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  • "Dear Miss Kelsey, we regret to inform you that you have not been accepted at Hogwarts due to your GPA."

  • Hogwarts is nothing like the books.

  • Sure, you have your houses.

  • Your athletic jocks in Gryffindor.

  • Your jaded wannabe, Slytherins.

  • Your hipster nerds in Ravenclaw.

  • And your happy Hufflepuffs.

  • But that's about where the similarities end.

  • What, what the hell are you doing in there?

  • Just studying some herbology.

  • Dude, those are recreational spells.

  • In the goddamn room?

  • The Gryffindors hated losing.

  • Almost as much as the Slytherins loved cheating.

  • Wait a minute!

  • You took a Felix Felicis potion!

  • It wasn't a Hogwarts party without an old fashioned duel.

  • Cops!

  • And Dementors could suck the soul out of a party in seconds.

  • So, there you have it.

  • Hogwarts isn't what you expected.

  • But, at least it's full of the brightest students around.

  • Will, whoa, wait, buddy.

  • Where you going? Where you going?

  • I'm flying home; broomin' home.

  • You can't fly home, I saw you chugged like five butterbeers, man.

  • I'm fine. C'mon...

  • What're you, what're you, like, Dumbledore?

  • I'm, I'm flying, I'm flying outta here, man.

  • No, dude, just stay. I'm gonna...Just stay...

  • I'm going home! No, no, no!

  • Oh!

  • Will. Will, get up man.

  • C'mon, buddy.

  • Just get up, just...c'mon...wake up.

"Dear Miss Kelsey, we regret to inform you that you have not been accepted at Hogwarts due to your GPA."

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If Hogwarts Were A College

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    韓澐 posted on 2022/05/27
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