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  • President Obama still has eight months left in office before his second term is up.

  • Naturally, this is a time to look back on all he's accomplished over the past eight years.

  • You know, I was going to make a joke about this, but I --

  • [ Laughter ]

  • I don't think it needs a joke.

  • I think it needs to be slow jammed.

  • You know what I'm talking about, Tariq?

  • Yeah, Jimmy.

  • I think you're saying you'd like to slow jam this news.

  • That's right. I wanna slow jam the news.

  • And I'm not the only one.

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • Hello.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • I'm President Barack Obama,

  • and I, too, would like to slow jam this news.

  • Hit me eight times!

  • ♪♪

  • It's been an honor and a privilege

  • to serve as your president over the past eight years.

  • When I first took office, our nation was facing

  • one of the worst recessions in its history.

  • Since then, we've added more than 14 million new jobs

  • and lowered the unemployment rate to under 5%.

  • Through the actions of my administration,

  • we were able to stimulate the economy

  • and get our country back on track.

  • Aww, yeah.

  • President Obama stimulated long-term growth.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • In both the public and the private sector.

  • In 2008, the country wasn't feeling in the mood.

  • It was too tired, stressed, said it had a headache.

  • But Barack lit some candles and got some silky satin sheets.

  • Silky satin sheets now

  • Told the American people, "Yes, we can."

  • Yes, we can, it's all right

  • He created tons of jobs for you and me

  • And he's got one more left for Hillary

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • As president, I'm proud

  • of the many progressive steps

  • our country has taken in recent years,

  • both socially and environmentally.

  • The United States has been a leader

  • in developing clean energy

  • to ensure the health of our planet for future generations.

  • Thanks to the Affordable Care Act,

  • an additional 20 million Americans

  • now have access to quality health care.

  • And same-sex couples across the country

  • now have a constitutional right to marry.

  • [ Cheers ]

  • In short,

  • climate change is real,

  • health care is affordable,

  • and love is love.

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • Mm, mm, mmm.

  • Commander in preach!

  • [ Laughter ]

  • You gotta listen to my man, Bareezus.

  • He's accomplished a lot in eight years.

  • Even when Congress tried to block him,

  • he found a way in through the back door.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • When Republicans... gave him lemons,

  • he made so much lemonade,

  • Beyoncé started calling him "Baracky with the good hair."

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • Baracky with the good hair

  • His first two terms ended in such a hurry

  • Wish he could go for three like my man Steph Curry

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • And now... there will be no third term.

  • I can't stay forever.

  • Besides, Daddy's got a Hawaiian vacation booked

  • in about...223 days.

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • But who's counting?

  • That being said,

  • the American people face an important decision this fall.

  • The entire world is watching,

  • and they look to us for stability and leadership.

  • Now, I know some of the presidential candidates

  • have been critical of my foreign policy.

  • I don't want to name any names.

  • He's talking about Donald Trump

  • [ Laughter ]

  • But I believe it is of the utmost importance

  • to work alongside other world leaders.

  • That's why I signed the Iran nuclear deal.

  • That's why we reopened diplomatic ties with Cuba.

  • And that's why I negotiated the new trade deal called

  • the Trans-Pacific Partnership, or TPP.

  • Now, hold on there, "Prez Dispenser."

  • [ Laughter ]

  • Are you saying you're down with TPP?

  • Yeah, you know me.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • Look, Jimmy, the TPP allows American businesses

  • to sell their products both at home and abroad.

  • The more we sell abroad,

  • the more higher-paying jobs we provide here at home.

  • It's that simple.

  • So -- So what you're saying is,

  • this trade deal will help put everyday Americans back to...

  • Work, work, work, work, work, work

  • He put us back to work, work, work, work, work

  • He put us back to... ♪

  • Work, work, work, work, work

  • [ Laughter ]

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • Now, Mr. President, since you're here, I got to ask,

  • have you been watching all the election coverage this week about Donald Trump?

  • No, but I have been watching my new favorite show,

  • "Orange is Not the New Black."

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • Whoa, whoa, whoa.

  • I'm gonna need you to Netflix and chill.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • I get it if you're a little wound up after all this time.

  • I mean, I can't imagine what it'd be like

  • to do the same job for eight straight years.

  • Jimmy, you probably never will.

  • [ Laughter and applause ]

  • Does Obamacare cover burns? ♪

  • ♪♪

  • America's best days are still yet to come.

  • Thank you, Mr. President, for all that you've done.

  • This country's on track, and that is a fact

  • Once you go Barack, you will never go back

  • Thank you for leading the red, white, and the blue

  • And that is how we slow jam the news.

  • Oh, yeah.

  • Give it up for the President of the United States,

  • Barack Obama!

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • Double mic drop!

  • We'll be right back with more of "The Tonight Show!"

  • Come on, everybody!

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

President Obama still has eight months left in office before his second term is up.

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"Slow Jam the News" with President Obama

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    alex posted on 2016/06/18
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