That beige windbreaker is really lighting up my board.

Oh..

Do you know what I mean? My vagina

God, that woman is of cancer

Bye, Jeff!

Oh, God. Here comes that weird little stay-at-home mom.

Oh my God, what is she wearing?

Hi.

Hi, guys!

Maddie was up all night barfing on my hair...

But it's great. I'm very happy

Gross. I think she just got her sadness all over me.

Here comes Amy!

I just don't know how you can leave your kids all day and go to work.

Oh, yeah. But I also need things like... money.

Right.

I'll se you guys later.

I just love how hard she works.

Such a hard worker.

I just said that, Vicky.

We've got 4 minutes to get Ross out of the vet.

We should be fine.

You're super late for your marketing meeting.

I can't believe I'm gonna be late to my first soccer practice!

You havin' a bad day?

It could not get any wor... Ah!

Damn!

[Screams]

I called this emergency PTA meeting...

to address an issue that affects the safety of our children.

Terrorism!

The bake sale.

Is this a joke?

What's that now?

I can't do this anymore.

I'm done.

In this day and age, it's impossible to be a good mom.

Screw it. Let's be bad moms.

I'm in.

To bad moms!

Oh, my God. Somebody moved my stool.

Amy, hi!

I was calling to see if you'd like to join me at the movies this afternoon.

Are we allowed to do that?

This has literally been the best day of my life.

Have a great day at school!

Hey, Amy. PTA meeting at two. Will we see you there?

No.

Bye!

I run the PTA. Nobody takes a class or plays a clarinet unless I say so.

She's a bully! We have to take down these perfect moms.

I say we go punch that chick right in the tits.

Yes!

This is the best PTA meeting ever!

I haven't had sex since my divorce.

What if I get someone who's not circumcised?

Run out of the room screaming.

It's like finding a gun in the street. Just scream and get outta there!

I love you!

Oh, my God, mom. Not so loud.

I love my babies so much!