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  • We all have that one friend that's perfect no matter what.

  • No, that's me.

  • I'm talking about my friend, Jessica.

  • Tall skinny blonde who can eat whatever the hell she wants and not gain a single pound...

  • ...while I sit there and choke on a salad.

  • So you're ready for a good day tomorrow, right?

  • - No? - What do you gonna wear?

  • Probably a garbage bag because I put on so much weight?

  • Shut up?

  • So...

  • You're beautiful.

  • You see me, right?

  • I see me on a dating app and like with facetime a few times but I don't know, it's different when you see someone in person, you know.

  • You're good.

  • He's a Calvin Klein model, Jessica, okay?

  • He is a six-pack and all those ex's are Victoria's Secret Models.

  • Girl, you are Victoria's Secret Model!

  • You got this, okay?

  • Stop lying to me.

  • Aha...

  • I should just got that surgery.

  • We're here to make your plastic surgery dreams come true.

  • Um...

  • You know, just something really simple.

  • Take in my waist.

  • I mean, I just wanna look like her.

  • Oh... I'm sorry, what?

  • You wanna look like me?

  • Yeah.

  • Hahahaahah.

  • You should stay fat, fat people are funny.

  • After surgery your body would be bangin'!

  • No, but your body's not even that bad now!

  • Cigarettes are not that bad.

  • Trump for president is not that bad.

  • Saying my body's not that bad means... I'm fat.

  • Hey!

  • You're hot!

  • Oh...

  • Thanks!

  • No, not you, you stupid bitch, the blonde right next to you!

  • He's talking about you.

  • Let's just go to the gym, all right?

  • We already tried that, remember?

  • Ah!

  • You didn't told me that's hot!

  • Let's just start walking.

  • So just go home, put the face mask on I got you, drink some red wine...

  • Get some sleep, you can do a double date if you want...?

  • I'll let you know.

  • - Okay. - Okay. - Sounds good. - Thanks.

  • Bye.

  • Oh, no. Undo, undo, undo, undo, undooo...

  • Why can't my waist just be a little bit smaller?!

  • This can't be right.

  • There's something wrong with this mirror.

  • Oooooh my God...

  • No.

  • Oh my God, your waist is so small!

  • I know it's, um, I've been using the way shaper...

  • ...for like five days?

  • Wait...

  • Why is that eye bigger than the other?

  • Um, this one?

  • Um, I... I got stung. I got stung by a bee guys yesterday.

  • - Oh, okay! - A bee, yeah?

  • That makes sense, yeah?

  • All right, bye guys!

  • Have fun.

  • Too far.

  • The hell did I do to myself?

  • So should we just go back to how it was?

  • Sometimes we have to remind ourselves that it's ok not to be perfect.

  • How do you measure perfection, anyway.

  • Is it based on our weight or our height, the size of our lips for how small our waist can be.

  • I think perfection is a myth...

  • And we shouldn't have to measure up to a media features.

  • Because we're all perfect in our own way.

  • - What's up? - Hi!

  • Look at you.

  • You're looking better real life.

  • Aww... Thank you.

  • But you had brown eyes, right?

  • (Ah, I guess I left one little thing.) Oh! Um...

  • There are contacts.

  • Oooh...

  • - You're ready? - Yeah!

  • Let's go.

We all have that one friend that's perfect no matter what.

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