(jazzy electronic music)

Although Spain and Italy are still reporting

more than 10,000 new infections each day,

their corona numbers are finally slowing down

which could be a sign that the worst has passed.

And South Korea, they're superstars.

They've reported only 47 new cases yesterday.

And with fewer than 200 deaths

out of a population of 51 million people,

South Korea has basically emerged as maybe the only nation

to have handled the pandemic with near complete success.

And I mean let's be honest,

South Korea was always gonna beat corona

because from what I can tell, everyone in that country

has a basement inside their basement.

So I mean, if you're the virus,

good luck finding a South Korean person.

But maybe the best news of all

is that there are rumors that Netflix

might be dropping a new episode of "Tiger King," people.

That's right.

Jeff Lowe told a fan online that he had been filmed

for a new episode scheduled to drop this week!

Yeah.

And when has Jeff Lowe ever lied?

I mean, if you can't trust a 65 year old man

who dresses like a rebellious teenager,

who can you trust?

And I guess this is how low the bar has gotten

for what counts as good news right now.

We find out there's more episodes about deranged murderers

and people being cruel to animals and we're like, "Yes!

"Oh, some good news.

"Thank you, Lord."

And I'm gonna be honest, guys.

I am terrified of this news.

Because every episode of "Tiger King"

has been crazier than the previous episode,

so what's gonna happen in this new episode?

Are we gonna find out Carole Baskin and her husband

faked his death to get the insurance money

and he's been secretly living inside

one of those tigers all along?

Ah!

So many people in India are quarantined in their homes

that for the first time in a long time

you can actually see the real color of the sky.

And this has happened

in some of the most heavily polluted areas of New Delhi,

where there was just smog every single day.

And one of the images that's been going viral is this one

that came out of New Delhi which shows the before and after

of 1.3 billion people staying at home.

And that's amazing, right?

Just look at how beautiful

New Delhi is without any pollution.

It looks like the entire city went on "Queer Eye."

"You're been hiding yourself under so many layers of smog.

"You've gotta let yourself shine, girl."

I mean, god damn, those are some blue skies.

I bet India probably even forgot

there was a time where skies weren't gray.

It's the same way America forgot there was a time

when presidents weren't orange.

Yeah, they used to be brown.

And it's not just the environment.

With humans locked away,

animals are also starting to flourish.

Here's some good news coming out of Hong Kong.

A zoo, which has been trying unsuccessfully

to get its pandas to mate for 10 years

reported that finally yesterday

the pandas spontaneously started having sex.

And the researchers say they think

it's because nobody is at the zoo.

And I'm like, yeah, I don't need to be a researcher

to know that's what's happening.

Of course the pandas are having sex now that nobody's there.

How do you think you would react if every day

hundreds of people came to your bedroom window

like, "Come on!

"Have sex!

"Do it!

"Come on, have sex!

"Do it, do, put it in!"

So I don't blame the pandas.

I mean, like, even when I have one person

watching me during sex, I'm like,

"Hey, can you look the other way?

"I'm just getting, yeah, I'm just real self-conscious.

"Would you mind looking, look the other way.

"It's a lot of pressure."

This just makes you realize

that when we're telling our grandkids

about coronavirus years from now,

the animals are gonna be telling

a completely different story.

"Grandma, tell us about the coronavirus."

"Oh, little ones, it was a wonderful time.

"There were no humans and your grandpa was smashing me

"like there was no tomorrow."

So good news for those pandas.

Although the bad news is now that nobody's watching,

the monkeys have all stopped having sex.

Now those guys are freaky.

Now, please don't get me wrong,

corona's also bringing out some of the best in humanity.

- Lifting spirits during this tough time

is a real superhero.

Batman is hitting the streets of San Diego.

- [Reporter] By day, Chris Banner runs a lawn service,

helping cut weeds and fire lines on people's property.

But when duty calls,

(Batsignal hails)

he suits up.

He's go the Batsuit and he's got the wheels,

a replica 1989 Batmobile that he and a friend built.

Normally, Chris gets paid to make appearances

at birthday parties and other special occasions.

But while the pandemic goes on,

he decided to just hit the road and make people smile.

- Aw.

That is such a sweet idea, man.

That guy's a hero.

I just hope he never started talking like Batman,

'cause would've freaked people out.

"Yay, it's Batman!"

"That's right, kids, it's me."

"Whoa, is that coronavirus?

"Get away, dude, get away!"

"No, this is just how I."

"Well, this is not the time.

"Just use your normal voice, man.

"What's wrong with you?"

"Yeah, you're right, I should."

"Okay, go back to the other voice.

"That one is not cool."

Jack Dorsey, the founder of Twitter

and world's richest barista,

has announced that he will be donating $1 billion

to help fight the coronavirus.

That's 28% of his wealth.

Yeah.

And that's amazing.

Using your money to fight coronavirus.

And what better person to fight a thing

that's poisoning society

than the inventor of a thing that's poisoning society.

No, I'm just being a hater, man.

This is incredible.

Like, for real.

It's incredible because it's generous,

it's a powerful gesture at a moment like this,

and it's also throwing shade,

so much shade at Mark Zuckerberg and Jeff Bezos.

Because they also donated money,

but they donated way, way less than Dorsey

and they've got way, way more money than Dorsey.

He donated, like, 30% of his net worth

and they donated less than 1/2 a percent of their net worth.

It's like if the check at a restaurant came

and everyone else tips five bucks

and then you buy the waiter a Lamborghini.

That's basically what Dorsey did right here.

"Yeah, yeah, thanks, the service was great.

"Oh, my friends?

"Yeah, they're just cheap bitches.

"You know how it is."

Now look, not everyone has a billion dollars

which is why people around the world have found

all sorts of ways to try

and stop the spread of this disease.

For instance, you know how we're all stressed

about making sure that we keep six feet

between ourselves and other people when we're out in public?