Subtitles section Play video Print subtitles Love means never having to say you're sorry. The quote may be famous, but we here Wellcast disagree. The ability to pluck up the courage to sincerely apologize is one of the most important skills you learn in life and especially becomes handy with the people you love. Of course ,apologizing can be terrifying. It's the kind of thing you build up into a huge deal the kind of thing you lose sleep over and perhaps continue to put it off We all do . And this week we took a viewer suggestion from SpiloSpud We're gonna walk you through that difficult awkward sweaty moment when you have to take a deep breath and say I'm sorry. It turns out people who were able to bite the bullet and apologize are emotionally healthier than those who can't . A study done at Grant mcewan University and then found that people with low self esteem feel worse after conflict and are less likely to apologize for it. On the other hand, there's a strong correlation between strong self-esteem and the ability to apologize . Here's one more thing a University of Illinois study found that people who apologized tend to fare better financially than those who don't Are you still putting it off? Alright! But just remember what William Shakespeare said Cowards die many times before their deaths What old Will means here is putting off an apology is a lot more painful than actually apologizing Let's get to our four steps, pause and print this worksheet at watchwellcast dot com. Step 1:Assess the situation. Making this apology is gonna be like climbing a mountain you wanna survey the trend and watch out for any big rocks and boulders that are going to be especially hard to get over so first on your wellcast worksheet, simply write down the whole story of what ever happened. For example I came home late one evening after an exhausting day of work and my roommate was eating my doritos. I completely blew up at her, she then proceeded to weep for two hours Step 2 write out your game plan and stick to it. We're big fans at scripting out what we're going to say beforehand here at wellcast it takes a little bit of the nerves away from actually, you know, doing the thing. So on your well cast worksheet try writing out a practice apology speech make sure you hit the following points when you're giving your apology Acknowledge what you did wrong and take responsibility for it Hey I shouldn't have flipped out, all right , that was a completely unfair and ridiculous response to you eating my Doritos. Say a genuine I'm sorry, and don't tamper with any buts this means none of this: I am sorry that you felt that way or hey I'm sorry but you really need to respect my snack food. Hey, don't go overboard though you shouldn't have to apologize for your whole existence just be specific to the actual incident. Don't try to rationalize your actions but don't be afraid of explaining your emotions at the time be honest, have you been really stressed out lately? have you for some reason developed a very emotional attachment to toritoes? okay, as long as you're not using these reasons as justification for your actions honesty can't hurt. Step 3: An apology should be a conversation not a monologue. Yeah yeah yeah okay I know I just told you to write down a script but that can only take you so far after you say what you've prepared, allow them to express their feelings and actually listen. Step 4: Make amends So technically the hard parts over right? You've actually broken the ice and said what you wanted to say they've responded but you don't wanna fall into that category of talking the talk and not walking the walk so at the end of your worksheet write down several ways that you're going to make an effort to change your actions for the better okay let's recap wellcasters .Today you learn four steps to getting up the courage to actually give a sincere apology you learn to assess the situation like a mountaineer write down your apology beforehand, engage in a fruitful conversation with the person to whom you're apologizing and you learn how to try to keep yourself from making the same mistake again.