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[ Bells jingling ] ♪♪
-All right, who wants to meet Santa Claus?
-Me! -Me!
-All right. Right this --
-Move, move, move out of the way.
I want to meet Santa. Look at you guys.
Thank you.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Look at you guys.
Look at you guys. Very small. Sad.
[ Laughter ]
Here, hold my Mango-A-Go-Go. Take my pretzel.
-[ Laughs ] -Santa, hello.
-Is that you, Mr. President? -Of course it is.
Look, I don't have much time.
I ditched Eric and Don Jr. at the Disney Store.
Won't be long until they realize
the Thor beanbag chair I left them on isn't their real dad.
[ Laughter ]
-So you came to the mall just to see Santa?
-That's right. Tomorrow's the big impeachment vote.
And people are saying that all I can do is pray.
But why pray when I can come straight to you, Jesus' dad?
-Oh, I'm not -- I'm not. No. [ Laughter ]
-Besides, I love malls, I really do.
The sights, the sounds, the Szechuan samples.
[ Laughter ]
But even here, I can't escape the Democrats.
They're very mean, Santa. They're very mean.
They're very nasty. -Mm.
[ Laughter ] They're very nasty.
They're very nasty people. -Nasty, yes.
-They do nasty things.
They want to impeach me just like Clinton and Nixon
and Prancer and Vixen. [ Laughter ]
But that would be very humiliating,
and the only person who can humiliate me is me.
-Well, that is not true. -Thank you, Santa. Thank you.
Lucky for me, there's one thing I believe in,
and that's the Christmas spirit.
So if this whole thing goes kablooey,
I have a few Christmas wishes I want to make.
Here, I wrote them down.
[ Laughter ] -Oh...
-Now don't worry, I'm not going to ask for dirt on Biden.
I learned my lesson. You can't --
You can't ask a foreign leader for help,
and you, of course, are the president of Alaska.
-Uh, incorrect, incorrect. -So my first wish --
and we all knew this was coming --
we have to do something about Nancy Pelosi.
I mean, she's being a real Omarosa Scrooge.
And -- I'm not asking you to do anything to Nancy,
but you ever heard the song,
"Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer"?
[ Laughter ] -[ Mutters ]
-Just think about it. Just think about it.
Doesn't have to be a reindeer, but...
Could be a golf cart. [ Laughter ]
I'm not micromanaging. -Oh, boy. Okay --
-So that was my first wish. And I get three, right?
Are we playing by Aladdin rules? -No, not exactly.
But you can ask for gifts for your friends.
-Great. Any tips on what to get a Russian dictator
who has everything? [ Laughter ]
I'm pretty sure he's buying me another election,
so I want to get him something good.
-Well -- [ Laughter ]
-Oh, I have this one friend --
let's call him Rudy the Brown-Nosed Reindeer.
[ Laughter ]
He's trying to save himself from going to --
let's call it prison.
-So your Christmas wish is that he ends up okay.
How nice. -No, no,
I'll just get him a Peloton. [ Laughter ]
Oh, look. If I'm being honest, Santa,
this impeachment thing is really scaring me --
like Melania's Christmas decorations.
Or stairs.
[ Laughter ]
I just hope it all works out in the end.
-Well, Donald, if you do get impeached,
it's still up to the Senate to remove you, you know.
-It is? And that will never happen.
Because the Senate is run by my elves, the Republicans.
And that is the greatest gift of all.
Thank you, Santa. My Christmas wish came true.
And oh, yeah, "The Tonight Show" starts right now.
Come on. Let's do this! -Whoo!
♪♪ [ Cheers and applause ]
-From 30 Rockefeller Plaza right here in New York City,
it's "The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon."
♪♪
And now, here he is,
Jimmy Fallon!
[ Cheers and applause ] -♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪
-♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪
-♪ Hey, hey, hey, he-ey ♪
-Give it up! Ah!
The Roots! Nice to see you! Hi!
-♪ Hey ♪
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President Trump Visits Mall Santa to Make an Impeachment Wish

7 Folder Collection
林宜悉 published on July 3, 2020
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