Subtitles section Play video
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[Dramatic Music plays]
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Hey, Jacksepticeye...
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I bet you think we're bros.
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Just cause we hang out.
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I bet you think we're straight up - homedogs.
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Just cause we hugged once.
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Well guess what?
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I HATE MY DOG.
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AND I HATE YOU TOO.
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This is the JackSepticEye roast.
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Prepare to get flamed.
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Bitch.
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[Dramatic Music plays]
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JackSepticEye...
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More like
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JackSeptic... Bye.
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[Music plays]
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Hey Jack!
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[Laughs]
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When I first saw you
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I gagged.
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Jack!
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Your facial hair makes you look like...
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..a pre-pubescent member of ISIS.
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And don't even think making fun of my hair
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Because you wish you had this hair.
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[Spitting noise] Bitch.
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...That was so unnecessary.
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Your abs
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Looks like a vagina...
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So I have to blur it.
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Blur that shit!
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Point proven.
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Hey Jack!
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This is what your fans think you look like.
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But this is what you really look like.
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Which is convenient,
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Because your videos are about as cringey as a Dove commercial.
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(Music plays)
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[Music stops] Hey - hey Jack.
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I found-
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I found your twin.
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[Music resumes playing]
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Get it? Cause you're Irish.
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See this?
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Jacksepticeye is clearly a Nazi.
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Don't hate me, I only spit the truth.
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Jack!
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You make me wanna lose my clothes.
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And not because you're hot.
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Because you're ripping me off!
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[Music plays]
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How come I can't find any diapers in your merch store?
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How 'bout you start selling some PewDiePie dildos here.
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So your fans can act like you and SUCK MY DICK.
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[Music plays]
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You only made it big because I gave you a shoutout!
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You're my Make A Wish, bitch!
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This is you as a fucking Minecraft!
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ALL YOU DO.
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IS FUCKING SCREAM IN YOUR FUCKING VIDEOS!
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DO YOU THINK YOU'RE FUNNY AND CREATIVE?!
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People say I'm the Trump of Youtube?!
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Yeah well-then you're the Hillary Clinton!
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THE ONLY REASON PEOPLE WATCH YOUR VIDEOS
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is because you're a TRAINWRECK-
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AND PEOPLE CAN'T LOOK AWAY.
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YOU'RE LITERALLY WORSE THAN RAY WILLIAM JOHNSON.
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I- I'm sorry that was...
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That was too far.
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JackSepticEye...
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More like...
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Jackseptic... Tank.
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[Moaning]
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I'm roasting your whole family Jack.
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You're all a bunch of potatoes.
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That's right bitch, you got roasted.
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Now what are you gonna do about it?
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Bitch.
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Some people like to think that Jack got big because of me.
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Because I gave him a shoutout.
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But I gave a shit ton of- I gave like...
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At least thirty people a shout out.
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And none of them went nearly as far
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And were nearly as successful as Jack
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That's because Jack is a talented
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Funny,
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Charismatic,
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Beautiful Irish man.
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I love you. [kiss noise]
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I'm happy you're my friend.
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Please don't unsubscribe.
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I hope you guys enjoyed this roast!
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Let me know if you want more!
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Leave a like if you enjoyed!
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And I'll see you bros in the next video.
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As always...
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Stay awesome bros!
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M'kay we will go with-
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Evenecesseneseh
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5 points.
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Cause he needs to wake up and kill himself.
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Why you so mean?