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  • The Addams family

  • (GULPING)

  • Now, now, Cleopatra, chew your burgers.

  • Don't gulp them.

  • (CHOKING)

  • Darling, now you see what happens when you gulp?

  • Quite enough lunch.

  • Well, what do they look like?

  • Oh, just ordinary moving men. One's tall, one's medium.

  • No, darling. I mean, the new neighbors.

  • Oh, I haven't seen them yet.

  • They have some interesting things, though.

  • Really?

  • GOMEZ: There's an item you could do things with.

  • Oh, I do hope they're imaginative.

  • The real estate man said they were newlyweds.

  • At least they're romantic.

  • Really? How nice.

  • I know just how they feel.

  • The joy of moving into a new house.

  • I'll never forget my first night in this lovely house.

  • We thought it was haunted.

  • Well, you can't have everything.

  • I only hope they'll be half as happy.

  • How could they be anything else?

  • With us right next door.

  • Horrible house next door.

  • You suppose anybody lives in it?

  • Honey, I didn't even know that house was there.

  • As I remember, the renting agent

  • had the shutters closed on this side.

  • Married by a Justice of the Peace, and, and no honeymoon

  • and now I spend my wedding night in this house.

  • Well, it could have been worse.

  • You might have had to spend it in that house.

  • (EXPLOSION)

  • What was that?

  • I-I-I-It was an explosion from--from that monstrosity.

  • I-I-I-I'll go over there and see what's happening.

  • I-I-I-I'll go with you.

  • In sickness and in health, for better, for worse,

  • we're stuck in this thing together.

  • There we are now, down you go.

  • Mmm-hmm. Huh?

  • There we are. You see them yet?

  • No.

  • Maybe they'll see us and come over.

  • I still think we should just have gone over and introduced ourselves.

  • Oh, darling, no. That's much too forward.

  • This is better.

  • Here they come.

  • Mmm.

  • Oh, how do you do?

  • I'm Gomez Addams.

  • This is my wife, Morticia.

  • How do you do?

  • Hubert Peterson. This is my wife, Amanda.

  • We, we were just married.

  • Oh, how exciting!

  • You do that again...

  • Never mind the small talk. Find out what blew up.

  • Oh, yes.

  • Uh, we were just wondering about those little explosions.

  • What explosions?

  • (EXPLOSION)

  • Those explosions.

  • Oh, that must be Uncle Fester playing with his new dynamite caps.

  • What?

  • He got them at the discount house.

  • They are not up to par.

  • You mean there's somebody exploding dynamite inside your house?

  • Where else would he do it?

  • Well, I see you're washing your pup.

  • Oh, good heavens. That isn't a pup.

  • It's an octopus.

  • You have an octopus for a pet?

  • Oh, no.

  • It's our son's pet.

  • Go ahead, shake his tentacle.

  • Take it away.

  • Darling, dry it first.

  • Oh, I'm sorry. Excuse me.

  • There we are.

  • He's really very friendly.

  • (WATER BUBBLING)

  • Let's get out of here.

  • Yes, well, nice meeting you both.

  • Nice meeting you.

  • Seems like a nice chap.

  • She's a bit odd.

  • Little high-strung.

  • It's their wedding day, a new house.

  • And, Aristotle, you were very, very bashful.

  • (BUBBLING)

  • Time to dry.

  • I had so hoped she'd be someone

  • I could exchange recipes with.

  • Hubert, you never should have rented this house without letting me see it.

  • Honey, remember the fantastic deal we got.

  • Well, I guess I'll just have to pretend they're not there.

  • That's my dear, brave girl.

  • (KNOCKING ON FLOOR)

  • (KNOCKING ON FLOOR)

  • What was that?

  • What was what?

  • You know what.

  • Those sounds under the house.

  • Uh, termites?

  • I knew it. The house is crumbling.

  • It came from over there.

  • (GASPING)

  • Howdy.

  • I'm Uncle Fester, from next door.

  • Gosh, Hubert, he's that dynamite nut.

  • He'll blow us up.

  • I just came over to say hello.

  • Nail that shut.

  • Goodbye, Hubert. I'll call you.

  • Where are you going?

  • Out.

  • Oh, but, honey, this is our wedding day.

  • Enjoy it.

  • But, honey...

  • Oh, Mr. Wentworth, thank goodness you're here.

  • And here's your lease, all signed and sealed.

  • For a year, this happy honeymoon cottage is all yours.

  • Hubert, either get me another house or get yourself another wife.

  • Now, come down, honey, calm down.

  • Perhaps Mr. Wentworth will cancel the lease?

  • Oh, I'm only the rental agent.

  • Well, where do I find the owner?

  • Right next door. His name is Addams.

  • What'd they hit you with, Fester?

  • I don't know.

  • I just opened up the trap door and said, "Howdy," and wham!

  • Don't sound very friendly to me.

  • You must have frightened them going through Pugsley's tunnel.

  • Next time, Uncle Fester, knock.

  • I did.

  • Really?

  • Gomez, we have ourselves some very peculiar neighbors.

  • Peculiar? They're a couple of nuts.

  • There's only one thing to do.

  • Get rid of them.

  • I can't. I signed the lease this morning.

  • I'll get rid of them.

  • I'll go with you, Fester.

  • Right, Mama.

  • I haven't used this beauty since the taxman was here.

  • Fester, Mama, control yourselves.

  • Yes, think of what you're doing.

  • You know, they're right.

  • We better not go over there in broad daylight.

  • They're liable to ambush us.

  • We'll wait till it's dark.

  • You will do no such thing. They're our neighbors.

  • (FOGHORN SOUNDING)

  • Excuse me, my dearest.

  • Probably them, coming over to apologize.

  • We'd better go out in the backyard and practice, anyway.

  • Just in case.

  • Ah, Mr. Wentworth, how nice to see you again.

  • And it's always such a...

  • (STUTTERING) Such a thrill to see you, Mrs. Addams.

  • My! That's a new dress you're wearing.

  • How kind of you to notice.

  • Glad you dropped in, Wentworth.

  • Those new tenants, have they signed the lease yet?

  • They want to break it.

  • Leave that lovely cottage?

  • With its view of this fine old mansion?

  • Well, they're young, rattlebrained.

  • They did seem a bit nervous.

  • But it's their wedding day.

  • I shook, too, remember?

  • Yes.

  • Anyway, the lease is signed,

  • and they'll just have to learn to live with you.

  • Uh, it.