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  • you don't have to struggle alone.

  • A lot of people want to because they don't want to be an inconvenience to others.

  • And I definitely think that that was a case for me.

  • But if you open up, chances are someone can relate to you and give you advice and tell you all the reasons you are incredibly beautiful, whether or not you think so yourself.

  • When I did ballet for like all my life, I would just see myself in mirrors constantly.

  • So I think that was my most unhealthy.

  • And I think honestly, when I stopped, like, doing valet and doing classes, I felt like that was the beginning of where I could start working on the body dysmorphia that it's just when you see yourself in the mirror is constantly and you're like wearing nothing.

  • You can really just like nit pick yourself to death, which is so unhealthy.

  • But I think when I stopped dancing was the beginning of like okay, I definitely need to heal because the way that I thought about myself when I was dancing was not healthy.

  • I'm not in a place where I can say like Oh yeah, it's over.

  • You know, I think, is an everyday like healing every day and reminding, like being so gentle with yourself.

  • I think you have to work on it every at least I have to work on it every single day.

  • I do think working out in a healthy way has helped a lot because it makes me feel good, makes me feel stronger.

  • But I used to work out constantly.

  • So now I'm trying to do things that I just generally love and not in like an over like a burnout way.

  • Anthony and I my boyfriend, we're gonna start doing, like, dance like zoom bas.

  • It feels joyful to me, so I think that that's the main thing that's been helping.

  • It's like doing classes that are like fun or my trainer is great.

  • For example, he makes my training fun and doesn't push me to a place of burnout, which I think is important because once you have burnout, then it's all over.

  • You're like, Oh man, every every bad thing that I say takes up so much more space in my head, then it should.

  • So it's been such a like every day is up and you know it's very much a whirlwind.

  • And I like when I talk to my friends about this and everyone, a lot of people just say the same thing, But I think that I have really had to, like, double down in the mental health area of it, because I think just the unknowing of everything can get you if you don't really focus on your mental health, can get you really kind of jazzed up.

  • Um, so it's been like I've actively had to make sure that I'm taking care of myself every day because there are days, definitely that I'm like just I just lay in bed and won't do anything.

  • And then I realized like, Oh, I need to do something like meditate or read or whatnot.

  • And then physically, I was just talking about this, That right when the pandemic it I we all just stopped working, and I know for so many of us we were just work, work, work constantly, And so you didn't, at least for me.

  • I didn't have time to really sit and like with myself, and as soon as the pandemic it like I just stopped working, and then I feel like I just was like, Well, the world is over and so I just truly was like, I'll be cash potato forever.

  • And then it was only two, like recently where I started like, No, the world will keep going.

  • And so now I'm like working out and doing all this stuff, but it's definitely not I'm not going to stay here and say, Oh, yeah, it's been, like, awesome myself.

  • Care has been great because I don't know if it truly has up until, like, you know, the plastic, maybe three months where I'm like, Okay, the world isn't going to end now.

  • I feel like we're going to be I feel like there's hope, but who knows I for myself.

  • It's like sometimes when you're feeling very low, you just kind of binge, and that's how it is in the moment.

  • Like I know I've talked about it publicly, but it's like something I think that's feels so private to me.

  • And then I just like, have this moment.

  • This particularly this year.

  • I was like, not alone in this, you know, This year has given us the space, at least myself.

  • I'll always speak for myself, has given me the space to see what really truly matters.

  • Like at the end of the day, I'm so like I love my dog, you know?

  • And I know now the times that I've abandoned myself, and I don't want to ever feel like that again.

  • I don't feel the need to be like I have to say yes to every single thing because mentally that's not healthy.

  • My ultimate self care for me is being with my pup.

  • Well, it's not a puppy anymore about Call her a puppy forever being with my dog Emmy, Um, reading a thriller and not talking to anyone, I think there's like Another thing I've realized this year is I think I'm very much an introvert more than I ever thought, because I thought to myself like, Oh, I'm an introvert that I charge as an introvert And then I expel extroverted energy.

  • But no, I think I'm like, truly like That's why I say, like, I don't mind being alone.

  • I'm not talking to anyone.

  • So that's another thing I've learned this year, and I think that's okay.

  • But as a performer, you have to expel energy and and be brighter or bigger than I think you are in real life because I remember talking to my boyfriend being like Oh my God, I'm exhausted after work, like a year ago or whatever.

  • I'm so exhausted after work and I think it's because I'm just like I feel like I'm putting out so much energy and like trying to be so bright and all these things and like trying to entertain people when I'm not in front of the camera and all these different things, and I'm so tired.

  • But that's because I was like, I think, you know, insecure who I am just as Lana.

  • So that's something that again coming back into, like, shooting and working Now it's like, Mm, I know the way that I acted on set before covid, but it feels different now, and I don't know if it's a good or bad, but I feel great, so I'm just gonna roll with it.

  • People are speaking their truth during the pandemic.

  • I honestly couldn't tell you why I decided to like, be more outspoken, I think I mean, I would like to like my little cousins are dealing with the same things.

  • I want them to know that they're not alone.

  • Like if you're 12 right now, growing up right As a kid, you just like you look up to like I don't tiktok.

  • But I will.

  • Maybe tiktok.

  • But like all these people look so perfect.

  • I'm 23 I'm influenced by it.

  • And I'm like, Oh my God!

  • Like all these models and everyone looks so great, What do I do?

  • But we have to do a better job being kind to ourselves, for sure.

  • I've seen people that I look up to share their mental health journey, particularly recently, and that has helped me feel stronger about talking about where I can feel more confident.

  • But it's a journey.

  • That's why they call it a journey.

  • I think if someone would have come to me asking for advice about yeah, about body dysmorphia and just any sort of mental health, I would just say you have to treat yourself like your best friend and you have to talk to yourself like your your best friend.

  • You would never tell your best friend like the things that you say to yourself and your darkest times.

  • You would never in a million years, and I think that we have to talk to ourselves kindly and gently and treat ourselves like our best friends.

  • Because this is like all we have.

  • Like, this is this mind.

  • And this body is like the one we get.

  • Yeah.

you don't have to struggle alone.

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A2 introvert burnout mental health constantly working stopped

「自分に優しくすること」身体醜形障害を抱える女優ラナ・コンドルのアドバイス。| VOGUE JAPAN

  • 2 1
    林宜悉 posted on 2021/03/01
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