Subtitles section Play video Print subtitles I've had a really good time tonight. Mm-hmm. You know, I rarely connect with someone this much on the first date Me neither I've had a really good time too, you know Are you gonna eat that bread? I just like the smell You make me laugh Mm-hmm. Would you like to move over to the couch? Maybe I'll just turn down the lights a little. How about all the way? Wow cool poster or should I say groovy poster? So, uh, yeah, where were we? Are those your teeth? Oh You can see them, huh? Yes, they're insanely white. Yeah, I I did that for you What's the matter with you Me you've got a black light. It's 1999. Oh my god The pages are stuck together Chandler Oh my god, she she made half an English trifle in Half a shepherd's pie Mm-hmm This is so good that I'm gonna go enjoy it on the balcony So I can enjoy the view whilst I enjoy my dessert And tell her how good this is for Monica's room I'll help you dial I'm gonna go into the bathroom so I can look at it in the mirror as I eat it Oh, okay. Now, what was that all about? Is it does it not taste good? Let me try it. Oh, no, no All gone So good, maybe Chandler has some left It tastes like feet I I Like it Are you kidding what's not to like custard good jam good meat good Bird just grabbed it And they're trying to fly away with it and and then just dropped it on the street Yes, but if it's any consolation before the bird dropped it he seemed to enjoy it Hey, I hear that you and Joshua are going out to dinner with Ross and Emily and I think that's I think that's really cool Yeah, Rachel. I think you're handling that really well Handling it Handling it. There's nothing to handle. You know, maybe I would have a problem with this if it wasn't for me and Joshua You know, they're not gonna get married anyway What come on they rushed into this thing so fast, it's ridiculous I mean, they're gonna be engaged for like what a year Somewhere along the way one of them is gonna realize what they've done. They're gonna call the whole thing off I'm telling you you're gonna be dancing at my wedding before you're dancing at theirs. Yeah, well, I don't dance weddings Because weddings are a great place to meet women and when I dance I look like this I Mean So, what are you guys doing four weeks from today nothing nothing I am Free Great because Emily and I are getting married in a month What? Yep in a month. Yeah, you mean you mean 30 days? Yeah From now. Yeah Rachel she and Phoebe took the stripper to the hospital Did you know Chandler kissed Rachel what when was this 1987 the weekend you guys visited me at school. Oh my god, that's wild Yeah, but it was like a million years ago. So it doesn't matter Well, it matters to me why because the night you kissed Rachel was the night I kissed Rachel for the very first time you kissed her that night to two guys in one night Oh, I thought she became a slut after she got her nose fixed Seriously where did this happen? Okay after you told me she was passed out in our room I went in there to make sure she was alright. She was lying on my bed all buried in people's coats Well, I went to kiss her on the forehead, you know, but it was so dark. I accidentally got her lips I started to pull away, but then I felt her start to kiss me back It was only for a second, but it was amazing. And now now I find out that you kissed her first What bed did you say she was on mine? I'm pretty sure I put her on my bed. No, she was definitely on my bed Why would I kiss a girl and then put her on your bed? Well, then who was on my bed You were under the pile of coats I was the pile of coats oh My god You were my first kiss with Rachel You take half and I take half. Well, that's not fair. You've already had some. Oh, no, not you know what? I think Monica would be very interested to know that you called her cheesecake dry and mealy. What do we use to split it? Okay All right pick a half okay, well this side looks bigger I'm gonna split it. I'm gonna split it. I'm gonna split it. I'm gonna split it This side looks bigger More crust on this side So even if I measure for God's sake just pick a piece There you go enjoy your half my friend, but that is it no sharing no switching And don't come crying to me if you eat your piece too fast Oh All right, you're gonna give me some of your piece oh No, no, no switching. No sharing. Don't come crying to me. Ha ha ha I may just sit here and have my cake all day. Just sit here in the hallway and eat my Oh Okay, look there's a piece of doesn't have floor on it stick to your side What do we have took care of everything thanks a lot co-host It take care of everything there's there's plenty of things for you to do uh-huh like what Cups Cups you're giving me cups and ice Cups and ice oh I get to be in charge of cups and ice all right Fine okay, I will be in charge of cups and ice wait a minute. I get ice at the rest I got it Hey check it out a cup hat a banner cup chandelier and the thing that started it off the cup Great job with the cups beeps Why don't you just go out with her And did you notice the ice look we have it all we have crushed cubes and dry watch Mystical No one's eating my Tuscan finger food because they're all filling up on baby snow cones there are snow cones snow cones You know go go thank you My god these pants I'm burning up She wants to snuggle now, what is she trying to kill me? It's like a volcano in here Are you hot no, okay, let's just be me then That was just the pants on the couch um Hey, do you mind if I use your bathroom? Oh Oh My god Hello Joey, it's Ross. I need some help Chandler's not here. Well, you can help me Okay, listen, I'm in Elizabeth's bathroom nice I Got really hot in my leather pants So I took them off but they must have shrunk from there the sweat or something or or my legs expanded from the heat That is quite a situation Do you see any like powder Sprinkle some of that on your legs. It'll absorb some of the moisture and then you can get your pants back on I See lotion I have lotion without work. Yeah sure throw some of that on there Oh Ross okay. There's still there's still not coming on man and the lotion and the powder have made a paste Really What color is it Well, I'm just if the paste matches the pants you can make yourself a pair of pace pants and she won't know the difference Dude what am I Rachel's here? So good luck, man. Let me know how it works out I have such a problem. Well, your timing couldn't be better. I am putting out fires all over the place I Ross You've been in there for a long time. I'm starting to get kind of freaked out. All right, I'm coming out Hey, can you turn the lights off No, let's just leave the lights on Oh My phone I Had a problem I took the quiz and it turns out I do put career before men Get up what you're my seat. How is this your seat? Because I was sitting there but then you left well, it's not like I went to Spain I went to the bathroom. You knew I was coming back. What's the big deal sit somewhere else? The big deal is I was sitting there last so That's my seat Actually, the last place you were sitting was in there so Guys, you know what? You know what? It doesn't matter because you both have to go get dressed before the big vein in my head pops All right, Ross. I just have to do one thing really quickly. It's not a big deal All right, fine, you know what we'll both sit in the chair I'm so comfortable Me too. In fact, I think I might be a little too Okay, look we have 19 minutes, okay Chandler I want you to go and change Okay, and then when you come back Joey will go change and he'll have vacated the chair. Okay. Okay. All right Fine, I'm going when I get back. It's chair city and I'm the guy who's sitting in a chair All right, you will notice that I am fully dressed I in turn have noticed that you are not So in the words of a a mil get out of my chair deal hole Okay What are you doing we said I had to give you the chair you didn't see anything about the cushions The cushions are the essence of the chair. That's right. I'm taking the essence We'll be back. Oh, there's nobody in the room Where's my underwear Come on, come on what you took his underwear. He took my essence. Okay, hold on Joey why can't you just wear the underwear you're wearing now because I'm not wearing any underwear now Okay, then why do you have to wear underwear tonight it's a rented tux, okay, I'm not gonna go commando in another man's fatigue Well, then it looks like somebody's gonna have to give somebody back his cushions Okay, you hide my clothes. I'm gonna do the exact opposite to you What are you what are you gonna show me my clothes hey opposite is opposite He's got nothing Okay, buddy boy, here it is You hide my clothes. I'm wearing everything you want. Oh My god That is so not the opposite of taking somebody's underwear Look at me. I'm Chandler. Could I be wearing any more clothes? Maybe if I wasn't going commando