Subtitles section Play video Print subtitles Please cancel, please cancel, please. I have so much laundry to do. Hope she cancels, hope she cancels. So much work to do. - I hope she cancels. So many emails to respond to. She canceled. Friendships in my twenties were easy, there was an abundance of time for long walks, all day hangs, spontaneous adventures. But as we get older and our Google Calendar increases its color coordination and responsibility, it's getting harder and harder to have those kinds of luxurious hangs without intense planning and preparation. What about Monday from 12:31:45? Could it be on the East side? Shit. I have to be in Santa Monica by 2:15. Thursday evening? How late, I have a Zoom at eight. Then we have to meet at nine and that's pumpkin time. My nighttime routine is essential not to activate insomnia. We could try the first weekend in September for a getaway. That could work. Yeah, that sounds great. Okay, great. So 2023 September in the CAL. Perfect. And these days, I feel like social media gives us a false sense of being close to people. You know, we often know what's happening with our friends because of their status updates rather than actual disclosures in person. I'm engaged. Fire emoji, fire emoji, fire emoji. Meeting up now kind of feels like having a quickie, stealing away from our grown up lives for a down and dirty happy hour. And something I found that has radically changed my friendship quality time while still letting me have a balanced life is what we call "twin time" or a "do as you do day". Mundane tasks like going to the grocery store together, taking the same workout classes or having work dates have allowed my best friends and I had to bond during our very busy lives. And of course, you know, we'll still carve out the occasional happy hour, weekend trip or intentional hang that is fully devoted to quality time, but we've taken the pressure off and just fully leaned into friendships that allow us to be casual and disjointed and go with whatever flow life takes us through. Okay, so how about Michelle you drive and then we'll drop you off at the doctor's office. - Perfect. We'll work on our laptops nearby until we're ready to pick you up and then go to CVS. - Love it. I have my shopping list. Okay. And then you two will take me to my video session and then you'll wait and work. So many emails. I just got seven more. Okay, and then we'll get massages and drinks because we earned it. And more often than not when we have twin time and do these errands together, I found that we often stumble into more adventures. Like last Christmas, Michelle and I went to go drop off this Christmas gift to a guy's house. I had dated him but I wasn't dating him anymore, but I bought him this like very specific jacket that was like tailored to his body and I couldn't return it, so I was like, let's just bumble on over there together 'cause I know he's out of town. And we were talking and Michelle was like, "I think you should stay in the car just in case." I was like, okay, so we Facetime, and she went to drop off the gift, and lo and behold, on his doorstep, he showed up. And we were on Facetime and I just hear his voice go hi and then Michelle's really high voice goes hi and then on Facetime, I say "xxxx" really loud, so she hangs up on me, I duck into the passenger seat. Michele power walked around the building, jumped into the car, we both screamed and drove away. It was like a really great adrenaline rush. And then we called Melissa. Oh my God, we just ran into Jade. Whoa! Where? In front of his house. You know, it was like stupid and obvious and not coincidental at all when I'm telling it, but to us, it was prime adventure time out of a boring, mundane, errand. And a lot of our fun wild moments have been birthed from doing these errands together. That just needed to get done, made into a prime adventure by the company we kept. I'm Anna Akana and thank you the Patreon who supported today's video.