Now,

I’m always hunting for the perfect puppet

and I need another volunteer

and I wonder if I could ahh…

if I could bury you at the end.

What’s your name?

It’s Luke.

Luke? Luke, yes!

What do you do, Luke?

I’m a student.

You’re a student, I can see.

Can we give it up for Luke!

Please come on up!

Thank you!

Now, could you stand on that side of me.

So Luke,

I’m just gonna give you a slight makeover with this mask.

Take your glasses off. Thank you.

And oh, can you see?

Yeah!

Now this is just a simple mask.

This gonna take the heat off you.

Gosh!

Are you comfortable?

Oh yes, I’m loving it!

Hahahahahaha.

Haha. This is classic.

Okay!

Oh, I wasn’t expecting this!

So ahm, Luke

Yes yes.

Are you happy to be here? Are you okay?

Yes, I’m delighted because the things are going on so far.

Okay good.

Yes. In fact, I’m really glad you called me up here.

Why is that, Luke?

‘Coz I’d like to share you all my dance moves.

Are you sure?

Yes!

All my life I’ve been waiting for an opportunity like this.

I think the world is ready to see my dancing.

Are you sure? Are you sure you wanna dance?

Yes, I’m absolutely sure!

‘Coz you could sit down anytime you want.

I’m not sitting down!

Not ‘til I’m done with my dancing.

Okay.

With your body...

your body like this suggests that you might not want to dance?

Now I really can’t wait.

I’m fantastically excited.

I’ll just put my hands in my pockets to conserve energy.

For when I lose, it’ll stop the contracting energy.

Are you sure…

because you have free speech, you exercise your right to free speech.

No, absolutely no need for that.

I’m very happy to dance.

Okay, well one of you… I’m so sorry.

Don’t be sorry. I’m loving it!

Well,

ahm,

they want you to

I mean they want you to make.

If you don’t feel lie it , you don’t have to.

No thanks. In music my help.

Okay, we can give you music

Hit the music!

Is that good?

Yes, that’s excellent!

It’s not too weird?

No! Gypsy class is my favorite drum roll.

Okay, well, so he’s so sure.

Yes, it’s my favorite song.

Okay, when are you ready?

I’m just waiting for the chorus.

I’m not sure there is one.

Oh, okay.

Is this it?

Alright!

Oh not this. It’s the next beat.

Listen you can sit down.

No! I’m not sitting down!!!

I feel cruel.

No I love what you mean and carry on as long as you like.

Alright, fine.

Yeah. So now, I’m gonna show you my left hand and raising.

Your left hand, yes that would do!

That’s the start! There you go!

It’s good! I like it!

You wanna to see the other hand?

Yeah, they have to see the other hand.

Yeah, here’s my other hand.

That’s lovely!

Thank you! Thank you very much!

So that’s your dancing?

Yes.

It’s there!

Oh yeah!

I love it!

Can’t get out!

Check it out! Check it out!

I love it!

Brilliant!

Thank you! I’m enjoying myself now!

Alright, that was wonderful!

I feel liberated.

Oh, the end of joy came after me in the end.

Thank you so much!

Let’s give it up for Luke!

Amazing!

Uh, thank you.

Thank you very much for having me.

I’ve been Nina Conti. Goodbye!

Ladies and gentlemen, Nina Conti!