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  • Hey neighbour.

  • Oh, hi America.

  • What's with the decorations?

  • It's Canada Day.

  • We're having a little get-together.

  • Ca-na-da Day?

  • Yeah... ummm,

  • kinda like July 4th for you guys.

  • Yeah, but we do July 4th

  • because we got lots of stuff to celebrate!

  • We got eagles... and freedom...

  • and KFC.

  • What do YOU have to celebrate?

  • Did you just say

  • what do WE have to celebrate?

  • Yeah, I...

  • Universal Healthcare.

  • So, if you break your leg

  • you can still afford a snack while you wait in the ER.

  • The Metric System,

  • but to be fair,

  • EVERYBODY ELSE has that except you.

  • Maternity Leave,

  • because we think if a woman carries around another human

  • for nine months,

  • she might need some time off.

  • Poutine,

  • french fries, gravy, cheese curds.

  • If angels owned food trucks,

  • they'd make poutine.

  • Bagged Milk.

  • It's more environmentally friendly,

  • plus it feels like your holding a cold wet baby.

  • So you...

  • And beer.

  • Actual beer.

  • Not yellow water.

  • Beer,

  • and LOTS of it.

  • Buttertarts.

  • If you put sex and gold into a blender?

  • You'd get a buttertart.

  • Of course... hockey.

  • We did it first.

  • We still do it best.

  • But American teams win the Stanley Cup.

  • AMERICAN TEAMS.

  • CANADIAN PLAYERS.

  • Oh... and to your KFC point?

  • Colonel Sanders LIVED in Canada.

  • So we made it even better by pronouncing it...

  • K'ehFC.

  • It's true.

  • He lived in Canada from 1965 to 1980.

  • Yeah, that is weird,

  • but, it's true.

  • But you know what we don't have?

  • What?

  • Pennies,

  • 'cause they're stupid pocket weights.

  • Y'all do have some stuff to celebrate, I guess.

  • Yeah.

  • Sorry.

Hey neighbour.

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