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  • - HOW MANY OF YOU HAVE KIDS?

  • [cheers and applause]

  • I DON'T.

  • [laughter]

  • THAT IS WHY THERE'S NO GUM IN MY HAIR.

  • FOR THOSE OF YOU THAT DO HAVE KIDS,

  • HERE'S THE PROBLEM WITH KIDS I FIND.

  • THEY WANT YOU TO HELP WITH THE HOMEWORK, DON'T THEY?

  • DO THEY ASK YOU-- YEAH.

  • AND THEN YOU TRY TO HELP,

  • BUT THEN IN YOUR HEAD, YOU'RE THINKING,

  • "I DON'T KNOW HOW TO DO THIS.

  • "THE WHOLE REASON I BECAME AN ADULT

  • "IS SO I WOULD NOT HAVE TO DO HOMEWORK.

  • YOU'RE THE KID."

  • AND SO I WANT TO HELP THE KIDS OUT,

  • AND I ASKED SOME OF MY YOUNG VIEWERS

  • TO SEND ME THEIR HOMEWORK QUESTIONS

  • FOR A NEW SEGMENT THAT I'M CALLING

  • "HOMEWORK-ER HELPER-ER."

  • [singing] - A-B-C

  • EASY AS 1, 2, 3

  • AS SIMPLE AS DO, RE, MI

  • A-B-C, 1, 2, 3

  • BABY, YOU AND ME, GIRL

  • A-B-C

  • EASY AS 1, 2, 3

  • AS SIMPLE AS DO, RE, MI

  • A-B-C, 1, 2, 3

  • BABY, YOU AND ME, GIRL

  • - ALL RIGHT, JUST WANTED TO GET TO THAT ONE PART.

  • THIS QUESTION IS FROM NEEL MANGLANI,

  • I BELIEVE, FROM THE NETHERLANDS.

  • SO MUCH FOR HELPING AMERICA.

  • NEEL, I CAN HELP YOU, BUT THE FIRST QUESTION--

  • IT REMINDS ME OF A CLASSIC JOKE.

  • WHY WAS SIX AFRAID OF SEVEN?

  • all: WHY WAS SIX AFRAID OF SEVEN?

  • - BECAUSE MATH IS TERRIFYING.

  • [laughter]

  • OKAY, LET'S TRY TO FIGURE THIS OUT.

  • SO THE QUESTION IS, WHY--

  • IF X EQUALS THE SQUARE ROOT OF 3--

  • SO IF X EQUALS

  • THE SQUARE ROOT

  • OF 3

  • AND Y EQUALS

  • THE SQUARE ROOT

  • OF 3,

  • THEREFORE, "A" MUST EQUAL

  • THE SQUARE ROOT OF 3,

  • BECAUSE IF LETTERS ARE ANYTHING LIKE PEOPLE,

  • THEY'RE ALL EQUAL

  • AND DESERVE TO BE TREATED EQUALLY.

  • [cheers and applause]

  • AND IF YOUR TEACHER SAYS THAT'S WRONG,

  • YOU TELL HIM HE'S A BIGOT.

  • [laughter]

  • NEXT QUESTION.

  • SO THIS QUESTION COMES FROM STEPHANIE STERGIS

  • IN CONCORD, NORTH CAROLINA.

  • SHE SAYS:

  • WELL, STEPHANIE, SINCE YOUR QUESTION

  • IS ABOUT SPANISH CLASS,

  • I WILL ANSWER YOU IN ESPANOL.

  • YO NO SE. NEXT QUESTION.

  • NEXT QUESTION IS FROM AMANDA LANGOLF...

  • [laughter]

  • PORT HERON, MICHIGAN.

  • AMANDA, I'M NOT GONNA ANSWER THIS QUESTION.

  • LUCKILY, MY PRODUCER ANDY IS AN EXPERT

  • ON HUMAN SEXUALITY.

  • ANDY. - WHAT?

  • - HI, SO THE QUESTION IS, SHE--

  • WHAT COULD SHE USE AS SOME PROPS

  • TO DISCUSS SEXUALITY?

  • YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT THIS EARLIER.

  • TELL ME WHAT YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT EARLIER.

  • - I HAVE NO-- I HAVE NO--SEXY--

  • SEXY PROPS, MAYBE?

  • - WHATEVER COMES TO MIND.

  • WHAT COMES TO MIND RIGHT NOW

  • WHEN YOU THINK OF PROPS FOR SEXUALITY?

  • - VEGETABLES. - OKAY.

  • [laughter]

  • WHAT TYPES OF VEGETABLES?

  • - [scoffs]

  • [laughter]

  • ZUCCHINI.

  • [laughter]

  • - OH, YOU GO WITH THE ZUCCHINI, DO YOU?

  • - I THINK-- I THINK WE'RE GOOD.

  • - OKAY. WELL, YOU HAVE A DAUGHTER.

  • WHAT DID YOU TALK TO ERIN ABOUT?

  • - I HAD HER MOTHER DO THAT WITH HER.

  • - OH, OKAY.

  • WELL, SO JUST THEN-- IF YOU'LL JUMP TO--

  • EXPLAIN THE SALE OF SEX. WHAT IS THAT?

  • - WELL, IT'S--

  • I CAN'T REALLY WIN HERE. IT'S A BAD THING.

  • AND IT'S WHERE PEOPLE PAY SOMEONE

  • FOR AFFECTION.

  • - RIGHT. THAT'S A GOOD WAY TO PUT IT.

  • HOW MUCH IS TOO MUCH?

  • [laughter]

  • - $150?

  • [laughter]

  • - WOW.

  • IT'S A BEEN A WHILE FOR YOU SINCE YOU'VE BEEN OUT THERE.

  • [laughter]

  • ALL RIGHT, THAT'S ENOUGH. KIDS ARE WATCHING.

  • THANK YOU FOR SENDING THOSE QUESTIONS.

  • IF ANYBODY NEEDS ANY HELP WITH AN ASSIGNMENT,

  • PLEASE SEND IT TO ME.

- HOW MANY OF YOU HAVE KIDS?

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A2 US TheEllenShow laughter square root question homework root

Ellen the Homework Helperer

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    羽珊 posted on 2016/10/09
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