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  • Hello everybody! My name is Markiplier and welcome to-

  • *does octodad impression*

  • Hello everybody! My name is Markiplier and welcome to "Dead End Road".

  • Now I found this horror game and it looked very interesting because it was kind of a...

  • pseudo-pixelated style?

  • I have no idea how it's gonna play, I have no idea how it's gonna--

  • Hello Grandma, how are you doing?

  • Hohoho, whoa!

  • "So you've finally arrived my dear?"

  • Oh have I? "You can come closer if you would like?" I would not like that; I'd like to maintain as much distance

  • between me and that fucked up face as I possibly can.

  • Holy shit! "Perhaps my appearance frightens you?"

  • You're goddamn right it does! What happened to your eyes?!

  • Ugh! "There is no need to be afraid child."

  • "You seek instruction on the ritual, yes?"

  • Ok! You know you said there's no need to be afraid *lisps a bit* then you say thing like there's going to be rituals?

  • And I need instruction for them. I'm not okay with this - this is absolutely absurd.

  • "That is what my visitors usually ask of me." *Awkward giggle*

  • OOOOkay! "It is true that the ritual has power..."

  • "...the power to grant one wish."

  • "But it comes at a terrible cost"

  • Ok! What? "I can see you will not be dissuaded-"

  • Can you? I'm easily dissuaded; you could just tell me to leave and I'll go.

  • "Go perform the ritual, then return to me."

  • "And bring with you the following; A book, a bell and a candle."

  • Ok? Alright! A book, a bell and a candle.

  • "Can you remember that, my dear?" Yeah! A book, a bell and a candle.

  • I don't know why I need these things but I'll go get them for you Grandma!

  • "So then, do you still wish to proceed?"

  • "Very well"

  • "Then we shall begin..."

  • With a book, a bell and a candle.

  • Oh geez! OH geez! OH GEEZ!

  • "Perform the ritual with the directional input"

  • I don't know what I'm doing?!?

  • What do I?

  • Ooohh!

  • Ah!

  • Whoa!

  • Did I do it? Do I get my wish now?

  • Whoa!

  • Okay!

  • Ah!

  • This is bizarre...

  • Okay?

  • Oh, okay! I get it: it glows where it supposed to be,

  • and each of the button[s] controls a

  • different...

  • Ok! that's supposed to be there, those two are supposed to be there...

  • ...and this is supposed to be here!

  • AHH! There we go!

  • Okay! Got it, got it, got it! Book, a bell and a candle. Did I get those? Or did I need to get those?

  • "What is your request of the dark powers?"

  • Um!

  • *conflicted groan* How do I subtly wish for a bigger dick?

  • *Bubble noise*

  • Uh!

  • A huge, massive, enor- Uh oh!

  • Uh! Ok! Uh! Just erase it...

  • Um...

  • Ultimate power...

  • *More conflicted groaning*

  • A doggo...

  • A-a a

  • *Mark.exe is not responding*

  • A doggo named Fred- Ah fuck it.

  • Ultimate power!

  • Bam, bitch! Give it to me! What's the terrible cost?

  • Oh hey- Whooaa, hey...

  • Hello! Ah, fuck off with you! I should've had my defense up!

  • *Sick robot wobs?*

  • What?

  • Oh oh. What did I do? Do I have ultimate power? I don't know. I don't know what I did. I don't know what I did, bruh!

  • Okay. Alrighty, then. I'm driving in a car now.

  • Oh, geez.

  • I love the styling of this game, by the way. I know it's like, it's low-res, but

  • it's intentionally low res- oh, geez. OH, g- OH, geez! OH-h-ho geez!

  • Oh, geez! Aw, cool

  • OHH, geez! I'm outta here, baby! I don't know where I'm going, but- whoo, hey!

  • Oh, this wind that rushes through these hills...

  • Oh, boy... OH boy, oh boy. Hello!

  • ok goodbye Ah! Gonna crash! Oh, geez! I don't know what I'm supposed to be doing with this!

  • Where am I going? I'm so confused.

  • And panicked! Hoping that grandma doesn't show up at any moment. She never even- Oh geez, what did I

  • hit? She never even told me what the terrible price actually was. Ok, I-I-oooh, woah!

  • I see that the- the meter-

  • It's counting down, so I should be getting- I'm g-whoooo- hey trash can! I-

  • Ah! Boxes! Okay- oh, s**t.

  • Oh, jeez. Oh, geez. I'm all over the road here- Oww, shit! Uh-oh.

  • Alright. Backing up. Yep. Yep, yep, yepyepyep- okay, let's try that again without dying.

  • Hopefully, anyway...

  • Not 100% sure on this- whoa! (Whoa, whoa, whoah...)

  • Goddamn! Whoa, whoa-w-w-whoa, I didn't know this was gonna be skill-based!

  • I don't have a lot of skills, so I don't know how this is gonna work out!

  • Oh, geez.

  • Probably shouldn't be going full throttle...

  • Oh, G- oh, goddammit, I didn't- ugh!

  • 'Kay, I'm getting close - I'm only 1.5 units away from my destination, I think!

  • ugh

  • I don't know what that sign said, but it was probably important for me to know it...

  • Okay?

  • Road got straight.

  • Okay, almost there!

  • *whimper*

  • Okay I did It! A-Averiville

  • Turn le-okay. I'm going to Averville. The following shops appear to still be open:

  • Supermarket, mechanic, pharmacy, pawnshop, leave. Oh. Thank god some places are still

  • open at this hour.

  • Why do I need money? What?

  • What? *constipated grunts* What am i doing i am so confused

  • HI!!! WHOA What happened to your EYES?!?!?!

  • Oh geez! Following items are available. Let's get some-

  • 'I don't like the way this guy is staring at me'. Let's get some cigs and get out of

  • here.

  • Yeah, let's get them cigarettes, get some chocolate -

  • don't judge me. I'm- I'm emotional at the moment. I just summoned a demon and got

  • ultimate power, so don't *breathes* you mess with me bro.

  • Okay, I got stuff I don't know- a scratch card I guess, I'm not sure. Okay...

  • Oh-Oh okay, I'm not a winner this time.

  • I'll give it one more go and then we'll see what happens...

  • BINGO! Yeah the winner is me! Is this the ultimate power finally getting to me?

  • All right I'm out of here. Alright, I guess I can go to the mechanic...

  • Jesus, what is happening here? Oh god! 'I don't like this guy's attitude' I don't

  • like any of these guys' face! Ugh! Right, so I guess I could repair the car, but I don't

  • know why...

  • Ooo, hello.

  • Okay, can I?

  • Oh geez.

  • Repair it? All right did that.

  • It's good I guess... My fuel... Yeah, okay...

  • Upgrades...

  • What is this? Bull bars reduce collision damage?

  • (Whispers) What the fuck?

  • This one? All right ok.

  • (Quietly) This is what I do.. this- this- this is bizarre.

  • This is just bizarre.

  • I don't even know why this is happening. Aw, it's so weird.

  • Hello. 'I can feel this guy silently judging me'

  • Let's see quaaludes?!? Why is that on here?

  • I'm out of here, good god! Buh... Alright, pawn shop

  • Ugh... Hey buddy. 'Following items are available': Bible, matches, collar Bell

  • Oh a book, a candle, and a bell! Don't I need a bell?

  • Wait, do I still need these things? I don't know if I need these things. I need a

  • candle.

  • I-I guess I need this!

  • Woah jeez. This isn't a candle though.

  • But I got matches for a candle I suppose. 'There's something I don't like about this

  • place' -

  • Well it seemed like a normal supermarket than a pawn shop...

  • All right, whatever. I guess I'm gonna head back now.

  • Okay where -

  • Whoa. What the-WHAT?

  • Oh shit! Is this going back?

  • Oh, I don't know. I don't know where I'm going! I don't know what I'm doing!

  • What the hell is going on here?

  • Oh jeez, dude

  • Oh geez du-ooh. Whoa almost hit that...

  • Oh hello! What was that?

  • Oh, there's cows on the road!

  • I am *hesitates*

  • unbelievably confused. Incredibly confused.

  • Hey, what was that? Deep it? Dub it? Do it? Do what? Do what?! Ah shit.

  • *vroom vroom screechy car noises*

  • Uh-oh. Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, hey, whoa, hey, whoa, hey - why is this happening? Why this is happening

  • whuh-oh okay. Uhhh...

  • Oh geez, the road is getting awfully treacherous - hey whoa what was - that!!

  • WHAT?!

  • YOU SUFFERED A FATAL CAR ACCIDENT?!

  • WOULD YOU LIKE TO RESTART?? I don't even know what happened! That wasn't fatal! What are you talking about??

  • Oh god damn it! What the fuck??

  • What happened??

  • What, did I not get to it???

  • What the fuck happened??