This first one is from @RoeyCustard.

-Mmm! -She says...

I dropped my brand-new phone in water. My dad said to "just put it in the microwave for a few seconds."

I had to buy a new phone, he had to buy a new microwave.

That's not good.

This one is from @MrPibb4life. He says...

I once drank a beer bong full of Jägermeister while sitting in a hot tub because my buddy said, "You can't get drunk at sea level."

Well, that's -- That's not -- That's...

That is not -- That's bad advice.

That's false.

You know it's not true.

Yeah, the Navy should know that.

It's true.

This one's from @kinkyturtle.

She says, "The guy at the hardware store told my friend that turpentine would remove paint from her hair. It did. It also removed her hair."

What are you cryin' about?

-The paint's gone. -Technically, it worked.

This one's from @d nnykingsl y. -Ooh!

-Rather. -Rather.

Where's he from?

Good day to you, sir.

-Danny Kingsley. -Danny Kingsley.

I don't know if that's how he talks.

But Danny Kingsley.

He says, "My dad told me to always fry bacon shirtless so you never get grease strains."

Third-degree burns all over his stomach.

-Are those freckles? -No, they're not freckles.

They're scars.

They're grease scars. That's bad.

Turpentine will get those out, man.

Thanks for the advice.

You know my doctor -- Dr. Pepper.

-Yeah. Dr. Pepper. -Yeah.

This one's from @canadianlinz. She said, "I was going for a job interview, and my brother told me to maintain constant eye contact with the interviewer and never blink."

Tell me about Casual Friday.

I'm really excited to work here. I'm a people person.

This one's from @To neo71. He says, "When my wife said, "Don't get me anything for my birthday," my friend told me not to get her anything to prove that I'm a "good listener.""

No. That's bad advice. That is bad advice, dude.

Oh, my goodness. -No.

This one's from ScrangelaSaurus.

She says, "My friend once told me, "You should smoke weed before a job interview, so if you show up to work stoned they won't know the difference."

Where do I see myself in five years?

Taco Bell.

This last one's from @liz nawrocki.

She says, "My doctor told me to "go to see a real doctor."

Oh, wow. That's bad advice.

There you have it.

Those are "Tonight Show Hashtags."

To check out more of our favorites, go to tonightshow.com/hashtags.