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This isn't your home.
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What are you talking about?
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This is the Umbrella Academy.
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This is the Sparrow Academy.
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Shit.
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When we jumped here, we created a time paradox.
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Our little paradox brought forth the freaking Kugelblitz.
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What the hell is a Kugelblitz?
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Essentially, we're screwed.
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Everybody else could see Ben, right?
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Yeah, and he's a complete dickhead.
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They're all dickheads.
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Dickheads who can fight.
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Next person to say "dickhead" is getting a punch to the throat.
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-Dickhead. -Dickhead.
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We caused a paradox, and that paradox is swallowing things.
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How long do we have?
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Four, maybe five days before the rest of existence is blitzed.
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Not to mention we've been replaced by a bunch of blobs, and cubes, and birds, and shit.
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Your team's good.
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But I don't think you're better than me.
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I ended the world twice.
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And you? You're just meat and spandex.
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Dad didn't adopt us as babies, but those babies still existed here.
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So, if you ever see your other self...
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-Kill them. -Sleep with them.
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... avoid them.
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- What the hell is wrong with you two? - Oh, come on.
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As if you wouldn't climb Luther Mountain.
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If I kill you, do we get our Ben back?
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What the hell did you just say?
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What are you, their mascot?
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More like their ringer.
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Been looking for you.
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Spoiler alert.