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I would never go to an Indian guy that became a doctor.
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Especially one that was born and raised in this part of the world, f*ck that.
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Cause if we were born and raised here you had real dreams, and it was never to become a doctor.
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Let's be honest. I would go to an Indian woman.
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Cause when an Indian woman becomes a doctor, that means she really wanted to be a doctor.
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Cause even her parents like, "Sweetie. You don't have to become a doctor,
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You can just marry a doctor."
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She's like, "F*ck you. I wanna be a doctor." I need that kind of determination from my doctor.
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You know, well you had dreams in your 14 years old, right, Sandeep? But it wasn't to be a doctor.
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That's not what a fourteen-year-old dreams about it. 14 year old has dreams that are
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ridiculous, that your dream at 14 should never be
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logical. It should just be the dumbest shit you're doing at 14. I'll tell you what my dream was when I was 14.
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It wasn't to be a comedian. I didn't even know this job existed.
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My dream, it'll make you feel better about whatever your dream was.
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My dream at fourteen here's I thought I was going to do with the rest of my life. I thought I
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wanted to be a dancer.
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Alright, first of all, f*ck you, all right.
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Second of all, I'm not a stripper. I would I was a breakdancer like, yo I'm going to do this sh*t forever.
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Not a realistic goal, though.
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What was your dream when you're a fourteen-year-old boy growing up on the mean streets of Mississauga?
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Sandeep, now be honest, don't make no bullsh*t up.
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huh?
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A musician. Did you play an instruments?
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Oh well good. That's a good start. I always. I don't have Indian guys
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You know yell out shit that they never did? I wanted to be in the NBA
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Did you play basketball ?
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not once,
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just love Giant Black men
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Y'know just-
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What instrument did you play?
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Guitar, you good?
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You still throw down on it?
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Yeah, so you wanted to be a musician-I know what happened tell me if I'm right.
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You're about 17-18 years old you're sitting in your room playing with your
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"guitar."
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And your mom walked in, and you were thinking I'm going to be a musician, your mom walked in, and then "Sandoo"
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Cause that's all you need to do for an Indian nickname.
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All you need to add 2 o's to whatever you want the nickname to be.
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"Sandoo" like look what Edward and Edwoo. Well that could be your name, Ed Wu. Sorry, that, um, that didn't work cause,
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He might very well be an Ed Wu, yeah.
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Your mom walked in, "Sandoo."
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You're going to college, why don't you become a doctor?
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You're like what's wrong with your face?
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If you become a doctor you can fix it!
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So you put your guitar down and picked up,
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stethoscope and it was all over, after that, that's why I could never go to you.
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I don't want my doctor to have had other dreams about being something else. My doctor in America is
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going to be a black guy,
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from the hood, who grew up with every disadvantage, real hood, like in the hood hood like where the-where people, were like you could
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Yo cuz! Let's go kill some motherf*ckers today!
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I want my doctor to be the guy that said "No Man!"
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I'm gonna be a doctor!
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And everybody in the hood was like "Ain't nobody gonna f*ck with the Pharaoh."
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He's gonna be a doctor and sh*t.
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That time I know I got the right doctor cause he'll say "and sh*t" at the end of sentences.
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He'll look pissed off when I walk into the doctors office. That's the doctor I want. Alright Mr. Peters,
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Seems your nasal passage's inflamed and sh*t.
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You fill out this little bi*ch-a** prescription
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Holla at me tomorrow, Motherf*cker
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That's the right doctor for me-I don't want my doctor to be some bratty Indian kid who grew up in Mississauga
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Halfway through an operation. Just goes f*ck this sh*t.
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I wanna play guitar and then goes (funny noises).