Subtitles section Play video Print subtitles Hum, medium rare with a golden crust. Yeah, right, burnt to the core. Now that's a s'more. [MUSIC PLAYING] That's cute, guys, first s'more? I found dinner. Bruce is doing chili tonight. Bruce is weak. I'm having lizard. We'll be eating in no less than a week. It's a little soft-shell turtle. Oh, in Indonesia, they cook these things right, and these little shells turn into potato chips. I got him. Oh, ha, ha, ha, I got him What do you guys want to do? I don't know. We could go hiking. [LAUGHTER] Are you serious? I'm from the campsite next door. Did he just suggest going hiking? Yeah. [LAUGHTER] What are you going to do at the end, just turn around and walk back? [LAUGHTER] Not today, skeeters. I ain't taking any chances. [MUSIC PLAYING] [SPITTING] [COUGHING] That was perfect. I want to make fun of you, but this is brilliant. Unbelievable job. You guys want to go call in an animal? Yep, yep, giddy-giddy. [ELK CALL] [TURKEY CALL] [DUCK CALL] This will bring pretty much anything in with antlers. What's wrong with this spot? Dude, you can never put your campsite in front of the east-facing treeline. You'll have no breeze. Dude, water-- put your bags down. No, pick your bags up. What about high tide? Unless you got an arc in that suitcase, we ain't staying. That's either a painted bunting or a golden-cheeked warbler. Silly me. That's a tufted tit mouse. Dad gum, I found the devil's walking stick. Beagle weed. That's a pretty weepy willow. Rest in peace. Well, I'll be, a Montezuma bald cypress. We meet again. Man, it sure would be cool if we had some music or something. I was really hoping for some peace and quiet. Oh, you know what? I brought my guitar. Let me, guys, play you. I just learned a new song. [SINGING] Take me out to the ball game. Root, root, root, root for the home team. Are you guys a big fan of original music? I wrote this one. [SINGING] Sometimes I feel like the rain is washing away my soul. Oh, oh. Hey, man, you mind if I play? Hey. yeah, share the love, you know? Oh, thanks, dude, pretty awesome Oh. Oh my. Are you serious? [MUSIC PLAYING] [CRICKETS CHIRPING] What's that? I think there's bees on my tent. That could have been a Sasquatch. Hey, sweetheart, is that you taking a poop? It's definitely a mammal. [SCREAMING] Now this is camping. If you have to use your restroom, use the powder bath. Master's for me. Best part of the day. I have been camping wrong my whole life. This is unbelievable. Woo, socks and sandals is not the ideal shoe combo for this terrain. Mind if I put my twitch-- I guess I'm going to camp right here. It's like a never-ending spaghetti noodle. Hey, Jack Pot, by my crocks. We just got a fresh basil plant right near our camp site. Oh, huh, guys I've done it. I've built a tent. I've tented. That's an itchier than normal basil. By the end of this, you guys are going to call me Camper Ty. Whoa! Wow! Whoa! I'm dying. Oh, it feels great in here. Am I the only one that brought a portable air conditioner? Good thing I brought my fancy filter straw. Oh, that's crisp. [MUSIC PLAYING] Where's Cody? Hm? Where's Cody? He went to sleep inside in the air conditioning. Mister, let's sleep outside in the tents? That'll be fun. Went to sleep inside on the couch? Are you kidding me right now? You selfish camper. No I was trying to make room for you guys in the tent. Liar! Give me one good reason I should not rage right now. Oh, I'll go grab donuts, donuts. You love those. I'm on Keto. [YELLING] No! [SHOUTING] No! [INAUDIBLE] No artificial light! No! You know what we should do? What? Open up some windows for some AC. Fire wood coming in hot. Never can have too big of a fire. [YELLING] No! [SHOUTING] There we go. Oh! Oh wow, these interior windows are a lot stronger than I remember. No! My dog's in there. He's probably freaking out, pooping on himself again. How selfish of me. I forgot the food. I forgot the chili I made for you last night that you didn't even take a bite of. I think this room could use a little color! This is my version of the Sistine Chapel. This is what I like to call my Jackson Pollock masterpiece. No! Come on! Are you kidding me? Yeah! Oh! I am never going camping with you again. That smells terrible! All right, everyone grab something. Let's go set up camp. [PHONE RINGING] Grab that end over there. Yeah, now's a great time. Dude, there's a frog over here. Oh, why are we doing this? Is there really no place to plug in my Xbox? It's way too hot. I have to cook the bacon? Oh. Aw. How am I supposed to cook a hot dog without a microwave? No way I'm going to get any sleep. Can't believe I actually had to pay you to come do this. Fellas, this is going to carve up nicely. Not going to