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  • Hey mom, I think I'm sick.

  • Can you please come over, and bring the Campbell's Chicken Noodle Soup?

  • For your son?

  • I'm sick.

  • How did I get sick?

  • I take a multi-vitamin every day, I get enough sleep every night, I wash my hands religiously.

  • Where did I go wrong?

  • Is there no justice in this world?

  • According to WebMD, I either have a cold, or death will be upon me at any moment.

  • No, stop!

  • You can't take care of me!

  • I'm supposed to be taking care of you.

  • I don't need to go to a doctor for a cold, all right?

  • I've got my old fashioned remedy right here.

  • Just like my Aunt Hilda used to give me when I was a toddler.

  • No, I have got to go to work today.

  • They are gonna fall apart at the office if I don't show up!

  • Now, question for you, how much of this is too much?

  • Because I think I'm starting to reach that point!

  • I'm not skipping my workout just 'cause of a little cold.

  • No days off, bro.

  • I go hard.

  • Okay, all right, I'm taking the day off.

  • I'm not gonna be coming in today, I really don't feel well.

  • I've got a headache, fever, chills, and I threw up right before I made this phone call, but that was just because I was nervous about calling in sick.

  • Yeah, I'm sick.

  • Sick of all you suckas at the office.

  • Ha ha, gotcha!

  • Actually no, I have diarrhea, so I'm not coming in today.

  • A sick day is a perfect opportunity to catch up on some reading.

  • Or to just watch YouTube for eight hours.

  • Specifically the Frank James channel.

  • Dora!

  • Dora, you idiot!

  • Swiper's right next to you!

  • He's literally right there!

  • Oh my gosh.

  • You suck at exploring.

  • It hurts to much to move my body.

  • But I gotta get up and get that video game controller, or this will have been a wasted sick day.

  • Time to regain my strength the only way I know how... arguing with fools online.

  • Look at you, you're a mess!

  • You're gonna let a little cold stop you?

  • Pull it together, man!

  • When you've got a cold

  • And you're feelin' low

  • Just remember when

  • Your sinuses were clear

  • And then make yourself

  • Some chicken soup

  • All I have done today is rest and take my medication at the appropriate times.

  • So why can't I stop pooping?

  • Mom!

  • Mom!

  • It's me!

  • I have a headache, chills, other stuff.

Hey mom, I think I'm sick.

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