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  • You should just pick something.

  • I can't decide. There's so many options.

  • It's like, who even watches all this stuff?

  • How about "Flip My Aquarium"?

  • - Oh, God, never mind. - Yeah, that sounds terrible.

  • How about this? "Britain's Smallest Pies."

  • That sounds... fine?

  • Sure. Try it out.

  • [bleep]! We've got a live one, people!

  • What is it this time, boss?

  • Someone clicked on the tiny [bleep] pie show.

  • Why would someone click on that?

  • I don't know why, but they did.

  • And it's not real, so we need to make up something quick. Go on!

  • I'm sorry, what are we doing?

  • Your first day?

  • Buckle up, kid.

  • The majority of shows and movies on Netflix are fake.

  • Just catchy titles with nice-looking graphic boxes, so it looks like we have all the shows in the world.

  • Yeah, they're padding for real shows like "Stranger Things" and "Frasier."

  • So whenever somebody clicks on one of these fake bullshit titles like "Britain's Smallest Pies" or "Battery Hoarders" or "Santa Clarita Diet," we have to slap something together real quick.

  • All right, come on, people! We can't buffer forever, let's go!

  • - Lena. - What?

  • - Get the pie! - Pie?

  • - Get the pie! - Where, where?

  • - From the pie closet! - What?

  • - Smallest pie you find! - Okay, I'll find it!

  • Boss? We've got a pie.

  • Great! Now put it down!

  • We're ready for your voiceover.

  • Perfect.

  • - I'm sorry, are you British? - Huh?

  • Are you a pie?

  • Then get out of the shot! Get out of the shot.

  • All right. Everybody quiet down.

  • Everybody quiet down.

  • We're going live in three, two, one, "Pies come in all shapes and sizes."

  • "But in this show, they're all small."

  • "Join us as we take a look at some of Britain's smallest pies."

  • This is it? This is boring as shit.

  • Yeah, I thought it was going to be like a competition or something?

  • No competition here. It's just... this.

  • Oh, thank God! They turned it off.

  • Great work, everyone. Great work!

  • Uh, boss. You're going to want to see this.

  • Now what?

  • The same couple. Now they're hovering over a title called "Big Pointy Houses."

  • Looks like they're deciding between that and "The Shrimp Whisperer."

  • The [bleep] is wrong with these people?

  • Why can't they watch "Stranger Things" or "Frasier" like normal people?

  • Okay.

  • We have to prepare for both contingencies.

  • Martinez, find me stock footage of the biggest, pointiest houses you can. Go!

  • Jackson, call that guy you know, the one with the shrimp boat.

  • Go, go, go, go!

  • What if we don't have enough time for that?

  • We'll just play something else. Pretend it's a glitch.

  • A real show. I don't know, like "Frasier."

  • Crisis averted, sir. They picked "Black Mirror."

  • Oh, thank God. That was close.

  • - Oh, no. - What?

  • Some guy in Minnesota just pressed play on "Santa Clarita Diet"!

  • Okay. Get me Drew Barrymore!

  • Why is she so mad?

  • She's been down here for two seasons.

  • You know what? Let's just play "Frasier."

You should just pick something.

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