Name: 【TED】Emily Nagoski: The truth about unwanted arousal (The truth about unwanted arousal | Emily Nagoski)
Uploaded: 2018-06-04T15:03:37.000Z
Duration: 15 min 17 s
Description: Thousands of YouTube videos with English-Chinese subtitles! Now you can learn to understand native speakers, expand your vocabulary, and improve your pronunciation...

Basic passive voice

[This talk contains mature content Viewer discretion is advised]

My specialty, as a sex educator, is I bring the science.

But my first and most important job is that I stay neutral

no embarrassment, no titillation, no judgment, no shame,

At the end of a conference in a hotel lobby once,

I'm literally on my way out the door and a colleague chases me down.

"Emily, I just have a really quick question.

wants to know if it's possible to get addicted to her vibrator."

The answer is no, but it is possible to get spoiled.

A different conference, this one in an outdoor tropical paradise,

I'm at the breakfast buffet, and a couple approaches me.

but we just wanted to ask a quick question about premature ejaculation."

"Sure, let me tell you about the stop/start technique."

I stay neutral when other people might "squick."

Squick is an emotion that combines surprise

and like, not knowing what to do with your hands.

is because you spent the first two decades of your life

learning that sex is a dangerous and disgusting source of everlasting shame

and if you're not really good at it, no one will ever love you.

So you might squick, hearing me talk about sex

while you're sitting in a room full of strangers -- that is normal.

We make our way through the darkness to get to the light at the end.

Because I want to share with you today a piece of science

that has changed how I think about everything,

from the behavior of neurotransmitters in our emotional brain,

to the dynamics of our interpersonal relationships.

There's an area of your brain you've probably heard referred to

is a little bit like calling your face your nose.

but it ignores some other parts and will leave you really confused

if you're trying to understand how faces work.

It's actually three intertwined but separable systems.

so this is the opioid hotspots in your emotional brain.

If you drop sugar water on the tongue of a newborn infant,

the opioid-liking system sets off fireworks.

Wanting is mediated by this vast dopaminergic network

It motivates us to move toward or away from a stimulus.

Wanting is more like your toddler, following you around,

He makes dogs salivate in response to a bell.

It's easy, you give a dog food, salivates automatically,

Does that salivation mean that the dog wants to eat the bell?

Does it mean that the dog finds the bell delicious?

What Pavlov did was make the bell food-related.

When we see this separateness of wanting, liking and learning,

this is where we find an explanatory framework

for understanding what researchers call arousal nonconcordance.

is when there is a lack of predictive relationship

between your physiological response, like salivation,

and your subjective experience of pleasure and desire.

That happens in every emotional and motivational system that we have,

has found that genital blood flow can increase

even if those sex-related stimuli are not also associated

with the subjective experience of wanting and liking.

between genital response and subjective experience

Subtitles ListPlay Video

【TED】Emily Nagoski: The truth about unwanted arousal (The truth about unwanted arousal | Emily Nagoski)

articulate

recognize

matter

experience