B1 Intermediate US 166 Folder Collection
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- Oh, hello cheese.
- Hey.
Another trip to the fridge, huh?
- I mean, I've only had like six pounds of guac today, so--
Wait.
Who are you?
- It's me, coronavirus.
- Oh, gee.
Okay, wait.
Hi, Corona.
- Just call me Rona.
- You know, I gotta be honest,
kind of forgot about you for a minute.
- Still here, being awful as usual.
- With everything going on,
I went like a week without thinking about you.
- That's crazy.
- So you're still here, and you're ignoring me.
Who are you texting?
- My friends the murder hornets.
We're on a group text.
- Yeah, wait, did I miss the murder hornets?
Did that already happen?
- No, no no no.
You didn't miss it.
And plus, we've got the cicadas
and the hurricanes on this text.
I mean, we're really just trying
to kick it up a notch this year.
- Yeah, and the systemic racism?
Is that you too?
- No, that's all you guys.
Not my fault.
By the way, what is wrong with you people?
- What is wrong with me?
You're the one who's terrible.
- Uh, speaking of terrible, I saw your last Zoom call.
Mute yourself when you're eating chips, lady.
- Whatever.
- Ooh, that's how I getcha.
Always with the face touching.
- Really?
- Who knows?
Are you scared?
- Wait, do you think I have you?
(making noncommittal noise)
- But every time you cough, you're gonna wonder.
- It could be allergies.
- Oh, yeah yeah yeah.
- There's a lot blooming.
- Allergies.
- There's a lot in the air.
It's allergies.
- (laughing) Yeah.
- Whoa whoa whoa, you're getting way too close.
Six feet, please.
- Okay.
- We've been really careful,
and still, you're ruining everything.
- Guilty!
- We have friends who've been sick,
friends who've lost jobs, weddings, graduations, proms.
Everything's canceled.
Are you happy now?
- I mean, kinda.
Does that make me bad?
- Yes, that makes you bad.
- "Yes, that makes you bad."
Listen, I'm just doing my job.
- When will you leave?
We need to get back to our lives.
- Wouldn't you like to know.
- Yes, I would.
That's why I'm asking.
- I'm done when I say I'm done.
I kind of sound like your mom when I say it like that,
don't I?
I mean, I may go away and chill for a minute,
but I'm coming back.
- You know what?
I am done with you.
- Oh, cute mask.
- These work, right?
- I mean, yes, but shh.
- You know what, it's not just this.
- Okay.
- I got hand sanitizer for days.
- You do you.
- Our family is gonna drive to the beach,
we're gonna stay away far from people,
we're just gonna put our toes in the sand.
Who are you texting now?
My guys the great whites.
They're just gonna circle.
You're fine, you're fine.
We're just gonna have them circling.
But you're fine.
- I am done with you.
- Cool.
Sure.
- [Man] So Lola, we've got Rona, systemic racism,
we've got murder hornets, cicadas.
- Oh, zombie fires.
- [Man] What?
- There's zombie fires in Asia or something.
I don't know, actually know where it is.
They're like fires that were underground.
I don't know.
- Hold on a sec, hold on.
Let me look this up.
"Zombie fires are burning in the Arctic
"after surviving the winters."
It's not actual burning zombies.
- [Man] Is that what you thought it was?
- No!
It's like fires where it's cold.
That's why they call it, because it looks like a weird--
- I literally thought, I'm like,
"Oh, people are--
- [Man] Winter is coming.
- Yes, I thought it was like a "Game of Thrones",
the undead are coming back.
Honestly I'd be like, "Huh.
"Probably."
Although also, UFOs.
- And flying snakes.
- What?
- And spiders.
- By the way, UFOs were confirmed a few weeks ago,
and we just missed it.
We just didn't pay attention to that.
- [Man] Lola, thanks for educating us on zombie fires.
- I love you.
- I'm gonna go do nothing.
- Okay.
- [Man] All right.
- Okay.
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If Coronavirus Were A Person

166 Folder Collection
nanako.kamiya published on June 10, 2020
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