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  • There's a concept in the sales world called KISS vs. KILL.

  • Keeping it short and simple versus keeping it long and lengthy.

  • Amateur salesman would "KILL" the sale by going on and on about unimportant details.

  • A good salesman on the other hand would hit all of the important points in the shortest

  • time possible and close the deal.

  • Tip#1 is to be efficient with your speaking.

  • Conversation is all about quality.

  • Try to remove all types of filler words like, "Uhm, Like, I Guess, Well, Uhhhhh, You Know."

  • These words bring no value to the conversation and they literally mean nothing.

  • Listen to the following paragraph.

  • What did you do this winter?

  • Well, I had an ok time this break.

  • I went snowboarding for the first time with some of my friends and uhm.... well it's actually

  • a lot harder than it looked.

  • Uh...that's about it.

  • I guess I had fun haha.

  • Now compare it to this, "What did you do this winter?"

  • Me and my friends went snowboarding.

  • It was actually my first time and it was a lot harder than it looked.

  • Notice how the second version is much shorter, but the information being conveyed is the

  • exact same.

  • However it sounds more confident and even more sophisticated.

  • Don't be afraid to take pauses instead of relying on filler words as a crutch.

  • Pauses can be powerful and can emphasize different parts of the message.

  • Here's an example of pauses in action with the same sentence that we mentioned before.

  • Me and some friends went snowboarding...It was actually my first time but...it was a

  • lot harder...than it looked.

  • Tip#2 is to use pauses to emphasize different parts of the message and to deliver more powerful

  • messages.

  • The following skill is probably the single most important skill in terms of overall conversation

  • ability.

  • If you can master this one skill, you'll be able to have endless conversations with just

  • about anybody.

  • Tip#3 is conversational threading.

  • Within every sentence, there are different topics that you can branch off into.

  • Let's take a look at the following sentence.

  • I live in New York City but, I've always wanted to move to the suburbs.

  • It's because I love nature and I hate being around too many people.

  • There are four different topics that you can branch off from here.

  • You can talk about that time you wanted to visit New York City.

  • You can talk about how you feel living in the suburbs.

  • You can talk about your relationship with nature, and you can also talk about how you're

  • also an introvert and how you can relate with their hate with being around too many people.

  • When a conversation dies it's usually because there are no other topics to talk about that

  • are interesting.

  • So when given the opportunity to branch off into different topics, choose one that you

  • are interested in talking about.

  • Also keep in mind, that you want to be giving the other person opportunities to talk about

  • multiple topics as well.

  • If you don't give them topics to branch off into, the conversation will eventually reach

  • a dead-end.

  • Now this skill comes with practice.

  • The more you try to look for topics to bounce off of, the more you will notice them.

  • Here's another sentence.

  • I like going to the gym.

  • There's a sense of satisfaction I get when I see myself getting better at something.

  • Now there are three different topics that you can branch off from here.

  • You can talk about how you like going to the gym.

  • You can talk about something that satisfies you.

  • You can also talk about something that you got better at.

  • Think back to the last time you went on an interview.

  • When I think of an interview, I think of something that is high tension, nerve-wrecking, and

  • definitely not something that the average person enjoys going through.

  • A common mistake that a lot of people make when meeting someone new, is entering what

  • I like to call "Interview Mode".

  • They bombard the other person with question after question after question, and this can

  • be extremely uncomfortable.

  • The issue with asking too many questions is that it makes the conversation very one sided.

  • When you ask a question you're not sharing any information about yourself.

  • All you're doing is demanding information from the other person.

  • This is where that uncomfortable feeling comes from.

  • There's a lack of connection that is being built.

  • You want to be sharing information about yourself as much as possible so that you can build

  • rapport.

  • Build a connection.

  • Tip#4 is to use statements instead of questions.

  • When you make statements you share information about yourself.

  • Pay attention to the next time you hang out with your closest friends or buddies.

  • You'll notice that the majority of the conversation is with statements.

  • Once in a while a question is thrown in as a natural step in the conversation, but the

  • large majority will be all statements.

  • Now there are a lot of different types of statements, and I'll cover the main ones.

  • We have the story opinion statement.

  • Basically a statement that tells a small story or shows your opinion on something.

  • Here is an example of a question.

  • What are you scared of?

  • Here is an example of the story statement being used to replace this question.

  • I used to be terrified of the dark.

  • When I was a kid, I would sleep with my head under the covers to hide from all the monsters

  • and ghosts.

  • Notice how the question shares nothing about yourself.

  • It doesn't really give the other person a topic to jump to besides answering your question.

  • So your only really giving them one thing to talk about.

  • On the other hand, the story statement shares information while it also gives the other

  • person opportunities to talk about different topics.

  • You're giving them different things to thread off of.

  • They can talk about whether or not they're scared of the dark.

  • They can talk about things they used to do when they were a kid.

  • And they can even talk about ghost stories.

  • All of these can be branched off of this statement.

  • Next up we have the cold read statement.

  • This is a great way to use statements with someone you just met.

  • Simple put, it's an observation that you make about the other person.

  • Instead of saying something like, "Hey, what do you like to do for fun."

  • You can say something like, "Hey, you look like a fun person.

  • I bet you have some interesting hobbies."

  • This is a great trick because the person can respond in three different ways.

  • Number 1: You're wrong, and they'll correct you.

  • I'm actually not fun.

  • I sleep all day.

  • Number 2: You're wrong but, you'll be asked why you thought so.

  • "I'm actually not fun but, I'm curious as to why you thought I was.

  • Number 3: You're correct and a large amount of rapport will be built instantaneously.

  • I am fun, I love to dance and sing.

  • How did you know?!?

  • Each of these ways gives you many more opportunities to branch off into different topics as compared

  • to the simple question, "What do you do for fun?"

  • So you're sharing information first, and you're not asking anything from them.

  • It's up to them to decide how to respond.

  • And finally we have the random statement.

  • They're completely random statements that are literally the thoughts that just pop into

  • your mind.

  • They can range from anything about; things that are happening around you, or observations,

  • stories, random thoughts.

  • There's a whole lot of things that you can talk about.

  • Here's some examples: I'm tired of my friends all they talk about is sports all day.

  • Look at that guy, he's having so much fun.

  • I wish I could be that loose.

  • I'm thinking about taking a year off from school.

  • Each of these statements share a lot of information about yourself.

  • They also provide multiple topics to branch off into.

  • And finally they bring a sense of creativity and spontaneous-ness to the conversation.

  • There's three other tips that I could cover but, each one has so much information that

  • it would literally take me an entire video just to cover.

  • We could talk about humor, which is an extremely complicated way to dance and play with your

  • words.

  • We could talk about storytelling, which is essentially telling a captivating and exciting

  • story that will allow strangers to jump into your world.

  • Or we could talk about how to have a deep conversation, which is an essential tool to

  • building long lasting, valuable, relationships.

  • What I'd like for you guys to do, is to comment below and let me know which video you want

  • me to work on next.

  • Now remember conversation is a skill, and just like any skill there is value to learning

  • it.

  • But the most growth will be experienced when you actually go out there and you practice

  • what you've learned.

  • By applying some of the tips and tricks that we cover today, you'll see a massive improvement

  • in your future conversations.

There's a concept in the sales world called KISS vs. KILL.

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