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  • Can I be Khaleesi?

  • Is it a modern Khaleesi chair?

  • I feel like I could be Khaleesi, I just need Tyrion, I need my men, some swords.

  • Were rolling, right?

  • Hey, it’s Marie Forleo and you are watching MarieTV, the best place to be if you want

  • to create a business and life that you love.

  • Now, if youve ever wondered how to find a good mentor, especially when everyone is

  • so darn busy, this is the episode for you.

  • Today's question comes from Katlego and she writes:

  • Hi Marie.

  • I’ve got big visions and dreams.

  • I’m working hard to make them happen and now I’m wondering how can I find a great

  • mentor.

  • I know this is an important key to success but I find that awesome people are often so

  • busy and already mentor others.

  • I’ve also found that thecould you be my mentor?”

  • question is their most dreaded.

  • So how have you connected with people operating at higher levels than you in order to have

  • a learning relationship with them that is mutually beneficial?

  • Thanks, Katlego.”

  • Katlego, great question and I love how aware you are that the questioncould you be

  • my mentor?” is often the most dreaded.

  • So my take on mentorship is a little bit different than some others.

  • You know, I have colleagues who swear by the power of mentorship and finding that one person

  • who you can learn from.

  • But for me, I’ve never felt that way.

  • I like learning from a lot of different people with no anticipation or expectation that one

  • person’s gotta take me under their wing.

  • That feels like too much pressure to me and not really the kind of relationship I honestly

  • want to have with anyone.

  • But no matter what your perspective is, there are loads of ways to get the guidance and

  • that support that you desire, and you can do it starting right now.

  • Here are 6 ways to help you get started.

  • Number one, you do not need to meet someone to be mentored by them.

  • You know, when I was first getting started, and it's something I still do to this day,

  • I often got mentored by people I have never even met.

  • I did it on my own schedule through books and tapes and interviews.

  • You know, something we often take for granted is how much effort it takes to write a book

  • or deliver a speech or give a great interview.

  • I mean, those things contain people’s best thoughts, all their experiences, and all of

  • their lessons, and theyre there for you to review and revisit as much as you want.

  • And these days, oh my goodness, with podcasts and online content seemingly coming out of

  • every freaking orifice, you have got mentorship opportunities up the wazoo.

  • It’s literally an explosion of free mentorship.

  • An explosion of free mentorship.

  • Explosion.

  • It’s combustible.

  • Free wisdom experience.

  • Business smarts go head to head.

  • Business smarts.

  • Tony f****** Robbins.

  • Oprah f****** Winfrey.

  • And Sir Richard f****** Branson.

  • Number two, don't look for one, look for many.

  • I want you to be a swinger.

  • Alright?

  • Youve heard of polyamory, try polymentory.

  • In other words, do not put so much pressure on one relationship.

  • It’s not wise emotionally or intellectually.

  • Look, if youre only getting advice from one person, youre missing out on hearing

  • and learning from different points of view.

  • And, let’s be honest, no one person is going to have all the answers.

  • So rather than looking for mentorship from just one person, focus your efforts on building

  • a strong network of relationships, and not all of them should be with people who appear

  • to behigherthan you on the success totem pole.

  • Here’s what I mean.

  • Number three, do not always look up.

  • Look to the side.

  • So some of my most trusted advisors are people I consider peers.

  • I’m not a person who puts a lot of emphasis on social hierarchy as it is, but when youre

  • looking for people to connect with and learn from do not underestimate the power of looking

  • to your colleagues too.

  • They might actually be behind you or maybe just a little bit ahead, so to speak, but

  • here’s why they are super valuable.

  • Because oftentimes theyre closer to resolving the kinds of challenges and issues that you're

  • struggling with right now.

  • And when you talk with people who are so far beyond where youre currently at in your

  • journey, they often don't even deal with the kind of problems that youre dealing with

  • anymore.

  • So their advice may not be as relevant or tactical.

  • Also, they might be good at things that youre not, your colleagues, and so you guys can

  • help each other, which means everybody wins.

  • Number four, be specific, not vague.

  • So one of the main reasons that people want to have a mentor in the first place is so

  • they can shorten their learning curve and avoid making common mistakes.

  • Well, here’s one super common mistake that you can avoid whether you have an official

  • mentor or not.

  • When you ask questions, be specific.

  • Not vague.

  • So, for example, in your experience, what’s the best membership site plugin out there

  • if my budget is under a thousand dollars per year?

  • Now, that is a way better question than, “hey, will you mentor me in my online business?”

  • Bottom line, you are much more likely to get help if you ask for advice on how to solve

  • a specific problem versus wanting someone to direct your entire project or your career.

  • Number five is earn respect and trust through action.

  • So this one is so huge.

  • If there’s someone out there that you really want to learn from, youve got to be a true

  • and devoted fan.

  • So buy their books and leave reviews, be a customer of their business if that makes sense.

  • If someone teaches, go take their courses or their workshops and be a stellar standout

  • student.

  • If they speak, go buy tickets.

  • Show up and, if you can, introduce yourself.

  • And if they have an online presence, be a consistent, thoughtful, and engaged supporter.

  • You want to let them know that their work affected you in some way.

  • Like, tell them, how did it improve your life or how did it help you get results?

  • Because people love hearing that theyve had an impact.

  • And, look, as youve shared, people that are creating really cool things in this world

  • are busy.

  • Like, insanely busy.

  • And it’s not that theyre ungenerous or theyre narcissistic or theyre stingy,

  • theyre usually just incredibly creative people who are stretched to the max to deliver

  • on their mission.

  • So the way that you earn trust and respect is by showing up in their world with a genuine,

  • generous, and non-agenda-filled heart.

  • You cannot be needy, you cannot be attached to an outcome, and, of course, you cannot

  • force someone to notice you.

  • But I guarantee, if youre a consistent, true fan, youre going to learn so much

  • about how they operate simply by observing them and engaging with what they do.

  • And that will teach you a ton in and of itself.

  • Number six, do great work in the world.

  • So this one is the most important step if you want to develop real relationships with

  • people you admire.

  • So start building up your body of work, be consistent, hustle your buns off.

  • Nobody wants to start a business relationship with someone who isn’t out there busting

  • their hump and actually doing the work.

  • So realize that if you stay focused on the quality of your work and you truly care for

  • your people, so your customers, your clients, your fans, your colleagues, your bosses, whichever

  • term fits for you, you will get noticed, guaranteed.

  • And as we wrap up this conversation on mentorship, no matter who you want to connect with, remember

  • this tweetable.

  • If you want someone to invest in you, give them a reason to believe in you.

  • That was my A to your Q, Katlego, I really do hope it helps.

  • And now I would love to hear from you.

  • What’s your experience with mentorship, either wanting one, having one, or being one?

  • What are some do’s and don'ts from your experience?

  • Leave a comment below and let us know.

  • Now, in case you didn't know, the best conversations happen over at MarieForleo.com so go over

  • there and leave a comment now.

  • And once you get there, be sure to subscribe to our email list and become an MF insider.

  • Youll get instant access to a powerful training called How to Get Anything You Want.

  • It’s really good.

  • Youll also get some exclusive content and some special giveaways and personal updates

  • that I just don't share anywhere else.

  • Stay on your game and keep going for your dreams because the world needs that special

  • gift that only you have.

  • Thank you so much for watching and I’ll catch you next time on MarieTV.

  • Hashtag?

  • Should we hashtag it?

  • Just hashtag everything.

  • Wisdom.

  • I need it.

  • I need it.

  • I need it, need it, need it.

  • Business smarts go head to head.

  • Everybody pee wherever the hell they want.

  • That’s what I say.

  • Pee where you want, just don't peejust don't pee in the middle of the living room.

  • Just pee in the bathroom and everybodyll be good.

Can I be Khaleesi?

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