional loose ends.
Step seven: the stuff exchange.
This should be a very brief meeting where you can both exchange belongings, but that's it.
No talks of getting back together and no cementing the breakup.
This meeting should take place in public so you're not tempted to have another long conversation, and if you're worried take a friend.
You've just gone through one of the harder conversations you'll have to have for a long time, you'll probably feel low for a little while and that's okay.
Look, just because a relationship is over, doesn't mean it was meaningless.
In fact, the reason you're feeling so crummy is because that relationship was an important part of you growing up.
Still feeling a little down after your breakup?
Well, check out our breakup playlist here, specifically curated by the Wellcast team.
To recap: you have decided to break up with your boyfriend—first make sure you actually wanna do this.
Next, commit a time period up to three hours, no longer.
And work out what you're gonna say before you get into the situation.
When you're there, be honest, but be sympathetic with your now ex-boyfriend, make it clear that your decision is final and ask him not to contact you for a little bit.
If you both have stuff to exchange make plans to briefly meet in a couple days in a public place, so you can do that.
Tweet us at watchwellcast, email as watchwellcast@gmail.com or leave a comment down below
We'll see you next time!